Richard W. shared a stream on September 28, 2022

Flowers Convert 3B Into a Home

Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 34 seconds

Thanks to my friend Deb, I have made a giant step in making Apartment 3B my home!

I have all of the plants re-potted and back in my tiny dwelling!

Deb, a master gardener and a member of the Hanson Park Conservancy and the Green Thumb Garden Club, helped me select the plants, and she re-potted them.

Deb also recommended self-watering pots, making it easier for me to manage the plants and avoid drowning them.

Deb recommended a Swiss Cheese plant in front of the kitchen sink, which I will purchase shortly. I have a grow light that can assist the flower in flourishing.

I will be forever grateful to Deb for her patience, guidance, support, and friendship.

My goal since moving into Apartment 3B on July 31st was to make it homelike before the new year. Although I have more to do, I believe I have achieved the objective.

I understand that time travel is impossible, unlike in the Sea of Tranquility.

However, I daydream that Jan might travel thru time and space. Now, with the flowers, she would feel comfortable if she made a stopover in Apartment 3B and would be pleased to visit regularly.

If Jan did visit me, I understand I would not know it was her, so she did not alter the time continuum.

But her spirit will always be with me, and I want 3B to be our home, not mine alone.

Love will never die!

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Jan Lilien at Philadelphia Flower Show 2019

Am I Alone in Apartment 3B?

As I unpack in apartment 3B, I am alone, but I know Jan is still with me. I am having trouble finding places for all the remembrances of decades of love. Each item I unwrap opens the floodgates of a lifetime of love. It also reminds me of how fortunate I was and how Jan […]

Richard W. Brown August 2, 2022

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My random thoughts on love, grief, life and all things considered.

Walking for 1097 Days
For the past three years, I have been walking towards the future. I find joy in the little things that make up my daily routine, but sometimes, I feel a deep longing for companionship. […]
My Apolytus Moment
Despite the deep and abiding pain of missing my beloved wife daily, I have come to understand that it is essential that I continue living and finding joy in the present moment. […]
Flowers Everywhere
Memories of Jan's unwavering love and support continue to sustain me and provide me immeasurable comfort and strength during these trying times. It is her memories that help me to remain grounded and hopeful, even as I continue to struggle with the loss of my loved one. […]
Solar Eclipse of My Soul
The memories of the last total solar eclipse I saw in Oregon were bittersweet. They reminded me of what I had lost and still had to cherish, and I will forever hold onto those memories as a reminder of the beauty and fragility of life […]
Learning From Grief
Though grief was a challenging experience, I found the courage to move forward and learn more about myself and the world around me. As a result, I gained a greater appreciation for my resilience and growth potential as I navigated the world alone. […]

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Zenith Man

Read: February 2023

Zenith Man, Inheritance #4

by Jennifer Haigh

Tonight I read Zenith Man by Jennifer Haigh. A 911 call begins the story. A man reports his wife had died, but no one knew he had a wife. For thirty-two years, they had been married, and only one person had seen her, but only for a minute when she said: “supper was ready.” I read the first page and immediately found myself with a short page-turner that I could not stop reading. I recommend Zenith Man.

Actual events inspired this story. For many decades, many acquaintances of Jan and mine had no idea we were married. Once they found out, the response was, “we should have known as the two of you are perfect for each other.” But they knew we were married and had met both of us.

Being a widow, I found this phrase in the story emotional and very moving.

“She was a good woman,” Harold told Cob Krug. “I was lucky to have her. I promised to keep her in sickness and in health, and that’s what I did.”

Is there anything more that can summarize the love between two people?

I highly recommend Zenith Man, part of Inheritance, a collection of five stories about secrets, unspoken desires, and dangerous revelations between loved ones. Each Inheritance piece can be read or listened to in a single setting. By yourself, behind closed doors, or shared with someone you trust. Zenith Man is the fourth one in the series I have read. The previous three were Everything My Mother Taught Me, Can You Feel This?, and The Lion’s Den.

I have enjoyed all four and look forward to reading the final one.

Now that I have read Ms. Haigh’s short story, I have added her newest novel, Mercy Street, to my queue.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

Whatever had been going on inside the shuttered old house, the couple who lived there kept it to themselves. Among the locals, there’s only chilling speculation.

Neighbors are shocked when Harold Pardee reports his wife dead. No one even knew the eccentric TV repairman was married. Within hours, horrible rumors spread about what that poor woman must have endured for thirty years. Until the Pardees’ carefully guarded world is exposed. New York Times bestselling author Jennifer Haigh delivers an endearing short story about our misguided perception of strangers, the nature of love, and the need for secrets.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

The Vanishing Half

Read: September 2021

The Vanishing Half

by Brit Bennett

The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett was a true page-turner, and I did not want to stop reading it even when I got to the last page. I am not a fan of sequels, but if I was ever going to change my mind, this is the book I would want to read a sequel.

Ms. Bennett focuses on two twins who run away from home at age 16. They have grown up in Mallard, a fictional town in Louisiana. “In Mallard, nobody married dark,” Bennett writes starkly. Over time, its prejudices deepened as its population became lighter and lighter, “like a cup of coffee steadily diluted with cream.” The twins, with their “creamy skin, hazel eyes, wavy hair,” would have delighted the town’s founder. One of the women chooses to pass as white while the other does not.

The Vignes twin sisters will always be identical. But after growing up together in a small, southern black community and running away at age sixteen, it’s not just the shape of their daily lives that is different as adults, it’s everything: their families, their communities, their racial identities. Many years later, one sister lives with her black daughter in the same southern town she once tried to escape. The other passes for white, and her white husband knows nothing of her past. Still, even separated by so many miles and just as many lies, the fates of the twins remain intertwined. What will happen to the next generation, when their own daughters’ storylines intersect?

Weaving together multiple strands and generations of this family, from the Deep South to California, from the 1950s to the 1990s, Brit Bennett produces a story that is at once a riveting, emotional family story and a brilliant exploration of the American history of passing. Looking well beyond issues of race, The Vanishing Half considers the lasting influence of the past as it shapes a person’s decisions, desires, and expectations, and explores some of the multiple reasons and realms in which people sometimes feel pulled to live as something other than their origins.

The question of why people choose to live differently than their origins is one that I often ponder. Growing up in a small town and living in a metropolis raises questions for me as to what my life is now and what was once.

I strongly recommend this book.

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