Richard W. Brown

Stream of Consciousness!

My random thoughts on Jan, love, grief, life, and all things considered.

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YarnStormers Transform Hanson Park!

YarnStormers Transform Hanson Park!

YarnStormers Transform Hanson Park!YarnStormers, a Cranford group, was founded with the desire to coordinate a group art project that the whole town could enjoy.

Knit the Town” by Yarn Stormers was born! The name is a play on “yarn bombing,” a style of public art graffiti made with yarn. The plan was to have it ready to install on June 11th, International Yarn Bomb Day.

Although the YarnStormers have displayed their artwork throughout Cranford, several are in Hanson Park, the site of Jan’s Memorial Triangle Garden.

Jan’s Garden is waiting on the arrival of the wind sculpture later this month.

Read more about the YarnStormers, and if you have an Instagram/Facebook account, view all the photos.

Click here for more information about the plans for Jan’s living memorial.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month will be matched dollar-for-dollar by our family. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Breaking Ground for Jan’s Memorial Garden

It has been only three days since we broke ground on the Jan Lilien Memorial Triangle Garden at Hanson Park. The many friends who joined us for the day helped us with love and support. Over the next few months, we will update the garden's work progress.

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Wedding Bliss

August Sharing Jan’s Love Newsletter is Online!

Wedding DaySharing Jan’s Love Newsletter August Issue is Online!

The August issue includes articles on:

Both are stories about our love, faith, and family journey.

Short stream posts on:

  1. Wes is One-Month-Old,
  2. 47th Wedding Anniversary,
  3. No Boxes, Empty Walls,
  4. A Century of Books,
  5. First Move Without Jan,
  6. My Chosen Family
  7. and more.

I have reviewed recent books:

Please consider donating to The Jan Lilien Education Fund, which sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month are matched dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible

Enjoy this issue and share it with anyone who might be interested.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month are matched dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

Sharing Jan’s Love Newsletter July Issue is Online!

The July issue of Sharing Jan's Love includes articles on Planning Our Wedding and Road Trippin in 1973 - both are stories about our love, faith, and family journey.
Jan's Silk Scarf

Life Can Change in a Nanosecond!

Wedding DayThree years ago, Jan and I returned from Toronto, where we had celebrated our forty-fourth wedding anniversary. I purchased a silk scarf for Jan to celebrate our love and marriage.

We were both healthy and happy.

We had gotten Fitbits before the trip and we were so active we walked 20,000 steps or more every day.

On the first day we were home, Jan went to our doctor’s office to secure a medical clearance for cataract surgery.

Neither of us anticipated anything other than quick blood work and approval for surgery.

Later in the week, Jan was called back for more blood work.

Within ten days of our return, we were meeting Dr. Rujuta Saksena, a very professional, personable, and knowledgeable oncologist, who informed us that Jan had blood cancer.

Although I live alone, Jan is still with me. Our love will never die!


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

At the Villa Rose

At the Villa Rose

At the Villa Rose by Major Alfred Edward Woodley Mason, initially published in 1910, is a mystery novel in which Major Mason introduced his French detective, Inspector Hanaud, who was an early template for Agatha Christie's famous Hercule Poirot. Missing jewels, high adventure some one hundred and fifty kilometers from Geneva, a casino, and blind love are all factors in a complex case for Hanaud, which ultimately involves a gang of frightened murderers. If you enjoy deductive mysteries like me, I highly recommend At the Villa Rose.

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Wedding Bliss

Jan Will Always Be the Love of My Life!

Jan's Wedding DressIn the days since I finished reading Aftermirth by Hillary Jordan, I have been thinking about the question posed by the narrator, can we ever know if the love we lost was the love of our life?

When I read the book, and after reflection, my answer is that we can and do know that we lost the love of our lives.

Neil Simon’s play Chapter Two describes how a widow might find happiness with a new partner, but they can never replace the love of our lives.

The essence of the monologue from Michael Larssen, Aftermirth by Hillary Jordan,

You can’t know that he was the love of your life, and do you know why? Because guess what, you aren’t dead yet. You may feel dead right now, and believe me, I’ve been there, but the fact is, until you’re lying under a tombstone of your own, you can’t be sure about anything.

