Sunday, April 24, 2022, at 2 PM

On Sunday, April 24, 2022, at 2 pm in Hanson Park in Cranford, NJ, we held Celebrate Jan Lilien Day. We celebrated her life as we dedicate and break ground on a living memorial for her in the park.

Celebrate Jan Day was a success. One hundred friends joined our family and volunteers from the Hanson Park Conservancy to celebrate her life as we dedicate and break ground on a living memorial for her in the park.

Video clips of all of the speeches from Celebrate Jan Day are not available.

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Every Kiss With Jan Was Memorable!

Kissing Jan was a joy! Each kiss was memorable, but two were very special. These were the first and the last ones. Every day, I wish upon a star and pray that I might have one more kiss from Jan. Alas, it is impossible. But memories of those kisses are so real I can taste their sweetness.


The First Kiss – November 11, 1973

Richard, we are leaving,” said Mark, my co-worker and friend. His voice came through loud and clear into the pod that had surrounded Jan and me since we arrived at her party. I thought Jan and I were alone and not at a noisy party until Mark spoke. We talked and laughed and truly enjoyed each other’s company.

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Sharing Jan’s Love
Because Love Never Dies

“Why are you giving her love away?” My answer is that I am not giving it away. What I am doing is sharing her love. The love they receive increases as they share it with others. Ultimately, that love returns to me, and I have more of Jan’s passion for life that I can re-share.

The idea of sharing her love resulted from a poem – Merrit Malloy’s Epitaph – that Jan and I both liked. It was read at her funeral and will be at mine. The last stanza explains why I share her love to preserve her memory and legacy.

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By Climbing the Second Mountain Jan Was Able to Inspire and Empower Others

How does one become a humanitarian? Is it in our DNA and Humanitarians are born that way? Is there a curriculum they study to earn a degree as a humanitarian? Is it the job where you work? Is it because of the times in which one lives? Is being a child of the sixties make one a humanitarian?

Having spent a lifetime striving to be a humanitarian and living with one for the last forty-eight years, the answer to all of those queries is no. One becomes a humanitarian by choosing to live and specifically which mountain they decide to climb.

Reading The Second Mountain: The Quest for a Moral Life by David Brooks provided me with the clarity to understand how Jan Lilien became a Humanitarian and why I am on the correct path. 

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The Jan Lilien Education Fund!

Trouble the Saints

Read: January 2022

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Trouble the Saints

by Alaya Dawn Johnson

Trouble the Saints by Alaya Dawn Johnson is one of NPR’s Books We Love from 2020. The dangerous magic of The Night Circus meets the powerful historical exploration of The Underground Railroad in this timely and unsettling novel, set against the darkly glamorous backdrop of New York City at the dawn of WWII. Amidst the whir of city life, a girl from Harlem is drawn into the glittering underworld of Manhattan, where she’s hired to use her knives to strike fear amongst its most dangerous denizens.

The book is written in three sections with different protagonists and voices. Phyllis, or Pea as her friends call her, is a black assassin for a white mob boss narrates the first section of the book. Her saint’s hands are the ability to use knives to commit murder. She can also pass as white as Phyllis, but she is a black woman from Harlem as Pea. The section she narrates is difficult at first to follow as she attempts to deal with the consequences of her actions. Can the past ever be the past?

Dev, Indian and Phyllis’s lover, narrates the second section. He is an undercover cop who protects her and helps her free herself from the mob boss. This section is located in the Hudson Valley and highlights the tensions before the war between whites and non-whites.

The third protagonist, Tamara, narrates this section. The war separates Phyllis and Dev. Phyllis is pregnant, and Dev and Tamara’s love interest are serving in the military. This section brings together the threads and reminds us that the past is never the past.

As Goodreads summarizes the book,

But the ghosts from her past are always by her side—and history has appeared on her doorstep to threaten the people she loves most.

Can one woman ever sacrifice enough to save an entire community?

Trouble the Saints is a dazzling, daring novel—a magical love story, a compelling chronicle of interracial tension, and an altogether brilliant and deeply American saga.

I recommend this book and encourage all readers to read it to the end.

