Letting Go of What I Cannot Change

Letting Go of What I Cannot Change

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 46 seconds
April Showers Set the Stage for Jan's Birthday

Artwork graciously provided by Emi Sato.
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One of life’s most difficult challenges is to let go of what we cannot change. As a widow, I would pay any price, bear any burden, and meet any hardship to have Jan back with me. She was, is, and always will be the love of my life. But truth be told, I cannot bring her back. All I can do is continue to love her and share her passion with others.

I share her love not because I no longer love her but because I love her now more than ever!

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Changing Ourselves

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” This quote resonated with me.

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Letting Go of What I Cannot Change
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Station Eleven: A Novel

Read: August 2024

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Station Eleven: A Novel

by Emily St. John Mandel

Station Eleven: A Novel by Emily St. John Mandel, one of The New York Times’ 100 Best Books of the Century, is set in the unsettling days of civilization’s collapse and tells the captivating story of a Hollywood star, his potential savior, and a nomadic group of actors traveling through the scattered outposts of the Great Lakes region. They risk everything for art and humanity, reminding us of the enduring power of culture even in the most dire circumstances.

Kirsten Raymonde will never forget the night Arthur Leander, the famous Hollywood actor, had a heart attack on stage during a production of King Lear. That night, a devastating flu pandemic arrived in the city, and within weeks, civilization as we know it came to an end. Little did she know that this event would set events to shape the world’s future.

Twenty years later, Kirsten, a key figure in the story, traverses the settlements of the altered world with a small troupe of actors and musicians. They are The Traveling Symphony, a group that has made it their mission to keep the remnants of art and humanity alive. Their encounters, particularly in St. Deborah by the Water, with a violent prophet threatening their existence, form a crucial part of the narrative. The story’s unique structure, moving back and forth in time, vividly depicts life before and after the pandemic, and the strange twist of fate that connects them all will keep you on the edge of your seat.

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James: A Novel

Read: June 2024

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James: A Novel

by Percival Everett

I started reading “James: A Novel” by Percival Everett, my fiftieth book this year. After reading only a few pages, I knew I had selected the perfect novel. The story revolves around an enslaved man named Jim who overhears that he is about to be sold to a man in New Orleans, separating him from his wife and daughter forever. In response, he decides to hide on nearby Jackson Island while formulating a plan.

Simultaneously, we encounter Huck Finn, who has staged his death to flee his abusive father and has recently resurfaced in town. The narrative unfolds as they embark on a perilous journey, navigating the Mississippi River on a raft. Each turn brings floods, storms, and unexpected encounters, including a run-in with the Duke and Dauphin.

While the familiar elements of ‘Adventures of Huckleberry Finn‘ are present, ‘James: A Novel‘ offers a unique perspective. It illuminates Jim’s agency, intelligence, and compassion, challenging our preconceived notions and offering a fresh take on a classic narrative.

James: A Novel‘ is not just a book; it’s a cornerstone of twenty-first-century American literature. It’s a testament to Everett’s literary prowess, solidifying his status as a true icon in the literary world.



When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!


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Tom Lake

Read: August 2023

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Tom Lake: A Novel

by Ann Patchett

Today, I began reading Tom Lake by Ann Patchett. The novel beautifully explores family, love, and growing up. Patchett once again proves herself as one of America’s finest writers. Both hopeful and mournful, it explores happiness even when the world falls apart.

The story follows Lara’s three daughters, who return to the family’s orchard in Northern Michigan in the spring of 2020. While picking cherries, they ask their mother about Peter Duke, a famous actor with whom she had a romance years before at a theater company called Tom Lake.

As Lara reminisces, her daughters are confronted with their own lives and relationships with their mothers, leading them to reevaluate everything they thought they knew. With its hopeful and mournful tone, the novel is a testament to the transformative power of understanding what happiness truly means, even amid chaos. Patchett’s compelling narrative artistry and profound insights into family dynamics weave a rich and luminous story, showcasing why she is one of our time’s most revered and acclaimed literary talents.