Jan was and always will be the love of my life!

Our love will never die!


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.

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All I Ever Needed Was Jan’s Love!

All You Need is Love by The Beatles.

Of course, all I ever needed was Jan's love.

In the 1960s, Jan and I would sing the chorus with the Beatles,

All you need is love. All you need is love. All you need is love, love. Love is all you need.
Until I met Jan, I honestly never understood love. She transformed my life, and my love for her will never die.

Humming the song today, I made a minor adjustment. Now and forever! All I need is Jan's Love

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Final Hugs

Friends Make Life Manageable!

Ana and HugoFriendship is the foundation of a healthy and happy life.

Although I often said I did not have friends before Jan’s lymphoma diagnosis, I have always had friends I could count on and am confident they would come running if I called them.

The mix has changed since Jan died.

Long-term friends have faded away to be replaced by members of a chosen family.

Some, like Ana and Hugo, helped me move.

Others have helped me learn to manage my grief.

Yesterday was a year since the Saturday peer-run grief group started. I now belong to another one on Wednesday.

At Saturday’s group, many members kept thanking me to the point that it was starting to embarrass me.

If I have done anything to help others, it is because of Jan’s love and support.

That has allowed me to continue to do my life’s work of building community.

Our love will never die!


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

Flower Show 2022 With Friends

Jan and I always enjoyed the Philadelphia Flower Show. During hospice, Jan encouraged me to go. I drove to Philly alone but could not attend due to fire and rain; I successfully participated this year with my good friends Ron and Deborah.

Visiting Jan, the Love of my Life!

Visiting Jan, the Love of my Life!

April Showers Set the Stage for Jan's Birthday

Artwork graciously provided by Emi Sato.

Due to the heat wave this year, I visited Jan’s grave two days after our wedding anniversary.

Today’s visit was still hot but bearable compared to Tuesday’s 100-plus temperature.

Our son Mike joined me and assisted me in watering the plants in the mulched gravesite.

Like Jan, the plants have been resilient and survived a hot and dry summer.

Jan’s love is all I ever needed.

Her love transformed my life and made me a better person.

Since Jan’s death, I have worked diligently to keep her name alive.

Among these have been:

Of course, the memories I write about are part of that effort.

Our love will never die!


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

Forty-seventh Wedding Anniversary

Today, August 9, 2022, is forty-seven years since Jan and I married. The memories not only of that day but every day and night of our lives are technicolor movies that play on a loop in my mind. Jan said in her vows, that our love will last as long as “both of us possess […]

The Jan Lilien Education Fund!

YarnStormers Transform Hanson Park!
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Wedding Bliss
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Jan's Silk Scarf
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At the Villa Rose

Read: August 2022

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At the Villa Rose

by Major Alfred Edward Woodley Mason

At the Villa Rose by Major Alfred Edward Woodley Mason, initially published in 1910, is a mystery novel in which Major Mason introduced his French detective, Inspector Hanaud, who was an early template for Agatha Christie’s famous Hercule Poirot. Missing jewels, high adventure some one hundred and fifty kilometers from Geneva, a casino, and blind love are all factors in a complex case for Hanaud, which ultimately involves a gang of frightened murderers. If you enjoy deductive mysteries like me, I highly recommend At the Villa Rose.

The Goodreads summary,

In Aix les Bains during the early 20th century, Celia Harland, a beautiful (of course) young English girl down on her luck, is befriended by a wealthy widow, Madame Dauvray, an addict of “spiritualism,” and stages seances for her benefactrix, while knowing full well that the supposed manifestations from the spirit world are entirely bogus. This set-up supplies the opportunity for a criminal gang master-minded by Madame Dauvray’s maid, with their eyes on the widow’s jewelry collection, to engineer an introduction for one of their numbers, Adele Tacé (“Rossignol”), whose taunts of disbelief goad the old lady into allowing a seance to be held which, unsuspected by either Celia or her patron, will be the cover for murder and robbery.

