Snow Angel Blessing

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 36 seconds

Love Warmed Our Heart on a Cold Lincoln’s Birthday in 1975

During the winter of 1975, just six months before our wedding, I went for a walk with Jan, my beloved partner, in the tranquil surroundings of Ft. Greene Park, across the street from her apartment. The air was frigid, and the ground was covered with a thick blanket of snow. The sudden winter storm had brought the heaviest snowfall of the year, with a whopping 7.8 inches of snow. Jan, a drug counselor at Brooklyn Automotive, had taken the day off for the holiday. Walking on the un-shoveled snow, it felt like we had stepped into a scene from the timeless classic novel and popular movie, “Dr. Zhivago.” The only sound we could hear was the crisp crunch of our boots on the icy terrain, which added to the serene and peaceful atmosphere.

Snow Angels

Jan lay on the ground and insisted, “Let’s make snow angels.” I joined her, and we made paired angels. I tried to help her stand up, but our feet kept slipping. Eventually, we succeeded, but as soon as I let go of her hand, she grabbed some snow and threw it at my face. I retaliated with a handful of snow, but we both laughed. We continued walking across the park, pretending to be Lara and Yuri and trying to maintain our balance on the snowy ground.

Six weeks earlier, Jan had excitedly told her parents we were getting married, but their response was far from positive. We traveled to New Jersey by bus to celebrate her mother’s birthday, but instead of congratulating her, we received a disappointed reaction: “You ruined my birthday.” Despite the opposition from her family, we both remained committed to getting married. However, my wife tended to be more pragmatic, while I was more inclined towards romance.

While walking in the snow, I couldn’t help but wonder about her decision regarding our future together. I was uncertain whether she would ultimately choose to marry me or accept her parent’s opposition. We discussed various things on our way, shared our thoughts, and enjoyed each other’s company. The sun was shining, and the breeze was cool, perfecting the atmosphere around us.

Love is a Powerful and Transformative Force.

Once we decided to leave the park, we walked up the four flights of stairs to her apartment. As we removed our coats, she turned to me, kissed me, and said, “I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Her words filled my heart with joy, and I couldn’t help but hug her tightly and kiss her back. The moment was perfect, and I felt I was on top of the world.

After that, we spent the evening talking and laughing, enjoying each other’s company. Looking back, I realize it was a turning point in our almost half-century relationship. The rest, as they say, is history.


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4 comments add your comment

    • Thanks for your comment, Hugo. I appreciate your confidence in me being a nice guy. However, the truth is that being nice doesn’t always lead to success. In my case, Jan’s parents were not happy with me due to my appearance and religious differences. Despite Jan’s practical nature, we still got married, and I documented the experience in a post, “We Are Getting Married!“. The inspiration for the story you are referring to came from the light snowfall this week, which reminded me of the tension that can arise between a practical partner and a romantic one in a relationship. Being a romantic is a part of my DNA, and I will always embrace it as an inspiration.

    • Danny, thanks for your comment. In this modern era, the word love is often used casually and loses its true meaning. But to me, it is unlike any other word with four letters. It is the most potent force in the universe, capable of bringing about personal and collective salvation.

      Recently, I was blessed with the opportunity to experience love again, and it felt like a dream come true. However, I soon realized that love requires reciprocity. If it is not mutual, it is not the true love that I seek. I am unwilling to settle for anything less than what I once had.

      In a world where love can be fleeting and elusive, we must hold on to it with all our might. All we need is love, and with it, we can conquer any challenge that comes our way.

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Land of Milk and Honey: A Novel

Read: October 2023

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Land of Milk and Honey: A Novel

by C Pam Zhang

Today, I commenced reading Land of Milk and Honey: A Novel by C Pam Zhang, the award-winning author of How Much of These Hills Is Gold; she returns with a rapturous and revelatory novel about a young chef whose discovery of pleasure alters her life and, indirectly, the world. With the arrival of forest fire smoke in my neighborhood, it seemed a timely book to read.

A smog has spread. Food crops are rapidly disappearing. A chef escapes her dying career in a dreary city to take a job at a decadent mountaintop colony seemingly free of the world’s troubles.

