Jack, Be Good!
Welcoming a New Member to Our Family!
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 34 secondsYesterday morning, I completed my 1,176th daily walk since my wife passed away. As I strolled, lost in thought, I received a text with the fantastic news that my second grandson, Jack Reed Nucero, had entered the world. His little smiling face filled me with overwhelming love and joy. It’s amazing how one tiny person can bring so much happiness to a family. July is a month brimming with celebrations for us. We’re blessed with four birthdays: Jack on 7/24, Lilah-Rae on 7/19, Wes Jude on 7/3, and Elyssa on 7/21. We were also supposed to mark Mike and Elyssa’s wedding anniversary yesterday, but we happily decided that Jack’s arrival would now take center stage. This shared joy has a beautiful way of uniting us as a family.
As an elderly individual with simple tastes, I frequently caught myself softly humming the lines of the Mother Goose rhyme:
Jack be nimble,
Jack be quick,
Jack jump over
The candlestick.
Reciting these words became a heartfelt blessing for my beloved grandson, Jack. To thrive, one must embody nimbleness, quickness, and readiness for action, even if one isn’t jumping over a candlestick.
July has been a genuinely transformative month for me. The turning point, the “apolytus” (ah-pahl-i-tuhs) moment, was when Wes was born. It could have been any time that summer. Maybe it was when I attended Camp Widow in San Diego two weeks after Wes’s birth or when I realized I could embrace life and live fully. Like a snake shedding its skin, I don’t fixate on the exact date and time. Humans often need these to feel liberated, but the precise timing isn’t crucial. I know I shed my mourning clothes two years ago and chose to live fully in the present.
Before that transformation, I lived in a walled garden of memories. Like many widows and those who have suffered loss, I willed myself to believe that if I focused on the memories, they would become three-dimensional, and my wife and I could live eternally. If only grieving was so simple. Leaving the walled garden, I have learned to embrace the idea that everything unfolds in the present, allowing me to avoid being consumed by a past I can no longer inhabit. My memories continue to thrive and evolve as I embrace the present and plan for the future. This redemptive perspective gives me faith in the world and drives me to strive to improve it. It’s this faith, this belief in the potential for redemption and improvement, that keeps me hopeful and motivated.
Jack, his sister Lilah-Rae, and his brother Wes bring joy and happiness into my life. Even though I may not be able to jump over a candlestick at my age, they always remind me to be nimble and quick. They are my hope for the future! May they grow up and embrace their peers as cousins, which we all are, and repair the world so we can all live in peace and harmony.
We Are All Cousins!
Welcoming a New Member to Our Family!
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 34 seconds
As I walked to my table at the Marriott Hotel Restaurant, the hostess accompanied me, and we started conversing. To my surprise, we discovered that we both had experience as caregivers. She had cared for her father, and I had done the same for my wife.
