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Giving Thanks to Jan

Estimated reading time: 11 minutes, 16 seconds
Jan Peace

November 25, 2021

My two favorite holiday memories are the first and last Thanksgiving with Jan. I was alone before I met Jan, and I am alone again. The first time was easier to manage, and today will be my first Thanksgiving without her.

This year, I could have gone with Mike and Elyssa for Thanksgiving, and I even had other offers to make a place at the table for me. 

I chose not to go anywhere for Thanksgiving, not because I would not have enjoyed myself, but because I will be volunteering to help the homeless on Thursday and Friday with Bridges Outreach.

In my heart, I felt it was what Jan would want me to do this year, and I knew It was what I needed to do. Both Jan and I spent our lives working to repair the world.

Volunteering with Bridges allowed me to help others and partially repay all the support and love I have received since Jan died. In a future Thanksgiving, I may choose to break bread with family and friends.

But this year, it needs to be about giving to others, as it is the best way today for me to share Jan’s love. 

May you all be blessed with a healthy and happy Thanksgiving!

Love never dies; it only grows stronger.

Authors Note: I may update this post or stream with details about my volunteer work.

You might enjoy reading Will you marry me?

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On the Rooftop: A Novel

Read: November 2022

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On the Rooftop: A Novel

by Margaret Wilkerson Sexton

On the Rooftop: A Novel by Margaret Wilkerson Sexton, is a stunning novel about a mother whose dream of musical stardom for her three daughters collides with the daughters’ ambitions for their own lives—set against the backdrop of gentrifying 1950s San Francisco. The first few pages moved glacially and then the story unfolded fully and became a page-turner that I highly recommend.

After hearing Ms. Sexton’s interview on Get Lit with All Of It, a monthly on-air, social media, in-person, and live-stream book club hosted by Alison Stewart of WNYC’s All Of It, I picked up the book. The novel had been on my to-read list.

The novel was loosely based on Fiddler on the Roof and it worked exceedingly well. Vivian is the overbearing mother and the daughters who have their own dreams and goals. With urban renewal, AKA Urban Renewal, as the backdrop, the novel was one that I could not put down.

The small section of the song that Esther writes so she can sing for her people, was a song I wish I could hear in its entirety. That Chole choose to sing it for final audition made it even more powerful.

You put words to the music inside my heart You showed me the world could be its own art I’d never felt myself so whole before I’d never known how much I could reach for.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

At home they are just sisters, but on stage, they are The Salvations. Ruth, Esther, and Chloe have been singing and dancing in harmony since they could speak. Thanks to the rigorous direction of their mother, Vivian, they’ve become a bona fide girl group whose shows are the talk of the Jazz-era Fillmore.

Now Vivian has scored a once-in-a-lifetime offer from a talent manager, who promises to catapult The Salvations into the national spotlight. Vivian knows this is the big break she’s been praying for. But sometime between the hours of rehearsal on their rooftop and the weekly gigs at the Champagne Supper Club, the girls have become women, women with dreams that their mother cannot imagine.

The neighborhood is changing, too: all around the Fillmore, white men in suits are approaching Black property owners with offers. One sister finds herself called to fight back, one falls into the comfort of an old relationship, and another yearns to make her voice heard. And Vivian, who has always maintained control, will have to confront the parts of her life that threaten to splinter: the community, The Salvations, and even her family.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Send for Me

Read: January 2022

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Send for Me

by Lauren Fox

Send for Me by Lauren Fox. Send for Me is an achingly beautiful work of historical fiction that moves between Germany on the eve of World War II and present-day Wisconsin, unspooling a thread of love, longing, and the constant push and pull of family. Annelise is a dreamer: imagining her future while working at her parents’ famous bakery in Feldenheim, Germany, anticipating all the delicious possibilities yet to come. There are rumors that anti-Jewish sentiment is on the rise, but Annelise and her parents can’t quite believe that it will affect them; they’re hardly religious at all. But as Annelise falls in love, marries, and gives birth to her daughter, the dangers grow closer: a brick was thrown through her window; a childhood friend who cuts ties with her; customers refuse to patronize the bakery.

This novel explores mothers and daughters, duty and obligation, hope and forgiveness of four generations of mothers and daughters – Klara, Annelise, Ruth, and Clare.

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I enjoyed reading this book as I prefer historical fiction, especially about the rise of Germany and antisemitism.

Send for Me is also a reminder that we are refugees.

