Richard W. shared a stream on May 15, 2022
Cello and Violin Concertos Ease Grief's Hold on Me

Cello and Violin Concertos Ease My Grief

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 47 seconds
April Showers Set the Stage for Jan's Birthday

Artwork graciously provided by Emi Sato.

Last night, my widow friend Betsy and I attended a performance by the Bergen Philharmonic Orchestra. Wendy, a mutual friend who is also a widow, is the concertmaster. The 2019 and 2021 winners of the Young Artist Competition performed in the two concertos, which were a pleasure for my body and soul.  The symphony was superb.

The orchestra performed at its best.

The next concert is on November 5th. Hopefully, more of my widowed friends can attend and enjoy live music.

My grief was so minimal for a few moments that I thought I was at the concert with Jan.

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Ten Alternate Words for Widow

Ten Alternate Words for Widow

On January 3rd, I wrote an article titled "Why Am I Still Defined as a Widow?". In the article, I expressed my confusion and frustration over being referred to as a widow despite having moved on from the loss of my spouse. I explained how I have chosen to live life to the fullest with meaning and purpose and have discovered the transformative power of loving and being loved. I also mentioned that I play many roles in life, including that of a father, grandfather, community activist, advocate, and observant Jew. I am a complex and multifaceted individual. Therefore, I requested the reader to consider me as such.

My friend and reader of my blog, Mark Annett, read my blog post. He wrote, "Your quest for a new term for the widow was noble. So, I shared your post with ChatGPT for some help. Here is what it came up with…

Richard W. Brown January 19, 2024

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Richard W. Brown
Cello and Violin Concertos Ease Grief's Hold on Me

Stand by Me

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 47 seconds

WNYC’s New Standards was on the radio while driving home in light rain. The first song was Ben E. King’s Stand by Me. It was not on the top of the music charts for either Jan or me, but it was a clear message that Jan is still with me and standing by me. 

When the night has come
And the land is dark
And the moon is the only light we’ll see
No, I won’t be afraid
Oh, I won’t be afraid
Just as long as you stand, stand by me

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Cello and Violin Concertos Ease Grief's Hold on Me
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Cello and Violin Concertos Ease Grief's Hold on Me
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Everything My Mother Taught Me

Read: December 2022

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Everything My Mother Taught Me

by Alice Hoffman

I read Everything My Mother Taught Me by Alice Hoffman on the last day of 2022 as I was alone, and I have always admired Ms. Hoffman’s prose. The short story is a haunting short story of loyalty and betrayal, a young woman in early 1900s Massachusetts discovers that in navigating her treacherous coming-of-age, she must find her voice first. I know it is a book that Jan would have enjoyed reading, and I highly recommend it.

Alice Hoffman’s Everything My Mother Taught Me is part of Inheritance’s five stories about secrets, unspoken desires, and dangerous revelations between loved ones. Each piece can be read or listened to in a single setting. By yourself, behind closed doors, or shared with someone you trust. I plan to read more of this series in 2023.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview.

New York Times bestselling author of The Rules of Magic Alice Hoffman crafts a beautiful, heart-wrenching short story. For fatefully observant, Adeline, growing up, carries an ominous warning from her adulterous mother: don’t say a word. Adeline vows never to speak again. Her only secret. After her mother takes a housekeeping job at a  But that’s not lighthouse off the tip of Cape Ann, a local woman vanishes. The key to the mystery lies with Adeline, the silent witness.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Heartwood

Read: April 2025

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Heartwood: A Novel

by Amity Gaige

Today, I embarked on the journey of Heartwood by Amity Gaige. This novel unfolds a gripping narrative as a search and rescue team races against time to find an experienced hiker who mysteriously disappears on the Appalachian Trail in Maine. The suspense of the search for Valerie is palpable, drawing you into the story with great literary ambition and love at its core.

In the heart of the Maine woods, an experienced Appalachian Trail hiker goes missing. She is forty-two-year-old Valerie Gillis, who has vanished 200 miles from her final destination. Alone in the wilderness, Valerie’s emotional struggle is palpable as she pours her thoughts into fractured, poetic letters to her mother, battling the elements and struggling to keep hoping.

At the heart of the investigation is Beverly, the determined Maine State Game Warden tasked with finding Valerie, who leads the search on the ground. Meanwhile, Lena, a seventy-six-year-old birdwatcher in a Connecticut retirement community, becomes an unexpected armchair detective. What’s unique about this narrative is that a puzzle emerges between these compelling narratives, intensifying the frantic search, as Valerie’s disappearance may not be accidental.

