Living Well Without Jan!

Living Alone as Best I Can!

Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 21 seconds

The day Jan died, I wasn’t sure how long I would live.

I still do not know, but none of us knows how many days we will live.

A good friend called the morning after the love of my life died to offer his sympathy and support.

He said, “You are resilient, and that will help you on your journey. You will survive despite the pain you feel today.”

At that moment, I was unconvinced of his opinion.

But over time, my resilience has rebounded.

I have always found this Tibetan Proverb a guide,

The secret to living well and longer is: eat half, walk double, laugh triple, and love without measure.

I am not sure if I eat half, but I never graze between meals, I definitely walk twice as far, and I laugh but never as much as I once did, but all things being equal, I have learned to love Jan without measure by sharing her love.

I will miss Jan forever, but I have learned to bring her with me and share her love one day at a time.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Why Am I Giving Her Love Away?

"Why are you giving her love away?" My answer is that I am not giving it away. What I am doing is sharing her love. The love they receive increases as they share it with others.

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Living Well Without Jan!
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Living With Loss, One Day at a Time

Read: September 2021

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Living With Loss, One Day at a Time

by Rachel Blythe Kodanaz

Living With Loss, One Day at a Time by Rachel Blythe Kodanaz is the book I would recommend for anyone beginning or in the early stages of grief. It should be on the griever’s nightstand so they can start and end their day with reading.

Ms. Kodanaz has presented at my bereavement groups and has been an inspiration. She encouraged me not only to continue writing but also to share my thoughts publicly.

Usually, I only write a review once I have finished the book. However, this is a collection of thoughts for each day of the journey. Over the first weekend, I read up to the number of days since my wife died. Now I will read the daily message each day. When I get to the end of the year, I will start over.

There are many essential gems in the daily readings. The one for Day 9, Love Never Dies, jumped off the page due to my writings on the same theme.

Love Never Dies. Your loved one has passed away, but the love you shared has not died. The memories you created, the connection you built together, and your affection toward one another will live forever.

Embrace the love and cherish the memories, as they will always be a part of you remain in your heart.

There are at least a dozen others that I have earmarked for future streams or even the basis of future posts.

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Yesteryear

Read: May 2026

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Yesteryear: A Novel

by Caro Claire Burke

Yesteryear” by Caro Claire Burke has been recognized as one of The New York Times’ Best Books of the Year (So Far). The story follows a traditional American woman, a “tradwife” influencer, who suddenly finds herself in the harsh reality of 1855. She must figure out whether this living nightmare is an elaborate hoax, a twisted reality show, or something far more sinister in this sensational debut novel.

My name was Natalie Heller Mills, and I was perfect at being alive.

Natalie lives a traditional lifestyle. Her charming farmhouse is rustic; her husband, a handsome cowboy; her six children, each more delightful than the last. So what if there are nannies and producers behind the scenes, her kitchen hiding industrial-grade fridges and ovens, her husband the heir to a political dynasty? What Natalie’s followers—all 8 million of them—don’t know won’t hurt them. And The Angry Women? The privileged, Ivy League, coastal elite haters who call her an antifeminist iconoclast? They’re sick with jealousy. Because Natalie isn’t simply living the good life, she’s living the ideal—and just so happens to be building an empire from it.

Until one morning, she wakes up in a life that isn’t hers. Her home, her husband, her children—they’re all familiar, but something’s off. A sputtering fire rather than electricity warms her kitchen, her children are dirty and strange, and her soft-handed husband is suddenly a competent farmer.

Just yesterday, Natalie was curating photos of homemade jam for her Instagram, and now she’s expected to haul firewood and hand-wash clothes until her fingers bleed. Has she become the unwitting star of a ruthless reality show? Could it really be time travel? Is she being tested by God? By Satan? When Natalie suffers a brutal injury in the woods, she realizes two things: This is not her beautiful life, and she must escape by any means possible.

A gripping, electrifying novel that is as darkly funny as it is frightening, Yesteryear is a gimlet-eyed look at tradition, fame, faith, and the grand performance of womanhood.