The crux of the plot is that as a medium, Celia will be made their innocent victim, on whom suspicion is to be planted.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

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Wedding Bliss
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Final Hugs
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Visiting Jan, the Love of my Life!
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Fair Play

Read: June 2025

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Fair Play: A Novel

by Louise Hegarty

Fair Play” by Louise Hegarty is a captivating and playful novel that is both insightful and profoundly moving. It delves into the complexities of the human heart while challenging our perceptions of a beloved genre. Fans of Anthony Horowitz and Lucy Foley will appreciate this wonderfully original and genre-defying debut from Ireland. The book pays tribute to the brilliant detective novels of the early twentieth century but with a modern twist that will keep readers on the edge of their seats.

A group of friends, each with their quirks and secrets, gathers at an Airbnb to celebrate New Year’s Eve. It’s Benjamin’s birthday, and his sister, Abigail, is hosting a Jazz Age Murder Mystery-themed party. As the night unfolds, they enjoy champagne, devour hors d’oeuvres, and form or strain relationships. Someone kisses the wrong person, and someone else’s heart breaks. The setting, a grand mansion with its mysteries, adds an extra layer of intrigue to the story.

By morning, everyone wakes up—except for Benjamin.

As Abigail struggles to come to terms with her brother’s death, an esteemed detective arrives, determined to find Benjamin’s killer. The mansion is now filled with a butler, gardener, and housekeeper, making everyone a suspect, and nothing is quite as it seems. The detective’s arrival not only adds a layer of suspense but also brings a sense of hope as the characters cling to the possibility of justice and closure.

Will the culprit be revealed? And how can Abigail, feeling lost and alone, begin to piece her life back together in the wake of this tragedy?

Gripping yet playful, sharp yet profoundly moving, *Fair Play* explores the depths of the human heart while subverting one of our most beloved genres. It’s a twisty murder mystery that’s both classic and contemporary, along with a poignant exploration of grief and loss.


Louise Hegarty‘s work has appeared in Banshee, The Tangerine, The Stinging Fly, and The Dublin Review. It has also been featured on BBC Radio 4’s Short Works. She was the inaugural winner of the Sunday Business Post/Penguin Ireland Short Story Prize. Her short story “Getting the Electric” has been optioned by Fíbín Media. Louise resides in Cork, Ireland.



When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!


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Brawler: Stories

Read: March 2026

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Brawler: Stories

by Lauren Groff

In “Brawler: Stories,” Lauren Groff presents an electric collection in which each story stands as a powerful triumph—bold, agile, and intensely charged. When read together, these stories resonate in an exhilarating way. Spanning from the 1950s to the present and encompassing diverse ages, social classes, and regions—from New England to Florida and California—these nine stories reflect and explore a common theme: the ongoing struggle between the darker and lighter aspects of human nature.

“In every human being, there exists both an animal and a god, locked in a struggle for dominance,” one character tells us. Among those caught in this conflict are a young woman who suddenly becomes responsible for her disabled sibling, a hot-tempered high school swimmer in need of guidance, a mother grappling with the loss of her family, and a banking heir burdened by a different kind of inheritance. Motivated by love and hindered by the well-meaning intentions of others, they strive to do the right thing for as long as possible.

Brawler is precise, surprising, and thought-provoking, offering deep insights into human nature. It reveals the heartbreaking turning points between love and fear, compassion and violence, reason and instinct, altruism and the will to survive.


Lauren Groff is a three-time National Book Award finalist and the bestselling author of five novels, including Fates and Furies, Matrix, and The Vaster Wilds, as well as two story collections, including Florida. She has won The Story Prize and the Joyce Carol Oates Prize, and she has been a finalist for the National Book Critics Circle Award. Groff’s work frequently appears in prestigious publications such as The New Yorker and The Atlantic, and her books have been translated into 36 languages. She lives in Gainesville, Florida, where she and her husband own the independent bookstore The Lynx.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books I’ve personally vetted for quality and enjoyment. Supporting these selections not only helps me continue to provide you with personalized recommendations but also ensures you have access to meaningful stories that enrich your life. Your support truly makes a difference in helping me share more books and insights with you!