Heartwood is a “gem of a thousand facets—suspenseful, transporting, tender, and ultimately soul-mending” (Megan Majumdar, New York Times bestselling author of A Burning). It tells the story of a lost hiker’s odyssey and is a moving rendering of each character’s interior journey. The mystery inspires more significant questions about how we get lost and how we are found.

Amity Gaige is the author of four previous novels: O My Darling, The Folded World, Schroder, Sea Wife, a 2020 New York Times Notable Book, and a Mark Twain American Voice Award finalist. Schroder was also a New York Times Notable Book and the best book of 2013 according to The Washington Post and The Wall Street Journal, and was shortlisted for the UK’s Folio Prize in 2014. Her work has been translated into eighteen languages. In 2018, Amity was awarded a Guggenheim Fellowship in Fiction. She lives with her family in West Hartford, Connecticut, and teaches creative writing at Yale.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!

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Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow: A Novel

Read: July 2024

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Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow: A Novel

by Gabrielle Zevin

I delved into the pages of “Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow: A Novel” by Gabrielle Zevin. The narrative unfolds the lives of Sam and Sadie, two college friends who evolve into creative partners in video game design. Their journey is a tapestry of fame, joy, tragedy, duplicity, and a form of immortality, all woven into a unique love story that captivated me like no other.

This love story uniquely portrays the challenges and triumphs of a relationship in the context of their shared creative endeavors.

On a bitter-cold day in December of his junior year at Harvard, Sam Masur exits a subway car and sees Sadie Green amid the hordes of people waiting on the platform. He calls her name. For a moment, she pretends she hasn’t heard him, but then, she turns, and a game begins: a legendary collaboration that will launch them to stardom.

These friends, who have been close since childhood, take bold steps, borrow money, and seek favors. Even before they graduate from college, they have birthed their first blockbuster, Ichigo. In a blink, the world is at their feet. Sam and Sadie, not yet twenty-five, are shining with brilliance, success, and wealth. But these attributes can’t shield them from their emotional rollercoaster of creative aspirations and the heartbreaks that come with it.

Spanning thirty years, from Cambridge, Massachusetts, to Venice Beach, California, and lands in between and far beyond, Gabrielle Zevin‘s Tomorrow, Tomorrow, and Tomorrow provides a profound exploration of the diverse nature of identity, disability, failure, the redemptive possibilities in play, and above all, our deep-seated need to connect: to be loved and to love. It’s a journey that will make you reflect on your life and relationships.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

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The Ten Year Affair

Read: November 2025

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The Ten Year Affair

by Erin Somers

“The Ten Year Affair” by Erin Somers is a witty and emotionally charged exploration of marriage, family life, and the paths not taken, ultimately asking: Do we really want our fantasies to come true? This hilariously sharp novel weaves a sliding doors narrative around a chance meeting between two young parents, both happily married (just not to each other), that sparks a will-they-won’t-they romance—perfect for fans of “Big Swiss” and “Acts of Service.”

When Cora meets Sam at a baby group in their small town, the chemistry between them is undeniable. Both are content in their marriages and have two kids, and neither sees themselves as the type to engage in an affair. Yet, their connection deepens, and as their lives intertwine, the romantic tension becomes all-consuming—until their worlds unravel into two parallel timelines. In one, they pursue their feelings; in the other, they resist.

As reality splits, the everyday details of Cora’s life—her unfulfilling marketing job, her daughter’s newfound fascination with the afterlife, and her husband’s obsession with podcasts about the history of rope—gain fresh perspective. The intersecting and diverging timelines blur the boundaries between reality and fantasy, questioning what might have been and what truly matters.

Erin Somers is a reporter and news editor at Publishers Lunch. Her debut novel, “Stay Up with Hugo Best“, was recognized as a Vogue Best Book of the Year in 2019. Her work has appeared in esteemed publications such as The New Yorker, The Paris Review, The New York Times Book Review, The New Republic, New York magazine, The Atlantic, Esquire, GQ, and Best American Short Stories, among others.

Somers has received an Emerging Writer Fellowship from the NYC Center for Fiction, a fellowship from the Millay Colony, and was a finalist for a National Magazine Award in 2020. She resides in New York’s Hudson Valley with her family.

Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!

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The Jackal's Mistress

Read: March 2025

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The Jackal’s Mistress

by Chris Bohjalian

Today, I dove into “The Jackal’s Mistress” by Chris Bohjalian, a gripping Civil War love story inspired by a true friendship that defied the odds. It follows the wife of a missing Confederate soldier as she stumbles upon a wounded Yankee officer. With the battlefield’s tension looming, she faces a heart-wrenching choice: How much is she willing to risk for the life of a stranger?

Written by a New York Times bestselling author renowned for captivating historical novels like “Hour of the Witch” and “The Sandcastle Girls,” this tale promises an unforgettable journey of love and sacrifice.

Virginia, 1864—Libby Steadman’s husband has been away so long that she can barely remember his voice in her dreams. While she longs for him at night, fearing he is dead in a Union prison camp, her days are spent running a gristmill with her teenage niece, a hired hand, and his wife. The Confederate Army requisitions all the grain they produce. It’s a precarious life in the Shenandoah Valley, a region that frequently changes hands, with control shifting back and forth between North and South. Libby wakes each morning expecting to see her land transformed into a battlefield.

Then, Libby discovers a gravely injured Union officer left for dead in a neighbor’s house, his hand and leg bones shattered. Captain Jonathan Weybridge of the Vermont Brigade is her enemy, but he is also in dire need. Libby faces a terrible decision: should she leave him to die alone, or should she risk treason and try to nurse him back to health? If she succeeds, will she attempt to secretly bring him across Union lines in hopes of negotiating a trade for news about her husband?

“The Jackal’s Mistress” is a vivid and sweeping story of two people navigating the boundaries of love and humanity amid a backdrop of brutal violence. This heart-stopping novel is based on a largely unknown piece of American history and showcases one of our greatest storytellers.

Chris Bohjalian is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of twenty-five books, including “The Princess of Las Vegas,” “The Lioness,” “Hour of the Witch,” “Midwives,” and “The Flight Attendant,” which has been adapted into a limited series on Max starring Kaley Cuoco.

His other notable works include “The Red Lotus,” “The Guest Room,” “Close Your Eyes, Hold Hands,” “The Sandcastle Girls,” “Skeletons at the Feast,” and “The Double Bind.” Several of his novels, including “Secrets of Eden,” “Midwives,” and “Past the Bleachers,” have been adapted into movies. Bohjalian’s works have been translated into more than thirty-five languages. In addition to writing novels, he is also a playwright, with works such as “The Club,” “Wingspan,” and “Midwives.

He resides in Vermont and can be found online at chrisbohjalian.com and on Facebook, Instagram, X, TikTok, Litsy, and Goodreads.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

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We Were Eight Years in Power

Read: September 2020

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We Were Eight Years in Power

by Ta-Nehisi Coates

We Were Eight Years in Power by Ta-Nehisi Coates is a collection featuring the landmark essay The Case for Reparations he wrote for The Atlantic. Even though I am a subscriber to The Atlantic and have read many of the pieces, this is a must-read book as it reflects on race, Barack Obama’s presidency, and its jarring aftermath, including the election of Donald Trump.

We were eight years in power as the lament of Reconstruction-era black politicians as the American experiment in multiracial democracy ended with the return of white supremacist rule in the South. In this sweeping collection of new and selected essays, Ta-Nehisi Coates explores the tragic echoes of that history in our own time: the unprecedented election of a black president followed by a vicious backlash that fueled the election of the man Coates argues is America’s first white president.

But the story of these present-day eight years is not just about presidential politics. This book also examines the new voices, ideas, and movements for justice that emerged over this period and the effects of the persistent, haunting shadow of our nation’s old and unreconciled history. Coates powerfully examines the events of the Obama era from his intimate and revealing perspective:” the point of view of a young writer who begins the journey in an unemployment office in Harlem and ends it in the Oval Office, interviewing a president.

We Were Eight Years in Power features Coatesa’s iconic essays first published in The Atlantic, including Fear of a Black President, The Case for Reparations, and The Black Family in the Age of Mass Incarceration, along with eight fresh essays that revisit each year of the Obama administration through Coate’s own experiences, observations, and intellectual development, capped by a bracingly original assessment of the election that fully illuminated the tragedy of the Obama era. We Were Eight Years in Power is a vital account of modern America, from one of the definitive voices of this historic moment.

I recommend this book to all readers.

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