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50th Wedding Anniversary

Estimated reading time: 11 minutes, 59 seconds
Jan Lilien and Richard Brown, Wedding Day, August 9, 1975

Jan Lilien and Richard Brown, Wedding Day, August 9, 1975

Thanks for Reading My Posts and Supporting My Journey

Hello, dear reader! If you enjoyed this post, you can explore the story of how Jan and I first met, along with our wedding day. There is so much more to share about our love story! I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below this post, or feel free to contact me directly. Happy reading!

Hope

While I don’t believe in genies, imagining one during my morning walks inspires me! If I had three wishes, I would passionately wish for world peace, as well as solutions to end hunger and homelessness in our communities.

Fifty-one months ago, if I had a third wish left, I might have been tempted to ask to relive my relationship from beginning to end over and over again—not just once, but for a Groundhog Life.

Now, I realize that I can achieve this by recording my memories of those days and sharing them with you. As the Serenity Prayer reminds us,

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Although I can’t change the past or bring my wife back, I have come to understand the immense power of personal growth in shaping my future. Every day, I strive to become a better person. When faced with the choice between doing good or feeling good, I wholeheartedly choose to do good. I recognize that this journey can be challenging, but I am committed to living a meaningful and purposeful life with every moment I have. Your thoughts and support mean a great deal to me, as we are all on this journey of growth and change together.

Thank you for being a part of my journey. Your presence and support mean the world to me!

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Whale Fall: A Novel

Read: July 2024

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Whale Fall: A Novel

by Elizabeth O'Connor

I have started reading “Whale Fall: A Novel” by Elizabeth O’Connor. With its unique blend of loss, isolation, folklore, and the journey of self-discovery, this debut novel offers a compelling narrative set in 1938 on a remote Welsh island. The story is catalyzed by the arrival of a dead whale, a powerful symbol that sets the stage for the characters’ journeys.

The story revolves around Manod, a young woman who has spent her entire life on the island. Despite their island home’s harsh yet stunning surroundings, Manod yearns to explore life beyond it, a desire that will resonate with many readers.

As two English ethnographers arrive to study the island’s culture, Manod sees it as a potential escape from her community. However, her growing involvement with them triggers a profound internal conflict. She grapples with the dilemma of pursuing her desires or remaining loyal to her community. This struggle resonates with the universal human experience, making it a compelling read for many.

‘Whale Fall‘ vividly portrays the tensions that surface when one person’s aspirations threaten the unity of a community. O’Connor’s narrative skillfully depicts the community and Manod on the brink, forced to confront a world that seems to infringe upon them. This evokes a sense of admiration for O’Connor’s storytelling prowess, making it a must-read for literary fiction enthusiasts.

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Finding Peace, One Piece at a Time

Read: September 2021

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Finding Peace, One Piece at a Time

by Rachel Blythe Kodanaz

Finding Peace, One Piece at a Time by Rachel Blythe Kodanaz is a book I wish I had long before Jan died. It provides helpful information on maintaining an organized lifestyle and handling a loved one’s possessions.

Having lost almost everything I had except for the clothes on my back after a house fire in 1972, I thought I had adopted a view that possessions were not significant. With Jan’s death, the truth is that she and I had collected essential possessions, and now it was my responsibility to decide what to do with them.

Rachel’s book is a practical guide, offering a comprehensive understanding of the significance of possessions and a step-by-step plan to manage them. Chapter 3, in particular, is a treasure trove of practical advice, focusing on Building Your Game Plan: The Ten Essentials and covering all the crucial topics – triggers, building a team, and creating a timeline, among others.

Magic of the Six Piles is a well-designed plan that will help most of us confront the possessions of our loved ones. The piles are:

  1. Keep
  2. Share
  3. Donate
  4. Sell
  5. Dispose
  6. Ponder

Having absorbed the book’s wisdom, I am ready to transition from contemplation to action. This is how I sort my wife’s possessions into six piles. I am optimistic that it will also help me streamline my possessions, making books my trusted company more accessible for my sons.

Ms. Kodanaz has presented at my bereavement groups and has been an inspiration. She has also encouraged me to write about my love for Jan in a journal.

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A Good Neighborhood

Read: September 2021

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A Good Neighborhood

by Therese Anne Fowler

A Good Neighborhood by Therese Anne Fowler is a book that was difficult to put down once I started it. A Good Neighborhood is a “gripping contemporary novel that examines the American dream through the lens of two families living side by side in an idyllic neighborhood, throughout one summer that changes their lives irrevocably.”

I selected the book as it focuses, among other issues, on gentrification and environmental degradation. But to say that is what it is about would be a disservice. It also includes a full range of the social issues of our time.

But with little in common except a property line, these two very different families quickly find themselves at odds: first, over an historic oak tree in Valerie’s yard, and soon after, the blossoming romance between their two teenagers. Told from multiple points of view, A Good Neighborhood asks big questions about life in America today ― what does it mean to be a good neighbor? How do we live alongside each other when we don’t see eye to eye? ― as it explores the effects of class, race, and heartrending star-crossed love in a story that’s as provocative as it is powerful.

