Reading Breathe by Joyce Carol Oates was a book I knew I needed to read once Jan was diagnosed. Despite the possibility that the book would trigger negative memories, I finally read Breathe. It was what I needed to read at this point in my journey. Ms. Oates wrote the book in 2019 after her husband, Charlie Gross, died. The novel is a story of love, loss, and loneliness. These are topics that I write about on this blog.
Just for Today, Keep it Simple!
Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 4 seconds
One breath, one step, one day, was all I could manage in the initial weeks after Jan died.
Slowly I have made progress and am optimistic that the new year will be sweet and one of change and growth.
I will never cease to love Jan and be loved by her.
As S.C. Lourie wrote,
Look at your life for all you have gained rather than lost.
Look at your path for everything you have got through rather than
everywhere you think you should be.Celebrate rather than criticize.
Experience rather than expect.
See how that goes, just for today.
Every day, I promise to remember what I gained from loving Jan, not the misery of the loss.
It seems easy to scribble those words on parchment, but focusing on love instead of loss is not effortless.
Just for today, I will keep it simple and love Jan with all my heart and soul.
The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.
When we heard Jan was coming home for hospice, I thought I was living on the edge of a precipice. I thought I was living one moment at a time. But I have learned life’s lesson that it is truly living one breath at a time. I was reminded of this by reading Joyce Carol […]
