Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times

Yearning for One More Kiss

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 36 seconds

I am reading Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times by Katherine May. In the Saturday Grief Group, many participants mentioned how winter impacts them. Ms. May’s book is “an intimate, revelatory book exploring the ways we can care for and repair ourselves when life knocks us down.”

Although I have not finished reading the book, one quote resonated with me,

“That’s what grief is – a yearning for that last moment of contact that would settle everything.”

Jan and I fulfilled that yearning the day she died with our last kiss, and I love you.

Love never dies!

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Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times

Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times

Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times by Katherine May is “an intimate, revelatory book exploring the ways we can care for and repair ourselves when life knocks us down.”

A quote that resonated with me:

That’s what grief is - a yearning for that last moment of contact that would settle everything.

May writes in a clear voice that conveys the importance of accepting the cycles of life instead of fighting them.

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Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times

Read: October 2021

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Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times

by Katherine May

Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times by Katherine May is “an intimate, revelatory book exploring the ways we can care for and repair ourselves when life knocks us down.”

Two quotes that resonated with me were:

That’s what grief is – a yearning for that one last moment of contact that would settle everything.

We are in the habit of imagining our lives to be linear, a long march from birth to death in which we mass our powers, only to surrender them again, all the while slowly losing our youthful beauty. This is a brutal untruth. Life meanders through the woods. We have seasons when we flourish and seasons when the leaves fall upon us, revealing our bare bones. Given time they grow again.

May writes in a clear voice that conveys the importance of accepting the cycles of life instead of fighting them.

Sometimes you slip through the cracks: unforeseen circumstances like an abrupt illness, the death of a loved one, a breakup, or a job loss can derail a life. These periods of dislocation can be lonely and unexpected. For May, her husband fell ill, her son stopped attending school, and her own medical issues led her to leave a demanding job. Wintering explores how she not only endured this painful time but embraced the singular opportunities it offered.

A moving personal narrative shot through with lessons from literature, mythology, and the natural world, May’s story offers instruction on the transformative power of rest and retreat. Illumination emerges from many sources: solstice celebrations and dormice hibernation, C.S. Lewis and Sylvia Plath swimming in icy waters, and sailing arctic seas.

Ultimately Wintering invites us to change how we relate to our own fallow times. May models an active acceptance of sadness and finds nourishment in deep retreat, joy in the serene beauty of winter, and encouragement in understanding life as cyclical, not linear. A secular mystic, May forms a guiding philosophy for transforming the hardships that arise before the ushering in of a new season.

I recommend this book without reservation.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times
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The Jackal's Mistress

Read: March 2025

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The Jackal’s Mistress

by Chris Bohjalian

Today, I dove into “The Jackal’s Mistress” by Chris Bohjalian, a gripping Civil War love story inspired by a true friendship that defied the odds. It follows the wife of a missing Confederate soldier as she stumbles upon a wounded Yankee officer. With the battlefield’s tension looming, she faces a heart-wrenching choice: How much is she willing to risk for the life of a stranger?

Written by a New York Times bestselling author renowned for captivating historical novels like “Hour of the Witch” and “The Sandcastle Girls,” this tale promises an unforgettable journey of love and sacrifice.

Virginia, 1864—Libby Steadman’s husband has been away so long that she can barely remember his voice in her dreams. While she longs for him at night, fearing he is dead in a Union prison camp, her days are spent running a gristmill with her teenage niece, a hired hand, and his wife. The Confederate Army requisitions all the grain they produce. It’s a precarious life in the Shenandoah Valley, a region that frequently changes hands, with control shifting back and forth between North and South. Libby wakes each morning expecting to see her land transformed into a battlefield.

Then, Libby discovers a gravely injured Union officer left for dead in a neighbor’s house, his hand and leg bones shattered. Captain Jonathan Weybridge of the Vermont Brigade is her enemy, but he is also in dire need. Libby faces a terrible decision: should she leave him to die alone, or should she risk treason and try to nurse him back to health? If she succeeds, will she attempt to secretly bring him across Union lines in hopes of negotiating a trade for news about her husband?

The Jackal’s Mistress” is a vivid and sweeping story of two people navigating the boundaries of love and humanity amid a backdrop of brutal violence. This heart-stopping novel is based on a largely unknown piece of American history and showcases one of our greatest storytellers.


