What Losing Jan Has Taught Me
Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 18 seconds
If grief is in the rearview window, it is the result of what I have learned from losing the love of my life.
Before Jan’s death, I had convinced myself that I understood more than I did and was empathetic.
Oh, what little did I know?
When I was Jan’s caregiver, I began to learn how much I could do to help her.
Yet, when she died, I was in a pea soup and struggled to find my way.
Almost twenty months later, I genuinely believe my mourning period has ended.
I have learned more about what is meaningful and achievable.
I walk daily, write about Jan, love, and grief, and read more than ever.
Sharing Jan’s Love has become my mantra. When I give her love away, it returns to me stronger!
I have also learned to help others, both widows and non-widows.
As Arthur Schopenhauer said,
Mostly it is loss which teaches us about the worth of things.
One day at a time, with Jan’s spirit with me, I will continue to grow and be a better person in the New Year.
The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.
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I miss Jan every moment of the day.
However, I am no longer in grief.
I have wanted to shout that from the mountain or rooftop, but I have no access to either option.
Jan's diagnosis of Lymphoma to her death was twenty months.
I have traveled almost as long since she died as I did being her caregiver.