Our lives are forever intertwined between two cultures, the past and the future.

I highly recommend Send for Me.

 

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The Passing Storm

Read: May 2022

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The Passing Storm

by Christine Nolfi

The Passing Storm by Christine Nolfi is a gripping, openhearted novel about family, reconciliation, and bringing closure to the secrets of the past. From the first chapter, it was a pageturner and a book that engaged me when I needed to focus on life’s challenges. I was looking for something different from my most recent books.

I very much enjoyed this novel. It is focused on losses, including one parent and a daughter. I had not anticipated that but found that Ms. Nolfi handled that in an empathic way that did not trigger my grief but helped me understand my grief. The primary characters Rae, Quinn, Connor, and Griffin are brought to life by the writer. It left me wanting to know what happens to them now that they have survived the early stages of grief.

The Goodreads summary provides a good overview.

Early into the turbulent decade of her thirties, Rae Langdon struggles to work through grief she never anticipated. With her father, Connor, she tends to their Ohio farm, a forty-acre spread that has enjoyed better days. As memories sweep through her, some too precious to bear, Rae gives shelter from a brutal winter to a teenager named Quinn Galecki.

His parents have thrown out Quinn, a couple too troubled to help steer the misunderstood boy through his losses. Now Quinn has found a temporary home with the Langdons—and an unexpected kinship because Rae, Quinn, and Connor share a past and understand one another’s pain. But its depths—and all its revelations and secrets—have yet to come to light. To finally move forward, Rae must confront them and fight for Quinn, whose parents have other plans for their son.

There might be hope for a new season with forgiveness, love, and the spring thaw—a second chance Rae believed in her heart was gone forever.

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Cloud Atlas: A Novel

Read: September 2024

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Cloud Atlas: A Novel

by David Mitchell

Today, I started reading Cloud Atlas: A Novel by David Mitchell, one of The New York Times’ 100 Best Books of the 21st Century. Cloud Atlas begins in 1850 with Adam Ewing, an American notary, voyaging from the Chatham Isles to his home in California. Ewing is befriended by a physician, Dr. Goose, who begins treating him for a rare species of brain parasite.

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The Jackal's Mistress

Read: March 2025

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The Jackal’s Mistress

by Chris Bohjalian

Today, I dove into “The Jackal’s Mistress” by Chris Bohjalian, a gripping Civil War love story inspired by a true friendship that defied the odds. It follows the wife of a missing Confederate soldier as she stumbles upon a wounded Yankee officer. With the battlefield’s tension looming, she faces a heart-wrenching choice: How much is she willing to risk for the life of a stranger?

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Read: April 2026

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The Future Is Peace

by Aziz Abu Sarah and Maoz Inon

“The Future Is Peace: A Shared Journey Across the Holy Land” explores the experiences of two lifelong peace activists, Aziz Abu Sarah and Maoz Inon, who serve as guides in Israel and Palestine. Both have personally endured loss due to the ongoing conflict. They lead readers on a profound and transformative journey through this sacred yet tumultuous land, revealing the historical, political, and personal narratives that both divide and connect their communities and peoples.

“We do not see ourselves as Palestinians and Israelis, or as Jews and Arabs, but as human beings who believe in fostering a culture of dialogue, a culture of forgiveness, and a culture of peace. To those who see only division lines, we say: If you must divide us, let it be as those who believe in peace and equality and those who don’t… yet.”

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Pairing unapologetic candor with inspirational prose, Sarah and Inon are sending an urgent message: the people have the power to make change. Peace is inevitable. For Palestinians, for Israelis, and for the world that awaits their example, it is not just possible—it is the future.

Aziz Abu Sarah serves as Co-CEO of InterAct International, a nonprofit organization dedicated to promoting peace in the Middle East. He is a peacebuilder, entrepreneur, National Geographic Explorer, TED Fellow, and a respected speaker and trainer in conflict resolution and responsible travel.

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Maoz Inon is the Co-CEO of InterAct International, a nonprofit organization dedicated to promoting peace in the Middle East. He is a peace activist from Israel and an entrepreneur. In recognition of his efforts, he has received the prestigious Franco-German Human Rights Prize and the Shared Living Award from Abraham Initiatives.

He has spoken before audiences on Capitol Hill, at universities across the United States, and in the European Parliament. Additionally, Inon has contributed articles to various publications, including The Washington Post, Al Jazeera, and Haaretz.

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