Caro Claire Burke earned her Master’s in Fine Arts from the Bennington Writing Seminars. She co-hosts Diabolical Lies, a politics and culture podcast. Yesteryear is her debut novel.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books I’ve personally vetted for quality and enjoyment. Supporting these selections not only helps me continue to provide you with personalized recommendations but also ensures you have access to meaningful stories that enrich your life. Your support truly makes a difference in helping me share more books and insights with you!


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The Land in Winter

Read: November 2025

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The Land in Winter: A Novel

by Andrew Miller

The Land in Winter” by Andrew Miller is a captivating exploration of relationships and a masterclass in storytelling. It reaffirms Miller’s status as one of the most brilliant chroniclers of the human heart. The novel has been shortlisted for the 2025 Booker Prize and has also won the 2025 Walter Scott Prize for Historical Fiction and the 2025 Winston Graham Historical Prize for Fiction.

December 1962: In a village deep in the English countryside, two neighboring couples begin the day. Local doctor Eric Parry commences his rounds in the town while his pregnant wife, Irene, wanders the rooms of their old house, mulling over the space that has grown between the two of them.

On the farm nearby lives Irene’s mirror image: witty but troubled Rita Simmons is also expecting. She spends her days trying on the idea of being a farmer’s wife, but her head still swims with images of a raucous past that her husband, Bill, prefers to forget.

When Rita and Irene meet across the bare field between their houses, a clock starts. There is still affection in both their homes; neither marriage has yet been abandoned. But when the ordinary cold of December gives way–ushering in violent blizzards of the harshest winter in living memory–so do the secret resentments harbored in all four lives.

An exquisite, page-turning examination of relationships, The Land in Winter is a masterclass in storytelling–proof yet again that Andrew Miller is one of the most dazzling chroniclers of the human heart.


Andrew Miller‘s first novel, Ingenious Pain, was published by Sceptre in 1997. It won several prestigious awards, including the James Tait Black Memorial Prize, the International IMPAC Dublin Literary Award, and the Grinzane Cavour Prize for the best foreign novel published in Italy.

Following Ingenious Pain, he released several other novels: Casanova, Oxygen (which was shortlisted for the Booker Prize and the Whitbread Novel of the Year Award in 2001), The Optimists, One Morning Like a Bird, Pure (which won the Costa Book of the Year Award in 2011), The Crossing, Now We Shall Be Entirely Free, The Slowworm’s Song, and The Land in Winter (which won the Winston Graham Historical Prize and the Walter Scott Prize for Historical Fiction in 2025).

Andrew Miller’s novels have been translated into twenty languages. He was born in Bristol in 1960 and currently resides in Somerset.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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Funny Story

Read: November 2024

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Funny Story: A Novel

by Emily Henry

Today, I began reading Emily Henry‘s Funny Story, a delightful new novel about a pair of opposites connected by an unexpected bond. It was featured in The New York Times 100 Notable Books of 2024. The narrator, Daphne, finds herself single after being dumped following her fiancé’s bachelor party, and she ends up moving in with her ex-fiancé’s former boyfriend.

Daphne always enjoyed how her fiancé, Peter, told their love story: they met on a blustery day, fell in love over an errant hat, and moved back to his lakeside hometown to start their life together. He was great at telling their story—until he realized he was in love with his childhood best friend, Petra.

This is where Daphne begins her new chapter: stranded in beautiful Waning Bay, Michigan, without friends or family, but with a dream job as a children’s librarian (which barely pays the bills). She proposes to room with the only person who might understand her situation: Miles Nowak, Petra’s ex.

Miles is scruffy and chaotic, finding comfort in the sounds of heartbreak ballads. He is the opposite of practical, buttoned-up Daphne, whose coworkers know so little about her that they have a running bet whether she is in the FBI or witness protection. The two roommates initially avoid each other, but one day, while mourning their circumstances, they develop a fragile friendship and devise a plan. Their plan includes posting misleading photos of their summer adventures together—who could blame them for wanting to create a better story?

But it’s all just for show, of course, because there’s no way Daphne would start this new chapter by falling in love with her ex-fiancé’s new fiancée’s ex… right?



When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!


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Maggie; or, A Man and a Woman Walk Into a Bar

Read: December 2025

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Maggie, or A Man and a Woman Walk Into a Bar

by Katie Yee

In the style of Jenny Offill and inspired by Nora Ephron‘s humorous and poignant writing on heartbreak and womanhood, “Maggie, or A Man and a Woman Walk Into a Bar” by Katie Yee is a masterclass in transforming personal tragedy into bold comedy. This debut novel has been recognized as a New York Times Notable Book and in Time’s list of 100 Must-Read Books of 2025, along with features in many other publications.

