Centenarian Fantasies!

Centenarian Fantasies!

Living One Day at a Time Instead of Planning a Three-Digit Birthday!

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 10 seconds

As I approached the pedestrian bridge construction sign in Nomahegan Park, the sound of determined footsteps caught my attention. A runner, his pace unwavering, was swiftly approaching from behind. It was a pleasant, rain-free day, and I exchanged a friendly greeting with the runner as he passed me. Pausing to catch his breath, he shared a touching story about his father, who started walking at the age of seventy-eight after being diagnosed with diabetes. I run four miles a day,” he said with unwavering determination, “so I can live to 100.

His resolve was inspiring, a testament to the power of determination in the face of aging. But long-term goals can seem like a fantasy of youth. Reflecting on my commitment to walking, I remarked, “At forty, you could easily live another sixty years.” He kindly corrected me, revealing that he was 52, turning 53 soon. I nodded and wondered if he knew my age as he jogged ahead, leaving me lost in my thoughts as my feet continued to carry me forward.

Approaching the end of the park path, I saw my new friend turning around at the site of the missing footbridge separating us from the far side. I bid farewell to the peaceful park and carefully planned my routes to complete the 2.8 miles required for the monthly Apple Watch fitness challenge. Lost in my thoughts, I contemplated the passing of time and my once sincere aspiration to reach 100. I had been fortunate to have navigated past the difficulties of a non-existent mid-life crisis.

Believing that consistent physical activity and self-care could help me reach 100, I saw it as a reason to celebrate a century of living, with three-quarters spent with my bride. When I vocalized this optimistic outlook, my wife offered a contrasting perspective, saying, “Enjoy your centenary; I can’t fathom living that long.” Her words added an intriguing contrast to my thoughts, highlighting the different ways we perceive the passage of time and the idea of a long life.

Since losing my wife, I’ve learned to cherish each day as a precious gift. Completing my daily walk, once a routine activity, now holds great significance, especially considering I’ve done it for 1194 consecutive days. Living another twenty-five years evokes many emotions, yet I’ve learned to focus on the present and find meaning in these small daily triumphs. As I sit down to untie my shoes, the pain in my back serves as a poignant reminder of the toll that time has taken. These immediate concerns feel more pressing than any distant aspirations I once held.

Grief’s Lesson: Serving and Blessing the Living!

I have noticed various changes within me sparked by the transformative power of grief. It's a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the potential for positive change.

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Centenarian Fantasies!
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The Singing Word

Read: September 2025

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The Singing Word

by Walt Hunter

The Singing Word: 168 Years of Atlantic Poetry, edited by Walt Hunter, celebrates the people, land, and spirit of America. This remarkable collection showcases a wide range of contemporary and historical poetry from the 168-year archive of The Atlantic magazine. Since its first issue in 1857, the poetry published in The Atlantic has drawn attention to the nation’s ongoing journey of self-discovery.

The magazine’s verse has featured odes to American leaders and landscapes, laments for the dead, and calls for change, appealing to the enduring ideals of Atlantic readers.

This one-of-a-kind collection selects poems of rousing optimism, clear-eyed realism, and moving lyricism—poems infused with the language of America’s songs, myths, and history, from the Civil War up through the present in three rich parts: National Anthems, Natural Lines, and Personal Mythologies.

Curated by The Atlantic’s Poetry Editor, this anthology features both world-famous poets—from Longfellow to Limón, including Robert Frost, W. S. Merwin, Sylvia Plath, and Adrienne Rich—as well as poets whose work has never before been published outside of the magazine.

Offering readers an essential understanding of American canon and the evolving nation, its poets have yearned to capture—the poetry of The Atlantic is the poetry of America.


Walt Hunter is a professor of twentieth- and twenty-first-century literature and chair of the English department at Case Western Reserve University. He is also the fiction and poetry editor for The Atlantic.



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Good Material: A Novel

Read: December 2024

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Good Material: A Novel

by Dolly Alderton

Today, I started reading “Good Material: A Novel” by Dolly Alderton, the bestselling author of “Ghosts” and “Everything I Know About Love.” This book has been listed as one of The New York Times 100 Notable Books of 2024 and is among their 10 Best Books of 2024. So far, I have read three of the top five fiction books of 2024: “All Fours,” “James,” and “Martyr!.” I plan to read the fifth book, “You Dreamed of Empires,” next.