Ms. Fowler narrates the book. Greek Chorus. By doing this, she ensures that we are part of the story as much as readers.

We need to find answers to the big questions if we are to be good neighbors.

  • What does it mean to be a good neighbor?
  • How do we live alongside each other when we don’t see eye to eye?

The effects of class, race, and heartrending star-crossed love make this a must-read book.

I recommend the book to all readers.

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Losing Earth: A Recent History

Read: October 2019

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Losing Earth: A Recent History

by Nathaniel Rich

Losing Earth: A Recent History by Nathaniel Rich reminds us how close we were to halting the climate emergency, and our failure has resulted in our passing the tilting point. The book “reveals, in previously unreported detail, the birth of climate denialism and the genesis of the fossil-fuel industry’s coordinated effort to thwart climate policy through misinformation propaganda and political influence.”

By 1979, we knew nearly everything we understand today about climate change – including how to stop it. Over the next decade, a handful of scientists, politicians, and strategists, led by two unlikely heroes, risked their careers in a desperate, escalating campaign to convince the world to act before it was too late. Losing Earth is their story and ours.

The New York Times Magazine devoted an entire issue to Nathaniel Rich’s groundbreaking chronicle of that decade, which became an instant journalistic phenomenon – the subject of news coverage, editorials, and conversations all over the world. In its emphasis on the lives of the people who grappled with the significant existential threat of our age, it made vivid the moral dimensions of our shared plight.

Losing Earth tells the human story of climate change in even richer, more intimate terms. It reveals, in previously unreported detail, the birth of climate denialism and the genesis of the fossil-fuel industry’s coordinated effort to thwart climate policy through misinformation propaganda and political influence. The audiobook carries the story into the present day, wrestling with the long shadow of our past failures and asking crucial questions about how we make sense of our past, our future, and ourselves.

Like John Hersey’s Hiroshima and Jonathan Schell’s The Fate of the Earth, Losing Earth is the rarest of achievements: a riveting work of dramatic history that articulates a moral framework for understanding how we got here and how we must go forward.

Losing Earth is a must-read book!

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The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue

Read: May 2022

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The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue

by V.E. Schwab

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by V.E. Schwab is a page-turner, and one of the rare books I have read that I wish had not ended. On the last page, I wanted the story of Addie to continue now that she had modified her deal with the dark side to save Henry Strauss. It was not that I wished Addie and Henry to reunite; it was to see how Addie’s life with Luc would continue. I recommend this book without any reservations!

Both Jan and I have always enjoyed books and movies about time travel. One of the first books I read after Jan died was The Time Travelers Wife, and now I am reading another book about time travel. If I could travel back in time, I would love to spend tens of thousands of days with her again.

But time travel is not possible. Or is it? Her spirit returns to me whenever I am paralyzed, encouraging me to dust myself off and keep going. Maybe one day we will travel together!

The Goodreads summary includes an overview.

France, 1714: in a moment of desperation, a young woman makes a Faustian bargain to live forever and is cursed to be forgotten by everyone she meets.

Thus begins the extraordinary life of Addie LaRue and a dazzling adventure that will play out across centuries and continents, across history and art, as a young woman learns how far she will go to leave her mark on the world.

But everything changes when, after nearly 300 years, Addie stumbles across a young man in a hidden bookstore, and he remembers her name.

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Murder Bimbo

Read: February 2026

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Murder Bimbo: A Novel

by Rebecca Novack

Murder Bimbo by Rebecca Novack delivers a thrilling, unpredictable tale of a sex worker who morphs into a political assassin, thrust into a high-stakes game of survival. This captivating story weaves together elements of deception, murder, and the complexities of today’s political landscape, offering readers a fresh, gripping perspective that keeps them on the edge of their seats.

The protagonist, a thirty-two-year-old sex worker, is taken by surprise when undercover government agents approach her to assist in a top-secret plot to assassinate a politician known as Meat Neck. However, after the assassination, she realizes the harsh truth: she has been deemed 100% disposable.

Now holed up in an off-the-grid cabin in the woods, she has only two days, her wits, and a laptop to save her own life.

Her best chance is to reach out to the popular feminist investigative podcast, Justice for Bimbos. In a series of hastily typed emails, the newly dubbed Murder Bimbo reveals how she was recruited and trained by a group of covert U.S. agents to eliminate Meat Neck.

Next, she opens a new email addressed to her ex, where the facts present a different narrative.

Structured in three increasingly unhinged acts, each offering a more subversive version of the story than the last, Murder Bimbo is simultaneously a thrilling literary work, a satirical manifesto for vigilantes, or a raucous commentary on the political madness we experience daily. Regardless, it serves as a serious announcement of an electrifying new voice in American literature.

Rebecca Novack grew up in the Rocky Mountains. She has a master’s in theological studies from Harvard Divinity School.

Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!

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