Groundhog Day

Groundhog Day

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 40 seconds

Most days since Jan died are so similar to the previous day that I feel like I am living the same day repeatedly, like Phil Connors in Groundhog Day. It’s not that every day is identical. It is more that each is so similar that it is difficult to distinguish one from the other. This week, I felt it was a day later than it was. Is today Friday or Saturday?

Every day was unique and special when Jan worked in treatment from home. Will I ever have days like that again?

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My Chrysalis Moment

Reflecting on the past can sometimes perplex us, struggling to comprehend what happened and why. The initial months of 2019 were a trying time for me when I relinquished full-time work and found myself at a loss for purpose. My wife's lymphoma diagnosis necessitated my role as a full-time caregiver, and I embraced my newfound responsibilities with empathy and devotion. Four and a half years later, I must face the significant questions I had set aside to tend to my wife. However, the experience of caring for her and eventually becoming a widow has fortified me, making me feel more confident and capable of tackling these challenges head-on.

When I retired, I struggled with the same questions I faced after my wife passed - who am I, what do I want, and what should I do next? However, my experience as a caregiver provided me with valuable insights and answers. Rabbi Renee taught me the importance of giving love away, a critical lesson that helped me better understand myself and my desires. As a result, I am confident about moving forward.

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The Jan Lilien Education Fund!

Groundhog Day
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All Fours: A Novel

Read: May 2024

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All Fours: A Novel

by Miranda July

Today, I started reading All Fours: A Novel by Miranda July. A semi-famous artist announces her plan to drive cross-country from LA to NY. Thirty minutes after leaving her husband and child at home, she spontaneously exits the freeway, checks into a nondescript motel, and immerses herself in an entirely different journey.

Miranda July’s second novel, a testament to her unique approach to fiction, confirms the brilliance of her storytelling. With July’s wry voice, perfect comic timing, unabashed curiosity about human intimacy, and palpable delight in pushing boundaries, All Fours tells the story of one woman’s quest for a new kind of freedom. Part absurd entertainment, part tender reinvention of the sexual, romantic, and domestic life of a forty-five-year-old female artist, All Fours transcends expectation while excavating our beliefs about life as a woman. Once again, July hijacks the familiar and turns it into something new and thrillingly, profoundly alive.



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In Five Years

Read: September 2021

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In Five Years

by Rebecca Serle

In Five Years by Rebecca Serle is a good, quick read. It is an “unforgettable love story that reminds us of the power of loyalty, friendship, and the unpredictable nature of destiny.”

The protagonist Dannie Kohan is a Type A lawyer who has her life planned out by the numbers. Everything she believes will happen according to her plan. But life sometimes throws us a curveball.

She applies for the job she has always wanted, and her boyfriend proposes to her. Everything is going according to her plan. She returns home believing that life is going as planned and falls asleep.

But when she wakes up, she’s suddenly in a different apartment, with a different ring on her finger, and beside a very different man. The television news is on in the background, and she can make out the scrolling date. It’s the same night—December 15—but 2025, five years in the future.

There are twists and turns, including her best friend introducing her new boyfriend, who happens to be the man she was with briefly in 2025. Her friends’ struggle with and eventual death from Ovarian cancer forces Dannie to confront life as is. Her friend reminds her that she has never truly experienced love and needs to stop controlling her life and those around her.

In five years is a question I am asking myself. Where will I be five years after Jan’s death?

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Watching Over Her

Read: January 2026

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Watching Over Her

by Jean-Baptiste Andrea

Watching Over Her,” a novel by the acclaimed French author and Prix Goncourt winner Jean-Baptiste Andrea, is described by The New York Times as a “sprawling fresco and star-crossed love story.” The narrative follows a dwarf and talented sculptor as he reflects on the moments in his life that inspired his mysteriously powerful masterpiece. This book is perfect for readers who enjoyed “Martyr!” and “The Covenant of Water.”

In an Italian monastery, a sculptor named Mimo lies on his deathbed. For decades, he has lived among the monks who watch over his masterpiece, an arresting statue that haunts all who see it. During his final hours, he reveals his life story: his impoverished childhood, brutal apprenticeship, and, most importantly, his meeting with Viola Orsini, the only daughter of a powerful and dangerous aristocratic family.

Mimo and Viola are instantly drawn to one another, viewing themselves as outsiders—Mimo, for his dwarfism, Viola, for her ability to remember everything she has ever read or experienced. Together, they traverse the unrest of the twentieth century, from the rise of fascism to the violence of the world wars. While Mimo becomes a celebrated artist, Viola chases her own dreams of becoming an emancipated woman. Over the decades, they will lose and find each other time and again, but never will they give up on the love they share.

Immersive and full of heart, Mimo’s adventures are ribald and hilarious, challenging conventions of his day. Jean-Baptiste Andrea’s Prix Goncourt–winning novel has captivated audiences worldwide and is now available to readers in English for the first time, thanks to Frank Wynne’s wonderfully vivid translation.