Good Material” has received widespread acclaim for exploring heartbreak, friendship, and the various ways to cope with these experiences.

Andy loves Jen. Jen loved Andy. And he can’t work out why she stopped.

Now he is. . .

Without a home

Waiting for his stand-up career to take off

Wondering why everyone else around him seemed to have grown up while he wasn’t looking

Set adrift in the sea of heartbreak, Andy clings to the idea of solving the puzzle of his ruined relationship. Because if he can find the answer, Jen may find her way back to him. But Andy still has much to learn, not least his ex-girlfriend’s side of the story…

In this sharply funny and exquisitely relatable story of romantic disaster and friendship, Dolly Alderton offers up a love story with two endings, demonstrating again why she is one of the most exciting writers today and the authentic voice of a generation. Her writing feels like a conversation with a close friend, making you feel understood and seen.



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Celestial Navigation

Read: June 2021

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Celestial Navigation

by Anne Tyler

 

Celestial Navigation by Anne Tyler is a book I found on our bookshelf about a month after my wife passed away. The title and a mental note that my wife had recommended it made it an easy choice.

One of the main characters, thirty-eight-year-old Jeremy Pauling, had never left home. In the early stages of grief, I was nowhere near making a similar choice and remaining housebound. However, if I had been, this book would have caused me to reject that idea immediately.

After the death of his mother, he takes in Mary Tell and her daughter as boarders. The other boarders quickly realize that Jeremy is falling in love with Mary despite his fragility and inexperience with women.

To share more about the book would reveal details that might be spoilers.

For me, the book was a good read and one that reminded me that love is both beautiful and complicated. Although Jan and I shared passion was nothing like theirs, it was helpful to compare their love and ours when my loss seemed impossible.

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O Beautiful A Novel

Read: March 2023

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O Beautiful: A Novel

by Jung Yun

O Beautiful: A Novel by Jung Yun, the critically acclaimed author of Shelter, has written an unflinching portrayal of a woman trying to come to terms with the ghosts of her past and the tortured realities of a deeply divided America. With spare and graceful prose, O Beautiful presents an immersive portrait of a community rife with tensions, competing interests, and one woman’s attempts to reconcile her anger with her love of beautiful but troubled land. I highly recommend O Beautiful!

I finished reading O Beautiful on International Women’s Day. It might have been coincidental, but in my humble opinion, it was the perfect book to read on this important day. Ms. Yun has written a novel that touches on the intersectionality of the core issues of our divided land. The misogyny, the racism, and the impact of capitalism out of control are all related and are affecting the quality of life in the early twenty-first century.

Elinor Hanson, the protagonist, is so vividly written that she jumps off the page and becomes someone we know as a family member. When she returned home to write about the Bakken oil boom in North Dakota, I felt I had known her all my life. Unfortunately, the novel ended when she finally understood the issues and was in touch with her anger. I wish it would have continued so that the problems might have been addressed. Despite this, I highly recommend this novel.

O Beautiful is the twenty-first book I have read this year! My goal was twenty-three.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

Elinor Hanson, a forty-something former model, struggles to reinvent herself as a freelance writer when she receives an unexpected assignment. Her mentor from grad school offers her a chance to write for a prestigious magazine about the Bakken oil boom in North Dakota.

Elinor grew up near the Bakken, raised by an overbearing father and a distant Korean mother who met and married when he was stationed overseas. After decades from home, Elinor returns to a landscape she hardly recognizes, overrun by tens of thousands of newcomers.

Surrounded by roughnecks seeking their fortunes in oil and long-time residents worried about their changing community, Elinor experiences a profound sense of alienation and grief. She rages at the unrelenting male gaze, the locals who still see her as a foreigner, and the memories of her family’s estrangement after her mother decided to escape her unhappy marriage, leaving Elinor and her sister behind.