Chris Bohjalian is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of twenty-five books, including “The Princess of Las Vegas,” “The Lioness,” “Hour of the Witch,” “Midwives,” and “The Flight Attendant,” which has been adapted into a limited series on Max starring Kaley Cuoco.

His other notable works include “The Red Lotus,” “The Guest Room,” “Close Your Eyes, Hold Hands,” “The Sandcastle Girls,” “Skeletons at the Feast,” and “The Double Bind.” Several of his novels, including “Secrets of Eden,” “Midwives,” and “Past the Bleachers,” have been adapted into movies. Bohjalian’s works have been translated into more than thirty-five languages. In addition to writing novels, he is also a playwright, with works such as “The Club,” “Wingspan,” and “Midwives.

He resides in Vermont and can be found online at chrisbohjalian.com and on Facebook, Instagram, X, TikTok, Litsy, and Goodreads.



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The Lion's Den

Read: January 2023

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The Lion’s Den

by Anthony Marra

Today, I read The Lion’s Den by Anthony Marra. After a four and one-half Zoom meeting, I was looking for a book I could finish tonight, and the third book in the Inheritance, a collection of five stories about secrets, unspoken desires, and dangerous revelations between loved ones, seemed like the book to read. The Lion’s Den is the story of Michael, a son, his father’s transgressions in a tell-all were the ethical, righteous—and profitable—thing to do. What’s left but to slink back home for a humbling face-to-face with the man whose secrets he sold?

It was the perfect novel to read this evening. In the opening paragraph, when Michael’s father describes the automated customer service computer voice.” Siri’s dimwitted stepsister,” I knew I could enjoy this book.

Michael’s last-minute invitation to be the Ethics Symposium speaker at his parochial school was written in a way that was both bluntly honest and humorous.

Michael’s visits with his father to the lion’s den at the National Zoo were profoundly moving, and when the wheelchair was left there after his father’s death brought tears to my eyes.

I highly recommend The Lion’s Den, part of Inheritance, a collection of five stories about secrets, unspoken desires, and dangerous revelations between loved ones. Each Inheritance piece can be read or listened to in a single setting. By yourself, behind closed doors, or shared with someone you trust. This is the third one in the series I have read. The previous two were Everything My Mother Taught Me and Can You Feel This?

I have enjoyed all three and look forward to reading the final two.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

Exposing his father’s transgressions in a tell-all was the ethical, righteous—and profitable—thing to do. What’s left but to slink back home for a humbling face-to-face with the man whose secrets he sold?

He was a notorious government whistle-blower. Depending on whom you ask, he’s a treasonous felon, a folk hero, a validated patriot, or a national disgrace. To his son, Michael, he’s the father who threw his family into upheaval. Now, having moved back home at thirty-four, Michael is getting to know him as a man and getting nearer to understanding his motivations that have remained a mystery in this darkly humorous short story of sacrifice and betrayal by New York Times bestselling author Anthony Marra.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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Chain Gang All Stars

Read: December 2023

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Chain Gang All Stars

by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah

Today, I started reading “Chain Gang All Stars” by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah. The story revolves around Loretta Thurwar and Hamara “Hurricane Staxxx” Stacker, the main characters of the Chain-Gang All-Stars, a highly controversial and top-rated program in America’s private prison industry. The program is called Criminal Action Penal Entertainment (CAPE), where prisoners compete for the ultimate prize- their freedom. It’s similar to the return of the gladiators but in a modern-day setting.

The story is set in a prison called CAPE, where inmates are forced to participate in death matches as a part of a chain-gang. These matches are held in front of cheering crowds, while the prison authorities claim it to be a righteous act. Among the participants, Thurwar and Staxxx are the most popular as they are also lovers. Thurwar is just a few matches away from her freedom, which she carries with a heavy heart and lethal hammer. Thurwar contemplates how she can help her fellow inmates preserve their humanity despite being forced into these brutal games. However, the owners of CAPE are determined to safeguard their status quo, and they will go to extreme lengths to stop anyone who challenges them. Thurwar’s attempts to resist the system have devastating consequences.