Jean-Baptiste Andrea is a writer, screenwriter, and director. His novel Watching Over Her won the Prix Goncourt, France’s most prestigious literary prize. He is also the author of Ma Reine, A Hundred Million Years and a Day, and Devils and Saints.

Frank Wynne is an Irish literary translator, writer, and editor known for his translations of various French and Hispanic authors, including Michel Houellebecq, Patrick Modiano, Javier Cercas, and Virginie Despentes. Over his career, which has spanned more than twenty-five years, he has won the IMPAC Dublin Literary Award twice and the Independent Foreign Fiction Prize.

Additionally, he has received the Scott Moncrieff Prize three times and the Premio Valle Inclán twice. Most recently, his translation of “The Annual Banquet of the Gravediggers’ Guild” by Mathias Énard won the 2024 French-American Prize. Wynne has also edited two significant anthologies: “Found in Translation: 100 of the Finest Short Stories Ever Translated” and “Queer: LGBT Writing from Ancient Times to Yesterday.”



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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The Hunter: A Novel

Read: March 2024

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The Hunter: A Novel

by Tana French

Today, I began reading “The Hunter: A Novel” by Tana French, often called the Queen of Irish crime fiction. The story takes place in a small village in the West of Ireland during a hot summer. Two men arrive, one returning home and the other seeking riches. However, one of them is also seeking death.

Cal Hooper is a retired Chicago police officer who moved to rural Ireland for a peaceful life. He has built a relationship with a local woman named Lena and has been mentoring Trey Reddy, a troubled teenager on a better path. But when Trey’s long-lost father returns, accompanied by an English millionaire and a plan to find gold in the townland, everything they have built is threatened. Cal and Lena are willing to do whatever it takes to protect Trey, but Trey is not interested in protection. What she wants is revenge.

This novel, written by the acclaimed author described by The New York Times as “in a class by herself,” tells a nuanced and atmospheric tale about what we are willing to do for our loved ones, what we will do for revenge, and what we may have to sacrifice when the two collide.

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Grief Is the Thing with Feathers

Read: May 2026

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Grief Is the Thing with Feathers

Max Porter‘s extraordinary debut, “Grief Is the Thing with Feathers,” is a unique blend of novella, polyphonic fable, and essay about grief. Combining compassion with a bold writing style, it delivers a powerful impact. Filled with sharp humor and deep insights, this haunting and original work introduces an important new talent. The book will be released as a major motion picture titled “The Thing with Feathers,” starring Benedict Cumberbatch.

Here he is, husband and father, scruffy romantic, a shambolic scholar–a man adrift in the wake of his wife’s sudden, accidental death. And there are his two sons, who, like him, struggle in their London apartment to face the unbearable sadness that has engulfed them. The father imagines a future of well-meaning visitors and emptiness, while the boys wander, savage and unsupervised.

In this moment of violent despair, they are visited by Crow–antagonist, trickster, goad, protector, therapist, and babysitter. This self-described “sentimental bird,” at once wild and tender, who “finds humans dull except in grief,” threatens to stay with the wounded family until they no longer need him. As weeks turn to months and the pain of loss lessens with the balm of memories, Crow’s efforts are rewarded, and the little unit of three begins to recover: Dad resumes his book about the poet Ted Hughes; the boys get on with it, grow up.


Max Porter is a publishing professional who lives in South London with his wife and children. “Grief Is the Thing with Feathers” is his debut book.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books I’ve personally vetted for quality and enjoyment. Supporting these selections not only helps me continue to provide you with personalized recommendations but also ensures you have access to meaningful stories that enrich your life. Your support truly makes a difference in helping me share more books and insights with you!


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Ghostroots: Stories

Read: October 2024

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Ghostroots: Stories

by ’Pemi Aguda

Today, I started reading Ghostroots: Stories by ‘Pemi Aguda, a finalist for the 2024 National Book Award for Fiction. This collection features twelve imaginative stories set in Lagos, Nigeria, in which ‘Pemi Aguda explores the tension between our desire to be individuals and the influence of our past. One of the stories, “Breastmilk,” was shortlisted for the 2024 Caine Prize for African Writing.

The story “Manifest” depicts a woman who sees the ghost of her abusive mother in her daughter’s face, which leads to her daughter exhibiting destructive behavior. In “Breastmilk,” a wife forgives her husband for infidelity. Still, she later struggles with producing milk for her newborn, feeling like she’s failed to uphold her mother’s feminist values and doubts her ability as a mother. Things Boys Do” follows a trio of fathers who sense something unnatural about their infant sons, leading to their lives falling apart as they fear their sons are the cause of their troubles. Lastly, “24, Alhaji Williams Street” tells the story of a teenage boy living in the shadow of a mysterious disease that’s killing the boys on his street.

These stories in “Ghostroots” delve into the emotional and physical worlds, unveiling the profound impact of family, myth, tradition, gender, and modernity in Nigerian society. Pemi Aguda’s storytelling, infused with empathy and humor, showcases her as a significant new literary talent. Her deep understanding of human emotions and thorough exploration of these societal influences will leave you feeling enlightened and informed, eager to explore more of her work.



When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!


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