The longer she pursues this potentially career-altering assignment, the more her past intertwines with the story she’s trying to tell, revealing disturbing new realities that will forever change her and how she looks at the world.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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The Rest Is Memory: A Novel

Read: January 2025

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The Rest Is Memory: A Novel

by Lily Tuck

Today, I dove into “The Rest Is Memory: A Novel” by Lily Tuck, and it’s already leaving a powerful impression. This poignant tale follows a young Catholic girl’s harrowing journey to Auschwitz, woven in a captivating Rashomon-style narrative showcasing Tuck’s brilliance as a storyteller. Esquire has rightly placed it on their list of Best Books for Fall 2024, and I can see why.

In Tuck‘s skilled hands, “The Rest Is Memory” transforms into an unforgettable piece of historical reclamation, breathing life into an innocent soul who has long been remembered only through a haunting triptych of photographs. It’s a journey that promises to linger in my thoughts long after I’ve turned the last page.

In this mesmerizing novel by Lily Tuck, we first glimpse fourteen-year-old Czeslawa riding on the back of a boy’s motorcycle. Tuck imagines Czeslawa’s upbringing in a small Polish village before her world imploded in late 1942. Stripped of her modest belongings, she arrives at Auschwitz shorn and bearing the tattoo number 26947. Shortly after, she is photographed. Three months later, she is dead.

How did this happen to an ordinary Polish citizen? This is the question Tuck grapples with in this haunting narrative, which frames Czeslawa’s story within the tragic context of the six million Poles who perished during the German occupation. A decade before writing The Rest Is Memory“, Tuck read an obituary of the photographer Wilhelm Brasse, who took over 40,000 pictures of Auschwitz prisoners—including three of Czeslawa Kwoka, a Catholic girl from rural southeastern Poland. Tuck cut out these photos and kept them, determined to learn more about Czeslawa. However, she could only gather the barest facts: the village she came from, the transport she was on, that she was accompanied by her mother and neighbors, her tattoo number, and the date of her death. Tuck crafts a remarkable kaleidoscope of imagination from this scant evidence, something only our greatest novelists can achieve.

Susanna Moore described the novel as “Beautifully written, all the while instilling a sense of horror.” Tuck’s language swirls around the reader, yet no word is out of place. The subtly rotating images tumble forth, accelerating as we learn about Czeslawa’s tragic time in Auschwitz, as well as the lives of real individuals, including the brutal Commandant Rudolf Höss, his unconscionable wife Hedwig, psychiatrist and child rescuer Janusz Korczak, and the sharp Polish short story writer Tadeusz Borowski. Although we know Czeslawa’s fate, we must keep turning the pages, thoroughly captivated by Tuck’s nearly otherworldly prose.



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Light to the Hills

Read: January 2023

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Light to the Hills: A Novel

by Bonnie Blaylock

Light to the Hills: A Novel by Bonnie Blaylock is about Amanda Rye, a young widowed mother and traveling packhorse librarian who comes through a mountain community struck by the nation’s economic collapse in the 1930s. I recommend this page-turner as it highlights the importance of family and community. From this foundation, truth lights a path toward survival, mountain justice, forgiveness, and hope.

The novel was recommended by Olivia Hawker, bestselling author of The Fire and the Ore, who said, “Light to the Hills is a touching meditation on motherhood and the importance of community, especially during difficult times.”

Last year I read a modern tale about Appalachia, Demon Copperhead. Both are good novels but very different.

Light to the Hills was a feel-good read despite the problems faced by Ms. Rye and the MacInteer family. It was precisely the book I needed to read this week.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

The folks in the Kentucky Appalachians are scraping by. Coal mining and hardscrabble know-how are a way of life for these isolated people. But when Amanda Rye, a young widowed mother and traveling packhorse librarian, comes through a mountain community walloped by the nation’s economic collapse, she brings with her hope, courage, and apple pie. Along the way, Amanda takes a shine to the MacInteer family, especially to the gentle Rai, her quick-study daughter, Sass, and Finn, the eldest son who’s easy to warm to. They remind Amanda of her childhood and her parents with whom she longs to be reconciled.

Her connection with the MacInteers deepens, and Amanda shares with them a dangerous secret from her past. When that secret catches up with Amanda in the present, she, Rai, Sass, and Finn find their lives intersecting—and threatened—in the most unexpected ways. Now, they must come together as the truth lights a path toward survival, mountain justice, forgiveness, and hope.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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