A man and a woman walk into a restaurant. The woman expects a lovely night filled with endless plates of samosas. Instead, she finds out her husband is having an affair with a woman named Maggie.

A short while after, her chest starts to ache. She walks into an examination room, where she finds out the pain in her breast isn’t just heartbreak—it’s cancer. She decides to call the tumor Maggie.

Unfolding in fragments over the following months, Maggie, or a Man and a Woman Walk Into a Bar follows the narrator as she embarks on a journey of grief, healing, and reclamation. She starts talking to Maggie (the tumor), getting acquainted with her body’s new inhabitant. She overgenerously creates a “Guide to My Husband: A User’s Manual” for Maggie (the other woman), hoping to ease the process of discovering her ex-husband’s whims and quirks. She turns her children’s bedtime stories into retellings of Chinese folklore passed down by her mother, in an attempt to help them fall in love with their shared culture—and perhaps save herself in the process.


Katie Yee is a writer based in Brooklyn. She has received fellowships from the Center for Fiction, the Asian American Writers’ Workshop, and Kundiman. Her work has been published in the Los Angeles Review of Books, No Tokens, The Believer, Washington Square Review, Triangle House, Epiphany, and Literary Hub. During the day, she works at the Brooklyn Museum, and at night, she writes—often under the watchful eye of her judgmental rescue dog, Ollie.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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Lincoln in the Bardo: A Novel

Read: August 2024

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Lincoln in the Bardo: A Novel

by George Saunders

My journey with “Lincoln in the Bardo: A Novel” by George Saunders began with recognition as one of The New York Times’ 100 Best Books of the Century. As I turned its pages, I was immersed in its profound exploration of living and loving in the face of inevitable endings. The book, which struck a personal chord with me after a loss, is a testament to Saunders’ storytelling prowess and a must-read for those interested in Abraham Lincoln.

February 1862. The Civil War is less than one year old. The fighting has begun in earnest, and the nation has already realized it is in for a long, bloody struggle. Meanwhile, President Lincoln’s beloved eleven-year-old son, Willie, lies upstairs in the White House, gravely ill. In a matter of days, despite predictions of a recovery, Willie dies and is laid to rest in a Georgetown cemetery. “My poor boy, he was too good for this earth,” the president says at the time. “God has called him home.” Newspapers report that a grief-stricken Lincoln returns, alone, to the crypt several times to hold his boy’s body.

From a seed of historical truth, George Saunders weaves an unforgettable tale of familial love and loss that transcends its realistic, historical framework. The story takes a daring leap into a realm that is hilarious and terrifyingly supernatural. Willie Lincoln’s journey in a strange purgatory, where ghosts mingle, gripe, commiserate, quarrel, and enact bizarre acts of penance, is a testament to Saunders’ imaginative prowess. The monumental struggle over young Willie’s soul in this transitional state, known as the bardo in the Tibetan tradition, is a narrative that will leave you spellbound.

Lincoln in the Bardo is an astonishing feat of imagination and a bold step forward from one of his generation’s most important and influential writers. Formally daring, generous in spirit, and deeply concerned with matters of the heart, it is a testament to fiction’s ability to speak honestly and powerfully about the things that matter to us. Saunders has invented a thrilling new form that deploys a kaleidoscopic, theatrical panorama of voices to ask a timeless, profound question: How do we live and love when we know everything we love must end?


George Saunders is the author of thirteen books, including the novel Lincoln in the Bardo, which won the Booker Prize, and five collections of stories, including Tenth of December, which was a finalist for the National Book Award, and the recent collection Liberation Day (selected by former President Obama as one of his ten favorite books of 2022).

Three of Saunders’s books—Pastoralia, Tenth of December, and Lincoln in the Bardo—were chosen for The New York Times’s list of the 100 Best Books of the 21st Century. Saunders hosts the popular Story Club on Substack, which grew out of his book, A Swim in a Pond in the Rain. In 2013, he was named one of Time’s 100 Most Influential People. He teaches in the creative writing program at Syracuse University.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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