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History Lessons: A Mystery

Read: July 2025

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History Lessons: A Mystery

by Zoe B. Wallbrook

In another life, I dreamed of becoming a history professor. When I opened “History Lessons: A Mystery” by Zoe B. Wallbrook, I discovered a story about a college history professor who must solve the murder of her renowned colleague before she becomes the next target. This humorous and romantic debut mystery, filled with witty banter and clever plot twists, is perfect for fans of Janet Evanovich, Kellye Garrett, and Ali Hazelwood.

As a newly minted junior professor, Daphne Ouverture spends her days giving lectures on French colonialism, working on her next academic book, and going on atrocious dates. Her small world suits her just fine until Sam Taylor dies.

The rising star of Harrison University’s anthropology department was never one of Daphne’s favorites, despite his popularity. But that doesn’t prevent Sam’s killer from believing Daphne has something that belonged to Sam—something the killer will stop at nothing to get.

Between grading papers and navigating her disastrous love life, Daphne embarks on her investigation to find out what connects her to Sam’s murder. With the help of an alluring former detective-turned-bookseller, she unravels a deadly cover-up on campus.

This well-crafted, voice-driven mystery introduces an unforgettable heroine in the crime fiction genre.


Zoe B. Wallbrook is a recently tenured professor whose academic research has appeared in outlets such as the New York Times and The New Yorker. She was selected for mentorship by LA Times bestseller Elizabeth Little, and History Lessons, her first novel, was a runner-up for the Eleanor Taylor Bland Award. Zoe’s hobbies include beginning all emails with “My sincerest apologies for my slow reply,” pretending to understand how astrological signs work, and crying at the end of every Call the Midwife episode. She and her husband live with their stalker, a black lab/pittie mix named Sophie.



When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!


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How the Word is Passed

Read: December 2021

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How the Word Is Passed: A Reckoning with the History of Slavery Across America

by Clint Smith

How the Word Is Passed: A Reckoning with the History of Slavery Across America by Clint Smith. This book was a gift from my son Jon. The New York Times selected How the Word is Passed as one of the best books published this year. Beginning in his hometown of New Orleans, Clint Smith leads the reader on an unforgettable tour of monuments and landmarks—those that are honest about the past and those that are not—that offer an intergenerational story of how slavery has been central in shaping our nation’s collective history, and ourselves.

How the Word is Passed is one of the best books I have read in 2021. I had read an excerpt in The Atlantic on the Whitney Plantation, one of the only former plantations devoted to preserving the experience of the enslaved people whose lives and work sustained it. Like most of us, I had placed the book on my to-read list, where it remained lost in the cobwebs. Fortunately, my son Jon purchased the book for me.

Secondly, the book rekindled my long-lost dream of being an American Studies professor. As soon as Jan and I met, I dropped plans to leave Brooklyn and start graduate school in the fall of 1974. I made that decision primarily because of how much I loved Jan. But it was also partly that I did not have a clear vision of what my life would be like as a professor. The book provided clear examples of people like Yvonne Holden at The Whitney Plantation redefining history to be more accurate and inclusive. I probably could not have done as well as she did, but I can now see that it might have resulted in a career for me that could have been impactful.

Goodreads provides this overview for those who still need to be convinced to read this book.

It is the story of the Monticello Plantation in Virginia, the estate where Thomas Jefferson wrote letters espousing the urgent need for liberty while enslaving over 400 people on the premises. It is the story of the Whitney Plantation, one of the only former plantations devoted to preserving the experience of the enslaved people whose lives and work sustained it. It is the story of Angola Prison in Louisiana, a former plantation named for the country from which most of its enslaved people arrived and which has since become one of the most gruesome maximum-security prisons in the world. And it is the story of Blandford Cemetery, the final resting place of tens of thousands of Confederate soldiers.

In a deeply researched and transporting exploration of the legacy of slavery and its imprint on centuries of American history, How the Word Is Passed illustrates how some of our country’s most essential stories are hidden in plain view-whether in places we might drive by on our way to work, holidays such as Juneteenth, or entire neighborhoods—like downtown Manhattan—on which the brutal history of the trade in enslaved men, women and children has been deeply imprinted.

Informed by scholarship and brought alive by the story of people living today, Clint Smith’s debut work of nonfiction is a landmark work of reflection and insight that offers a new understanding of the hopeful role that memory and history can play in understanding our country.