Chain-Gang All-Stars” is a powerful book that sheds light on the American prison system’s problematic alliance with systemic racism, unchecked capitalism, and mass incarceration. It critically examines the situation from various perspectives, from the Links in the field to the protestors, the CAPE employees, and beyond. The book offers a clear-eyed reckoning of what freedom really means in America. It is a noteworthy contribution from a “new and necessary American voice,” as described by Tommy Orange in The New York Times Book Review.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Regarding gifts made this month, I will match dollar for dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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You Dreamed of Empires: A Novel

Read: December 2024

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You Dreamed of Empires: A Novel

by Álvaro Enrigue

Today, I began reading “You Dreamed of Empires: A Novel” by Álvaro Enrigue, translated by Natasha Wimmer. This book is from the visionary author of “Sudden Death,” a hallucinatory and revelatory tale of colonial revenge. It has been recognized as one of The New York Times’ 100 Notable Books of 2024 and included in the list of 10 Best Books of 2024. So far, I have read four of the top five fiction books of 2024: “All Fours,” “James,” “Martyr!,” and “Good Material.”

One morning in 1519, conquistador Hernán Cortés entered the city of Tenochtitlan, today’s Mexico City. Later that day, he will meet the emperor Moctezuma in a collision of two worlds, two empires, two languages, and two possible futures.

Cortés is accompanied by his captains, troops, prized horses, and two translators: Friar Aguilar, a taciturn friar, and Malinalli, an enslaved, strategic Nahua princess. After nearly bungling their entrance to the city, the Spaniards are greeted at a ceremonial welcome meal by the steely Aztec princess Atotoxtli, sister and wife of Moctezuma. As they await their meeting with the emperor – who is at a political and spiritual crossroads and relies on hallucinogens to get by – Cortés and his entourage are ensconced in the labyrinthine palace. Soon, one of Cortés’s captains, Jazmín Caldera, overwhelmed by the place’s grandeur, began questioning the ease with which they were welcomed into the city and wondered at the chances of getting out alive, much less conquering the empire. And what if… they don’t?

You Dreamed of Empires brings Tenochtitlan to life at its height and reimagines its destiny. The incomparably original Álvaro Enrigue sets afire the moment of conquest and turns it into a revolution, a restitutive, fantastical counterattack, in a novel so electric and unique that it feels like a dream.



When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!


 

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The Exhibitionist: A Novel

Read: July 2023

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The Exhibitionist: A Novel

by Charlotte Mendelson

I began reading Charlotte Mendelson‘s novel, The Exhibitionist, today. The book tells the story of Lucia and Ray, two artists whose marriage starts to fall apart over a weekend. It explores themes such as art, sacrifice, family dynamics, queer desire, and personal freedom. Charlotte Mendelson has created yet another exceptional novel with The Exhibitionist, ranked as the year’s novel by The Times of London, and described as “furiously funny.”

The Hanrahan family is coming together for an important weekend. Ray Hanrahan, a well-known artist with a big ego, is preparing for his first exhibition in many years. His eldest daughter, Leah, is his biggest supporter. His son, Patrick, has decided to pursue his own path. His youngest daughter, Jess, has a big decision to make. Ray’s wife, Lucia, is also an artist but has always prioritized her roles as a wife and mother. She is keeping secrets of her own and must decide which desires to pursue as the weekend progresses and the exhibition approaches.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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Audition

Read: April 2025

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Audition: A Novel

by Katie Kitamura

Today, I dove into “Audition” by Katie Kitamura, and I’m already hooked! This gripping novel explores a woman’s journey as she navigates what could be the performance of her lifetime—and perhaps even two. It’s both exhilarating and disorienting, much like a Möbius strip that challenges our understanding of the people we cherish. I can’t wait to see where this story takes me!

The narrative begins with two people meeting for lunch in a Manhattan restaurant. She is an accomplished actress in rehearsals for an upcoming premiere, while he is an attractive, troubled young man—young enough to be her son. What is his relationship to her, and how does she see him?

In this compulsively readable and brilliantly crafted novel, two competing narratives unfold, challenging our understanding of the roles we play in life – whether as partners, parents, creators, or muses – and revealing the truths that each performance conceals, particularly from those who believe they know us best.

Taut and hypnotic, “Audition” showcases Katie Kitamura‘s virtuosic writing at its finest.


Katie Kitamura is the author of four previous novels, most recently A Separation and Intimacies, which was longlisted for the National Book Award and the PEN/Faulkner Award and was a finalist for a Joyce Carol Oates Prize. She is a recipient of the Rome Prize in Literature, a Lannan fellowship, and many other honors, and her work has been translated into twenty-one languages. She teaches in the creative writing program at New York University.



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Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!


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