There, the sky is clear again. Rare ingredients abound. Her enigmatic employer and his visionary daughter have built a lush new life for the global eliteZhan, one that reawakens the chef to the pleasures of taste, touch, and her body.

The chef’s boundaries undergo a thrilling erosion in this atmosphere of hidden wonders and cool, seductive violence. Soon, she is pushed to the center of a startling attempt to reshape the world far beyond the plate.

Sensuous and surprising, joyous and bitingly sharp, told in language as alluring as it is original, Land of Milk and Honey provocatively bare the ethics of seeking pleasure in a dying world. It is a daringly imaginative exploration of desire and deception, privilege and faith, and the roles we play to survive. Most of all, it is a love letter to food, wild delight, and the transformative power of a woman embracing her own appetite.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Leadership: In Turbulent Times

Read: January 2019

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Leadership: In Turbulent Times

by Doris Kearns Goodwin

A Book for Our Turbulent Times

Leadership: In Turbulent Times by Doris Kearns Goodwin, one of America’s best presidential historians, offers an illuminating exploration of the early development, growth and exercise of leadership as demonstrated by Presidents Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, FDR and Johnson.

I received this book for Hanukkah from my granddaughter and son Mike and his girlfriend Elyssa. They know me very well. A book by Ms. Goodwin is always a must read. If you add in Lincoln, the two Roosevelt’s and LBJ, it is a book I cannot put down.

This NPR interview with Ms. Goodwin is worth listening to.

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Fourteen Days: A Collaborative Novel

Read: February 2024

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Fourteen Days: A Collaborative Novel

by Authors Guild

I started reading Fourteen Days: A Collaborative Novel today. It is set in a Lower East Side tenement during the early days of the COVID-19 lockdowns. Fourteen Days is a unique collaborative novel from the Authors Guild with a twist. A different, prominent literary voice has secretly written each character in this diverse cast of New York neighbors. These voices range from Margaret Atwood and Celeste Ng to Tommy Orange and John Grisham.

The novel’s story begins one week into the COVID-19 shutdown, where tenants of a Lower East Side apartment building in Manhattan have gathered on the rooftop to tell stories. As the nights pass, more and more neighbors join in, bringing chairs, milk crates, and overturned pails. Gradually, the tenants, some of whom have barely spoken to each other, become neighbors.

In this Decameron-like serial novel, general editors Margaret Atwood and Douglas Preston and a star-studded list of contributors create a beautiful ode to those trapped when the pandemic hit. Fourteen Days is a dazzling, heartwarming, and ultimately surprising narrative that reveals how some communities managed to become stronger despite the loss and suffering brought about by the pandemic.

Includes writing from: Charlie Jane Anders, Margaret Atwood, Joseph Cassara, Jennine Capó Crucet, Angie Cruz, Pat Cummings, Sylvia Day, Emma Donoghue, Dave Eggers, Diana Gabaldon, Tess Gerritsen, John Grisham, Maria Hinojosa, Mira Jacob, Erica Jong, CJ Lyons, Celeste Ng, Tommy Orange, Mary Pope Osborne, Douglas Preston, Alice Randall, Ishmael Reed, Roxana Robinson, Nelly Rosario, James Shapiro, Hampton Sides, R.L. Stine, Nafissa Thompson-Spires, Monique Truong, Scott Turow, Luis Alberto Urrea, Rachel Vail, Weike Wang, Caroline Randall Williams, De’Shawn Charles Winslow, and Meg Wolitzer!

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Sing, Unburied, Sing

Read: October 2024

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Sing, Unburied, Sing

by Jesmyn Ward

I started reading Jesmyn Ward‘s novel Sing, Unburied, Sing today. The New York Times selected it as one of the best books of the 21st century and awarded it the National Book Award. According to The New York Times, Jesmyn Ward‘s historic second National Book Award winner is “perfectly poised for the moment.” It’s an intimate portrait of three generations of a family and an epic tale of hope and struggle.

Jojo is thirteen years old and is trying to understand what it means to be a man. He has several father figures to learn from, including his Black grandfather, Pop. However, Jojo’s understanding is complicated by other men in his life: his absent White father, Michael, who is being released from prison; his absent White grandfather, Big Joseph, who refuses to acknowledge him; and the memories of his deceased uncle, Given, who died as a teenager.

