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The Triad of Love

Estimated reading time: 13 minutes, 6 seconds
Packing Day

Walking Into The Sky for My Third Big Climb for a Cure for All Cancers!

On April 26, I completed my third LLS Big Climb, and it was an exhilarating experience! I faced the heights of One Gateway Center in Newark and felt a rush of anticipation as I began my ascent into the misty clouds along a windowless hallway on that Saturday morning. Each step provided a new perspective on why I climb: to help find a cure for cancer.

Love Never Dies

In preparation for this challenge, I spent countless hours walking up and down Cranford’s six-story parking garage, which gave me a taste of the thrilling feeling of reaching for the sky.

Thanks to the support of friends, neighbors, fellow walkers, dreamers, survivors, and those who have lost loved ones, I became the second-highest individual fundraiser. With the donations I received and matching contributions, I raised a total of $10,662. My initial goal was to raise $2,000—a modest increase from my 2024 Big Climb. Within a few days, I reached that amount, and my goal continued to rise as more donors responded. A total of sixty-one donors contributed to my Big Climb. I truly appreciate every contribution and the unwavering support in this fight against cancer.

If you are a donor or someone I reached out to who did not contribute, I want to acknowledge my persistence in seeking your support. If I offended anyone in the process, I sincerely apologize. However, being proactive in asking for donations has become a significant part of my life, especially four years after losing my wife.

Although I did not know my official climbing time, I slowed down only once to turn back and take a photo of my wife. I touched my lips and then placed my hand on the image. I walk in her memory, serving as a constant reminder of the personal impact of cancer. More importantly, I walk to help find a cure not only for blood cancers but for all types of cancer. Every three minutes, someone in the U.S. is diagnosed with leukemia, lymphoma, or myeloma, and approximately every nine minutes, someone in the U.S. dies from blood cancer.

If climbing twenty-six stories can improve the odds for those diagnosed and help them become survivors, then the pain I felt after ascending into the sky was worth it. I urge you to join me in this fight by donating to cancer research. Together, may we one day find a cure for cancer.

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Being Mortal

Read: August 2019

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Being Mortal

by Atul Gawande

Before departing for Toronto to celebrate our 44th Wedding Anniversary, I went through the e-library. Everything on my list that I wanted to read was not available except for this book. Being Mortal by Atul Gawande is the book I read on our vacation before Jan’s diagnosis of non-Hodgkin Large B-cell Lymphoma.

Selecting Being Mortal might seem an accidental choice to some, and I believe it was a divine intervention. It prepared me to be a caregiver to my wife over the nineteen months of her fight with cancer. It helped me focus on the good life that my wife lived and not the pain and suffering.

Atul Gawande describes his book as “riveting, honest, and humane. Being Mortal shows that the ultimate goal is not a good death but a good life – to the very end.”

When I read the book, I wondered what I could have done to help my mother in her final years. The book offers an excellent overview of how nursing homes and assisted living facilities have struggled to meet the needs of their residents.

Dr. Gawande provides an in-depth overview of the benefits of hospice care. Although I knew of this option, reading this book helped me understand that I was ready for hospice when my wife came home for the last time.

He reminds us that “when it comes to the inescapable realities of aging and death, what medicine can do often runs counter to what it should.” As he writes in the book, the current system does not work and, in many cases, actually shortens life.

This book has had a lasting impact on my life. It allowed me to be a loving caregiver to my wife when she needed it more than anything else. I read it when it would be most beneficial to me.

I highly recommend this book.

Atul Gawande is the author of several bestselling books: Complications, a finalist for the National Book Award; Better; The Checklist Manifesto; and Being Mortal. He is also a surgeon at Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston, a staff writer for The New Yorker, and a professor at Harvard Medical School and the Harvard School of Public Health. He has won the Lewis Thomas Prize for Writing about Science, a MacArthur Fellowship, and two National Magazine Awards. In his work in public health, he is the Founder and Chair of Ariadne Labs, a joint center for health systems innovation, and Lifebox, a nonprofit organization dedicated to making surgery safer globally. He is also the chair of Haven, where he served as CEO from 2018 to 2020. He and his wife have three children and live in Newton, Massachusetts.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!

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The Guest

Read: May 2023

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The Guest: A Novel

by Emma Cline

The Guest by Emma Cline is a highly recommended book, recognized as one of the top releases for May by The New York Times. At first, I assumed it was just another typical summer romance novel I usually don’t enjoy. However, I was surprised that it was unlike any other beach read I had encountered.

