Richard W. shared a stream on July 3, 2022
Fourteen Months Without Jan!

Fourteen Months Without Jan!

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 56 seconds

Jan in Lake EireOn most days, I believe it has only been fourteen minutes since Jan, the love of my life, died; but it has been fourteen months.  

Life without Jan will never be easy, but my love grows more potent each day despite losing time and space dimensions. 

Every day, I help others who have suffered loss, as it helps me manage the unbearable burden of grief. 

I participate in my groups and therapy with the enthusiasm of a child. 

Andrew Huberman’s Lab Podcast on The Science and Process of Healing from Grief has helped me understand the neuroscience of grief. I’m not sure I know how it works, but it has helped me. 

Our love will never cease regardless of my grief journey’s days, months, and years. 

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Healing from Greif

Loving Jan More to Minimize Grief

Thirteen months into my grief journey, I watched Andrew Huberman’s Lab Podcast on The Science and Process of Healing from Grief. I had avoided focusing on neuroscience in the initial year after Jan died.  In retrospect, I should have listened to this podcast sooner.  Dr. Huberman explains the three dimensions of relationships and the need […]
Richard W. Brown June 20, 2022

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Fourteen Months Without Jan!
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Bluff: Poems

Read: December 2024

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Bluff: Poems

by Danez Smith

Today, I began reading Bluff: Poems by Danez Smith, which was selected as one of The New York Times 100 Notable Books of 2024. This collection emerged after two years of artistic silence, during which the world slowed due to the COVID-19 pandemic, and Minneapolis became the epicenter of protests following the murder of George Floyd. In Bluff, Danez Smith powerfully reflects on their role and responsibilities as a poet and their connection to their hometown of the Twin Cities.

This book addresses the awakening from violence, guilt, shame, and critical pessimism to a sense of wonder, envisioning how we might strive for a new existence in a world that seems to be descending into desolate futures.

Smith infuses these poems with a startling urgency; their questions demand a new language, deep self-scrutiny, and virtuosic textual shapes. A series of ars poetica gives way to “anti-poetica” and “ars America,” implicating poetry in collusion with unchecked capitalism. A photographic collage builds across a sequence, illustrating the consequences of America’s acceptance of mass shootings. Additionally, a brilliant long poem—part map, part annotation, part visual argument—offers the history of Saint Paul’s vibrant Rondo neighborhood before and after officials decided to route an interstate directly through it.

Bluff is a manifesto of artistic resilience, even when time feels fleeting and the places we hold dear—both given and created—are in turmoil. In this powerful collection, Smith turns to honesty, hope, rage, and imagination to envision possible futures.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

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The Worst Hard Time

Read: September 2019

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The Worst Hard Time

by Timothy Egan

The Worst Hard Time: The Untold Story of Those Who Survived the Great American Dust Bowl by Timothy Egan was initially a book I selected from the e-library because nothing else I wanted to read was available. Once I started reading the book, I could not put it down.

Now that we have had the warmest summer since 1936 during the dust bowl, the book has even more meaning.

According to The New York Times,

The dust storms that terrorized the High Plains in the darkest years of the Depression were like nothing ever seen before or since. Timothy Egan’s critically acclaimed account rescues this iconic chapter of American history from the shadows in a tour de force of historical reportage. Following a dozen families and their communities through the rise and fall of the region, Egan tells of their desperate attempts to carry on through blinding black dust blizzards, crop failure, and the death of loved ones. Brilliantly capturing the terrifying drama of catastrophe, Egan does equal justice to the human characters who become his heroes, “the stoic, long-suffering men and women whose lives he opens up with urgency and respect.”

With the likelihood of more ecological catastrophes in the immediate future, this is a book I highly recommend.

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The Listeners

Read: June 2025

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The Listeners: A Novel

by Maggie Stiefvater

Maggie Stiefvater‘s latest historical fiction, The Listeners, is now available in stores today, and it’s an enthralling read that you won’t want to put down. Set against the backdrop of January 1942, the luxurious Avallon Hotel & Spa stands as a beacon of elegance amid the rugged beauty of West Virginia, its refreshing mountain waters promising to wash away the worries of high society until it is ordered to house Axis diplomats. Stiefvater‘s meticulous research and attention to historical detail bring this era to life in a way that will captivate any history buff.

At the heart of this gripping tale is June Porter Hudson, a local girl who has risen to the role of general manager. With remarkable skill, she navigated the early challenges of wartime operations, but nothing could prepare her for the complexities of hosting diplomats from the Axis powers. As tensions mount and secrets unfold, June must confront her fears and the profound changes in history, all while striving to uphold the dignity of the Avallon. Dive into this captivating story and feel the weight of the changing tides of history.

In the opulent world of the Avallon Hotel, the Gilfoyle family reigns supreme, their aristocratic lineage a testament to old-world charm and privilege. But this sanctuary of luxury is thrown into turmoil when the family heir strikes a clandestine deal with the State Department, bringing a motley crew of captured Axis diplomats into their midst. June, the hotel’s resourceful manager, finds herself in an impossible position, tasked with persuading her dedicated staff, many of whom have loved ones fighting on the front lines, to serve these enemy guests with charming smiles.

As tensions simmer beneath the surface, FBI Agent Tucker Minnick lurks in the shadows, his coal tattoo serving as a reminder of his rugged Appalachian roots. He presses his ear against the hotel’s walls, eavesdropping on the diplomats’ whispered secrets. Yet, his past clings to him like a specter, revealing that the very same balancing act that keeps June poised could lead to perilous consequences. Beneath the hotel lies Sweetwater—its power to heal intertwined with its potential to destroy.