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Black Sun

Read: November 2021

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Black Sun – Between the Earth and Sky

by Rebecca Roanhorse

Black Sun by Rebecca Roanhorse.  Black Sun is the first book in the Between Earth and Sky trilogy, inspired by the civilizations of the Pre-Columbian Americas and woven into a tale of celestial prophecies, political intrigue, and forbidden magic.

I have always enjoyed fantasy novels like Black Sun, and this is the first one set in the Pre-Columbian Americas.

A god will return
When the earth and sky converge
Under the black sun

In the holy city of Tova, the winter solstice is usually a time for celebration and renewal, but this year, it coincides with a solar eclipse, a rare celestial event proscribed by the Sun Priest as an unbalancing of the world.

Meanwhile, a ship launches from a distant city bound for Tova and set to arrive on the solstice. The captain of the ship, Xiala, is a disgraced Teek whose song can calm the waters around her as quickly as it can warp a man’s mind. Her ship carries one passenger. Described as harmless, the passenger, Serapio, is a young man, blind, scarred, and cloaked in destiny. As Xiala well knows, when a man is described as harmless, he usually ends up being a villain.

Will Serapio be harmless or a villain? The answer, my friend, will be known when you read this book or perhaps the second one in the trilogy.

Before meeting and falling forever in love with Jan, I had dreamed of the life of an American Studies professor. Thousands of students are relieved to know I did not pursue that life. If I had opened that door, an area of focus would have been on Pre-Columbian Americas.

I recommend this book and will read the next two in the Between Earth and Sky trilogy.

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Read: September 2025

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Buckeye: A Novel

by Patrick Ryan

Buckeye: A Novel” by Patrick Ryan takes readers on a captivating journey through a single town, where the lives of two families intertwine amidst a life-altering secret. With its sweeping narrative and intimate moments, the story delves deeply into the human experience, offering rich insights and a warmth that resonates with anyone seeking love, goodness, and yearning for connection.

In Bonhomie, Ohio, a stolen moment of passion, sparked in the exuberant aftermath of the Allied victory in Europe, binds Cal Jenkins, a man wounded not in war but by his inability to serve in it, to Margaret Salt, a woman trying to obscure her past. Cal’s wife, Becky, possesses a spiritual gift: she is a seer who can conjure the dead, helping families reconnect with those they’ve lost. Margaret’s husband, Felix, is serving on a Navy cargo ship, out of harm’s way—until a telegram suggests that the unthinkable might have happened.

Later, as the country reconstructs in the postwar boom, a secret grows in Bonhomie—but nothing stays buried forever in a small town. Against the backdrop of some of the most transformative decades in modern America, the consequences of that long-ago encounter ripple through the next generation of both families, compelling them to reexamine who they thought they were and what the future might hold.


Patrick Ryan is the author of the story collections The Dream Life of Astronauts and Send Me. The Dream Life of Astronauts was named one of the Best Books of the Year by the St. Louis Times-Dispatch, Literary Hub, Refinery29, and Electric Literature, and it was also longlisted for The Story Prize.

His work has been featured in The Best American Short Stories and the anthology Tales of Two Cities, among other publications. Ryan is the former associate editor of Granta and currently serves as the editor-in-chief of One Story. He resides in New York City.



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The Hidden Habits of Genius

Read: September 2019

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The Hidden Habits of Genius

by Craig Wright

The Hidden Habits of Genius: Beyond Talent, IQ, and Grit―Unlocking the Secrets of Greatness by Craig Wright, Ph.D., I got through my membership in One Day University.

Dr. Wright raises many important questions as he analyses fourteen (14) critical traits of genius. Professor Craig Wright, creator of Yale University’s famous “Genius Course,” explores what we can learn from brilliant minds that have changed the world.

What we often presume about a genius does not match reality. Among other interesting observations, Dr. Wright reminds the reader that Picasso could not pass a fourth-grade math test, and Steve Jobs’s high school GPA was 2.65. He questions why to teach children to behave and play by the rules when transformative geniuses do not.