His mother, Leonie, is inconsistent in her and her toddler daughter’s lives. She is a flawed mother in constant conflict with herself and those around her. She is Black, and her children’s father is White. She wants to be a better mother but struggles to prioritize her children over her own needs, particularly her drug use. Tormented and comforted by visions of her deceased brother, which only come to her when she’s high, Leonie is embattled in ways that reflect the harsh reality of her circumstances.

When their father is released from prison, Leonie takes her kids and a friend in her car and drives north to Mississippi and Parchman Farm, the State Penitentiary. At Parchman, there is another thirteen-year-old boy, the ghost of a deceased inmate who carries the ugly history of the South with him in his wanderings. With his supernatural presence, this ghostly figure also has something to teach Jojo about fathers and sons, legacies, violence, and love.

Described as a majestic and unforgettable family story, ‘Sing, Unburied, Sing‘ is rich with Ward‘s distinctive, lyrical language. As noted by The Philadelphia Inquirer, her unique narrative style takes readers on ‘an odyssey through rural Mississippi’s past and present.’

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Trip: A Novel

Read: September 2025

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Trip: A Novel

by Amie Barrodale

Trip: A Novel by Amie Barrodale follows a woman who embarks on a journey to the afterlife to help her son, who is lost at sea. Her voyage begins on a limbo-drifting ghost ship, blending humor and emotion as she explores the body and mind. Barrodale skillfully combines humor with poignant moments, making the supernatural feel personal. The book moved me, reflecting the emotional tides between mother and son.

Sandra dies suddenly at a death conference in Nepal. Days later in America, her son, Trip, runs away with a man. Sandra tries to send a message to Trip through the mystics, but they are distracted while her son and the man set out to sea.

Amie Barrodale‘s first novel follows the unpredictable journey of Sandra and her son, Trip, as they navigate the realms of restless souls and Buddhist deities. As they move between life and death, Sandra’s unwavering devotion to saving her child and striving to be a good mother anchors the narrative, propelling it forward with emotional depth and urgency. This book will particularly resonate with fans of literary fiction, magical realism, and those intrigued by philosophical explorations of life and death. Readers who appreciate stories rich in emotional complexity and spiritual themes will find themselves eagerly immersed in this enthralling tale.

Wide-eyed with wonder, hilariously funny and painfully moving, Trip: A Novel reveals the deeper meaning of The Tibetan Book of the Dead: the past is a memory, the future is a projection, the present disappears before we can see it.


Amie Barrodale’s stories and essays have appeared in The Paris Review, Harper’s Magazine, and other publications. In 2012, she was awarded The Paris Review’s Plimpton Prize for Fiction for her story “William Wei.” She is the author of You Are Having a Good Time: Stories.



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Audition

Read: April 2025

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Audition: A Novel

by Katie Kitamura

Today, I dove into “Audition” by Katie Kitamura, and I’m already hooked! This gripping novel explores a woman’s journey as she navigates what could be the performance of her lifetime—and perhaps even two. It’s both exhilarating and disorienting, much like a Möbius strip that challenges our understanding of the people we cherish. I can’t wait to see where this story takes me!

The narrative begins with two people meeting for lunch in a Manhattan restaurant. She is an accomplished actress in rehearsals for an upcoming premiere, while he is an attractive, troubled young man—young enough to be her son. What is his relationship to her, and how does she see him?

In this compulsively readable and brilliantly crafted novel, two competing narratives unfold, challenging our understanding of the roles we play in life – whether as partners, parents, creators, or muses – and revealing the truths that each performance conceals, particularly from those who believe they know us best.

Taut and hypnotic, “Audition” showcases Katie Kitamura‘s virtuosic writing at its finest.


Katie Kitamura is the author of four previous novels, most recently A Separation and Intimacies, which was longlisted for the National Book Award and the PEN/Faulkner Award and was a finalist for a Joyce Carol Oates Prize. She is a recipient of the Rome Prize in Literature, a Lannan fellowship, and many other honors, and her work has been translated into twenty-one languages. She teaches in the creative writing program at New York University.



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