June is known for her ability to charm any guest, but these diplomats challenge her mastery. They’ve waged a silent war at her doorstep, forcing her to confront the reality that clashing loyalties threaten to shatter Avallon’s polished exterior. As June navigates this treacherous terrain, she must weigh the actual cost of luxury and decide what she’s willing to sacrifice in a time of conflict.

Maggie Stiefvater is the New York Times bestselling author of the Shiver trilogy, The Raven Cycle, and The Scorpio Races, among dozens of other YA fantasy novels. Her books have sold over five million copies worldwide. She lives in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia with her husband and their two children.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!

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The Hero of This Book: A Novel

Read: November 2022

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The Hero of This Book: A Novel

by Elizabeth McCracken

The Hero of This Book: A Novel by Elizabeth McCracken is a searing examination of grief and renewal and a deeply felt relationship between a child and her parents. It is not a memoir but a remembrance of those we have lost. Ten months after her mother’s death, the narrator of The Hero of This Book takes a trip to London. The city was a favorite of her mother’s, and as the narrator wanders the streets, she reflects on her mother’s life and their relationship.

Thoughts of the past meld with questions of the future: Back in New England, the family home is now up for sale, its considerable contents already winnowed.

The following quote resonated with me.

I’ve always hated the notion, in life or in fiction, that the human personality is a puzzle to be solved, that we are a single flashback away from understanding why this person is cruel to her children, why that man has a dreamy, downcast look. A human being is not a lock and the past is not a key.

I highly recommend this book.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

The woman, a writer, recalls all that made her complicated mother extraordinary–her brilliant wit, her generosity, her unbelievable obstinacy, her sheer will to seize life despite physical difficulties–and finds herself wondering how her mother had endured. Even though she wants to respect her mother’s nearly pathological sense of privacy, the woman must come to terms with whether making a chronicle of this remarkable life constitutes an act of love or betrayal.

The Hero of This Book is a searing examination of grief and renewal and a deeply felt relationship between a child and her parents. What begins as a question of filial devotion ultimately becomes a lesson in what it means to write. At once comic and heartbreaking, with prose that delights at every turn, this is a novel of such piercing love and tenderness that we are reminded that art is what remains when all else falls away.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Whistler

Read: June 2026

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Whistler: A Novel

by Ann Patchett

Whistler, by Ann Patchett, tells the story of two adults reflecting on the choices they made and those made for them. It explores themes of bravery, memory, and the often small yet significant moments that shape our lives, as well as the inevitable loss that eventually touches us all. Beautiful in its simplicity, the novel ultimately reveals how love endures and how the experience of being truly known by another person—even for a brief time—can change everything.

When Daphne Fuller and her husband, Jonathan, visit the Metropolitan Museum of Art, they notice an older gentleman with white hair following them. This man turns out to be Eddie Triplett, Daphne’s former stepfather. He had been married to her mother for just over a year when Daphne was nine. Now fifty-three, Daphne hasn’t seen Eddie in many years, not since the event that changed the course of both their lives. Upon reuniting, time seems to vanish; despite their brief relationship, it had a profound impact on both of them, and now that they are together again, they have no intention of ever being separated again.

Ann Patchett is an accomplished author known for her novels, nonfiction works, and children’s books. Her most recent novel, Tom Lake, became a #1 New York Times bestseller. Patchett has received numerous awards, including the PEN/Faulkner Award, the Women’s Prize for Fiction in the UK, and the Book Sense Book of the Year Award.

Her novel The Dutch House was a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize. Her works have been translated into more than thirty languages, and Time magazine recognized her as one of the 100 Most Influential People in the World. In honor of her contributions to American culture, President Biden awarded her the National Humanities Medal. She resides in Nashville, Tennessee, where she owns Parnassus Books.

Discover your next favorite book and explore curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. Your support truly helps me share more meaningful stories and insights with you, enriching your reading journey.

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What Will People Think?

Read: June 2025

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What Will People Think?

by Sara Hamdan

If you’re in the mood for a book that’s equal parts hilarious and heartwarming, look no further than “What Will People Think?” by Sara Hamdan. This captivating tale takes readers on a journey of self-discovery, inviting them to explore the hidden facets of their identity. With its poignant exploration of love in all its many forms, the novel masterfully shows how these connections can truly transform us and inspire personal growth, leaving you inspired and uplifted.

Mia Almas, like many of us, has a secret. By day, she works as a media fact-checker—a role that her conservative Arab grandparents approve of. But by night, she performs at comedy clubs across New York City. Her grandparents’ approval is a significant part of her life, and it’s this conflict between their expectations and her true self that adds depth to her story.

As Mia pursues a forbidden romance with her boss, her standup gets better and bolder, leading to a surprising spotlight that exposes her secret gig. Horrified and worried that her rebellious act could mean significant consequences for her reserved Palestinian-American family, Mia frantically dives into damage control. However, all of her efforts to retreat from the spotlight reveal a family scandal from the 1940s that could alter everything, adding unexpected twists to her story.

As a hopeless romantic, I found this charming story to be an irresistible page-turner that will leave you both laughing and reflecting long after you’ve turned the last page.

Sara Hamdan, a Berkeley and Columbia graduate, is a former Merrill Lynch banker, New York Times journalist, and editor at Google. After winning a Netflix short story award, she received the First Chapter: Emirates Literature Foundation Seddiqi First Chapter Writers’ Fellowship for her debut novel, What Will People Think? Sara is Palestinian American, raised in Greece, and has called Dubai home for twenty years. When she’s not typing away on her laptop, she loves to spend time at the beach with her husband and two kids.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!

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