Examining the lives of transformative individuals ranging from Charles Darwin and Marie Curie to Leonardo Da Vinci and Andy Warhol to Toni Morrison and Elon Musk, Wright identifies more than a dozen drivers of genius, characteristics and patterns of behavior common to great minds throughout history. He argues that genius is about more than intellect and work ethic and that the famed “eureka” moment is a Hollywood fiction. Brilliant insights that change the world are never sudden, but rather, they are the result of unique modes of thinking and lengthy gestation.

I found the book to be a fascinating read and raised more questions for future thought and reading. Professor Wright argues that the habits of mind that produce great thinking and discovery can be actively learned and cultivated. In the book, he explains how. He notes that reading the book will not make you a genius but can “make you more strategic, creative, and successful, and, ultimately, happier.

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Weather

Read: March 2022

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Weather: A Novel

by Jenny Offil

Weather: A Novel by Jenny Offil was a book that I was confused and uncertain if I wanted to finish for the first few pages. I am delighted that I did, and I highly recommend this book. Its brief diary-like dispatches about life in our time when we sense that we may all be doomed to a climate catastrophe made this a book I truly enjoyed reading. The subtext of the rise of right-wing strongmen in the USA and abroad adds to the crisis her dispatches describe.

Her Obligatory Note of Hope challenges all of us to engage in solutions instead of accepting doom.

How can we contribute to the common good? There are people all over the world trying to answer these questions. In big ways but also in small ways. In grand leaps but also in fits and starts.

I always thought it was ridiculous to try and fight for social change when I couldn’t even get my own house in order. How could a meat-eating, plane-flying, march-hating person like me ever find a place in the climate justice movement? But then I started to read about all the different ways ordinary people were refusing to give into fatalism and were exploring the possibilities of what they could do, what they might fight for in this half-ruined world of ours.

There were saints among these accidental activists, but also stone-cold hypocrites like me. Slowly, I began to see collective action as the antidote to my dithering and despair.

There’s a way in for everyone. Aren’t you tired of all this fear and dread?

Goodreads provides an overview of the book if you are not yet convinced to read it.

 Lizzie Benson is a very relatable woman who slid into her job as a librarian without a traditional degree. But this gives her a vantage point from which to practice her other calling: a fake shrink. She has tended to her God-haunted mother and her recovering addict brother for years. They have both stabilized for the moment, but Lizzie has little chance to spend her new free time with her husband and son before her old mentor, Sylvia Liller, proposes. She wants to hire Lizzie to answer the mail she receives: left-wingers worried about climate change and right-wingers concerned about the decline of western civilization. Sylvia has become famous for her prescient podcast, Hell and High Water, and wants to hire Lizzie to answer the mail she receives: from left-wingers worried about climate change and right wingers worried about the decline of western civilization.

As Lizzie dives into this polarized world, she begins to wonder what it means to keep tending your own garden once you’ve seen the flames beyond its walls. When her brother becomes a father and Sylvia a recluse, Lizzie is forced to address the limits of her own experience. But she still tries to save everyone, using everything she’s learned about empathy and despair, conscience and collusion, floundering the library stacks her years of wa.. And all the while the voices of the city keep floating in—funny, disturbing, and increasingly mad.

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Hurricane Season

Read: September 2024

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Hurricane Season

by Fernanda Melchor

Hurricane Season‘ by Fernanda Melchor, translated by Sophie Hughes, is a literary gem acknowledged by the New York Times as one of the 100 Best Books of the 21st Century. The story opens with the discovery of a dead witch in a village, leading to an investigation into her murder. As the novel unfolds, it offers a unique perspective on the lives of the villagers, each narrating the story from their point of view.

This unique portrayal of the characters, each with flaws and virtues, uncovers new details and acts of depravity. Despite the characters being seen as irredeemable, Melchor extracts some shred of humanity from them, creating a lasting portrait of a doomed Mexican village. This deep connection to Mexican culture is a significant aspect of the novel that will surely resonate with readers interested in this topic.

Hurricane Season” draws significant literary inspiration from Roberto Bolaño‘s “2666” and Faulkner‘s novels. Like these works, it is set in a world filled with mythology and actual violence that seeps into the surroundings, creating a connection that makes it more terrifying the deeper you explore it.

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