How the Word is Passed is one of the best books I have read this year and many prior ones. I encourage you to read it and share your comments.

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Heart of a Stranger

Read: February 2026

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Heart of a Stranger

by Rabbi Angela Warnick Buchdahl

In “Heart of a Stranger,” Angela Buchdahl shares her journey from feeling like an outsider to becoming an officiant. She describes her transformation from estrangement to belonging, ultimately emerging with a deep conviction that we are all connected to a larger whole and purpose. Her book serves as both a memoir and a spiritual guide for everyday living, addressing a need that many of us experience today. As the first Asian American ordained as a rabbi, she offers a compelling account of her evolution into one of the world’s most respected religious leaders.

Angela Buchdahl was born in Seoul, the daughter of a Korean Buddhist mother and Jewish American father. Profoundly spiritual from a young age, by sixteen, she felt the first stirrings to become a rabbi. Despite the naysayers and periods of self-doubt—Would a mixed-race woman ever be seen as authentically Jewish or chosen to lead a congregation?—she stayed the course, which took her first to Yale, then to rabbinical school, and finally to the pulpit of one of the largest, most influential congregations in the world.

Today, Angela Buchdahl inspires Jews and non-Jews alike with her invigorating, joyful approach to worship and her belief in the power of faith, gratitude, and responsibility for one another, regardless of religion. She does not shy away from difficult topics, from racism within the Jewish community and the sexism she confronted when she aspired to the top job, to rising antisemitism today. Buchdahl teaches how these challenges, which can make one feel like a stranger, can ultimately be the source of our greatest empathy and strength.

While reading this book, I experienced a revival and deepening of my faith. “Heart of a Stranger,” “Man’s Search for Meaning,” “Judaism is About Love,” “Hostage,” and “The Amen Effect” are all cherished titles that I will reference and reread for years to come.


Angela Buchdahl is the first Asian American rabbi. She serves as the Senior Rabbi of Central Synagogue in New York City, the first woman to lead this flagship congregation in its 185-year history. Under her leadership, Central has grown into one of the largest synagogues in the world, with live-stream viewers in more than 100 countries. She has led prayers in the White House for two U.S. presidents and has been featured on national news outlets, including Today, NPR, and The Wall Street Journal, to discuss the day’s moral issues.

Rabbi Buchdahl and her husband live in New York City and have three children.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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The Vanishing Half

Read: September 2021

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The Vanishing Half

by Brit Bennett

The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett was a true page-turner, and I did not want to stop reading it even when I got to the last page. I am not a fan of sequels, but if I was ever going to change my mind, this is the book I would want to read a sequel.

Ms. Bennett focuses on two twins who run away from home at age 16. They have grown up in Mallard, a fictional town in Louisiana. “In Mallard, nobody married dark,” Bennett writes starkly. Over time, its prejudices deepened as its population became lighter and lighter, “like a cup of coffee steadily diluted with cream.” The twins, with their “creamy skin, hazel eyes, wavy hair,” would have delighted the town’s founder. One of the women chooses to pass as white while the other does not.

The Vignes twin sisters will always be identical. But after growing up together in a small, southern black community and running away at age sixteen, it’s not just the shape of their daily lives that is different as adults, it’s everything: their families, their communities, their racial identities. Many years later, one sister lives with her black daughter in the same southern town she once tried to escape. The other passes for white, and her white husband knows nothing of her past. Still, even separated by so many miles and just as many lies, the fates of the twins remain intertwined. What will happen to the next generation, when their own daughters’ storylines intersect?

Weaving together multiple strands and generations of this family, from the Deep South to California, from the 1950s to the 1990s, Brit Bennett produces a story that is at once a riveting, emotional family story and a brilliant exploration of the American history of passing. Looking well beyond issues of race, The Vanishing Half considers the lasting influence of the past as it shapes a person’s decisions, desires, and expectations, and explores some of the multiple reasons and realms in which people sometimes feel pulled to live as something other than their origins.

The question of why people choose to live differently than their origins is one that I often ponder. Growing up in a small town and living in a metropolis raises questions for me as to what my life is now and what was once.

I strongly recommend this book.

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