I have also read Patchett’s Bel Canto, a compelling tale that explores themes of strength, vulnerability, love, and confinement. It ultimately tells an inspiring story of transcendent romance.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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People Collide: A Novel

Read: October 2023

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People Collide: A Novel

by Isle McElroy

Today, I started reading “People Collide” by Isle McElroy. The book is about a gender-bending, body-switching story that explores the themes of marriage, identity, and sex. “People Collide” is a profound exploration of ambition, sacrifice, desire, and loss. The book sheds a refreshing light on themes of love, sexuality, and the truth of who we are.

The protagonist, Eli, lives with his wife, Elizabeth, in a cramped apartment in Bulgaria. One day, Eli wakes up to find that he has switched bodies with Elizabeth, who has disappeared without a trace. The story follows Eli’s journey across Europe and America to find his missing wife while he learns to exist in her body.

As Eli comes closer to finding Elizabeth, he begins to question the effect of their metamorphosis on their relationship. He wonders how long he can keep up the illusion of living as someone else. Will their marriage wither away entirely in each other’s bodies? Or will this transformation be the key to making their marriage thrive?


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

Subscribe

Contact Us

I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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A Love Story from the End of the World

Read: January 2026

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A Love Story from the End of the World

by Juhea Kim

Juhea Kim, the acclaimed author of Beasts of a Little Land and City of Night Birds, presents an exquisite collection of stories that explores the delicate balance between humans and the natural world. With the clear-eyed reverence of Richard Powers and the sparkling sincerity of George Saunders, her first story collection, A Love Story from the End of the World, offers a breathtaking view of our fractured world—and our broken hearts. Through its passionate narrative, the collection serves as a poignant reminder that, as humans, we are nothing without nature.

Spanning multiple locales and time periods, and rendered in fine detail and vivid color, this transportive collection illustrates what it means to live as human inhabitants of our singular, miraculous planet.

Lyrical, at times hilarious, and always heartfelt, each of these ten stories reflects individual choices in the face of “man-made” apocalypses. In a near-future Seoul, where air pollution has become so severe that a translucent biodome has covered the city, a civil engineer responsible for its upkeep considers an arranged marriage. A painter, disenchanted with New York City, travels to the South of France and becomes romantically involved with an entrepreneur who claims to have invented a new color. Meanwhile, on an island where the Indian and Pacific Oceans converge, and where foreign countries have dumped their waste, causing a landfill mountain to form, a local boy facing daily hardships gains internet fame for his K-pop-inspired dances.


Juhea Kim is the author of the novel Beasts of a Little Land, which was a finalist for the Dayton Literary Peace Prize and the winner of the Yasnaya Polyana Literary Award, Russia’s most significant annual award in literature. It has been translated into many languages and is for television. She is also the author of City of Night Birds, which was a Reese’s Book Club pick.

A graduate of Princeton University, her writing has been published in Granta, the Times Literary Supplement, the Independent, Zyzzyva, Guernica<, and other outlets. She is an advocate for wildlife conservation, animal rights, and education and aid in Africa. Born in Korea and raised in Portland, Oregon, Kim now lives in London.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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American Bulk

Read: February 2026

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American Bulk: Essays on Excess

by Emily Mester

In a series of deeply personal essays, Emily Mester‘s “American Bulk” examines how the things we buy, eat, accumulate, and discard become integral parts of our lives. We often guiltily watch Amazon boxes pile up on the porch, sift through countless reviews to find the perfect product, and crave the familiar comfort of a chain restaurant. With humor and sharp insight, Mester reflects on the joys and anxieties of Costco trips, how a seasonal job at Ulta Beauty taught her the subtle art of sales, and what it means to feel “mall sad.”

In a nuanced exploration of diet culture and body image, Mester shares her experience at a fat camp during her teenage summer and the unexpected sense of liberation she discovered there. Finally, she travels to Storm Lake, Iowa, to confront her grandmother’s abandoned hoard, unraveling the dysfunction at the heart of her family’s obsession with material possessions. American Bulk introduces readers to an impressive new literary voice from the American heartland, urging us to view consumption not with guilt, but with grace and empathy.


Emily Mester is a writer from the suburban Midwest, where her family shopped at Costco every Sunday. She earned an MFA in nonfiction from the University of Iowa, where she received the Prairie Lights Nonfiction Prize. Currently, she resides in New York.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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