The protagonist, Alex, finds herself in a difficult situation after making a mistake at a dinner party in the East End of Long Island towards the end of summer. The man she’s been staying with dismisses her and sends her back to the city. With limited resources and a waterlogged phone, Alex decides to stay on Long Island and explore her surroundings. She wanders through exclusive neighborhoods and beaches, leaving a trail of destruction behind her.

According to The New York Times, Alex’s days and nights waiting for Labor Day might be “an entertaining series of misguided shenanigans interrupting the upper class’s summer vacation. However, under Cline’s command, every sentence is as sharp as a scalpel, portraying a woman who toes the line between welcome and unwelcome guest and becomes a fully destabilizing force for her hosts and the novel itself.

Although the book has no experience with themes, such as using sex to secure what she desires, as soon as I started reading it, I could not stop. Regardless of my unfamiliarity with the topics, I highly recommend The Guest.

The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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The Tokyo Suite

Read: April 2025

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The Tokyo Suite

by Giovana Madalosso

I recently dove into The Tokyo Suite by Giovana Madalosso, expertly translated by Bruna Dantas Lobato. This captivating book represents the English-language debut of one of Brazil’s most thrilling contemporary voices. It intricately unravels the complexities of modern family dynamics, diving deep into the hidden tensions that simmer just beneath the surface of everyday life. Each page draws you in, inviting you to explore the rich tapestry of emotions and experiences that define our relationships.

It’s a seemingly ordinary morning when Maju, a nanny, boards a bus with Cora, the young girl she’s been caring for and disappears. The abduction, an act as impulsive as it is extreme, sets off a series of events that will force each character to confront their deepest fears and desires.

Cora’s mother, Fernanda, is a successful executive who is so engulfed in her crisis that she initially fails to notice her daughter’s disappearance. Her marriage is strained, and she finds solace in an affair, distancing herself further from her family. Meanwhile, her husband, overwhelmed by the complexities of their domestic life, remains emotionally detached. As Maju navigates the streets of São Paulo with Cora, the “white army” of nannies, a term coined by Fernanda, seems to watch her every move, heightening her sense of paranoia and urgency.

Madalosso’s narrative delves deep into the human psyche, examining themes of maternal guilt, societal expectations, and the search for personal identity. Rich and multi-layered, The Tokyo Suite is a poignant and gripping tale that captures the essence of modern urban life and the lengths people will go to reclaim a sense of control and meaning.

Giovana Madalosso is a Brazilian writer and screenwriter born in Curitiba in 1975. She has been a finalist for the Biblioteca Nacional Award and the São Paulo Prize of Literature. The Tokyo Suite is her English-language debut.

Bruna Dantas Lobato is a fiction writer and translator. Her translation of Stênio Gardel‘s The Words That Remain won the 2023 National Book Award for Translated Literature. Her fiction has appeared in The New Yorker,  Guernica, A Public Space, and The Common. Raised in Natal, Brazil, she is an incoming Assistant Professor of English and Creative Writing at Grinnell College.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

Enjoy a limited-time offer of 20% off your next book purchase at Bookshop.org!

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Switzy A Novel

Read: October 2026

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Switzy A Novel

by Emma Cline

“Switzy” by Emma Cline is a captivating exploration of an aging man’s final journey. Written by the award-winning author of “The Girls” and “The Guest,” the story follows David as he prepares to arrive in Zurich. Throughout the narrative, the story unfolds as a vividly rendered portrait of an unraveling mind. The tale is darkly humorous and deeply moving, presenting a mystery layered with others. The world, once so familiar, has become inscrutable.

Hypnotic and strikingly original, “Switzy” explores the depths of human consciousness, examining what remains for a man when the accomplishments and compromises that have defined him, along with the illusions he has relied on, vanish.

A private plane glides through the winter night, somewhere over Greenland. David, a retired executive, leans back in his leather seat and plays solitaire on his phone. Click. Click. Drag. Click. He has filled the notebook in his jacket pocket with familiar phrases and urgent reminders, but he struggles to recognize his own handwriting.

This is what David knows: Cody, his assistant, is asleep in the seat next to him and will guide him along the journey. He will stop in London, have dinner with his adult daughter, and meet an old friend in France he has been estranged from for decades.

David’s final destination is Zurich.

As he moves through hotel rooms, airports, and foreign cities, he feels his mortal life slipping away. His grip on the present weakens, and memories flood in: childhood Sunday roasts, stiff clothes reserved for church, and a summer spent at a friend’s house. He reflects on the losses and missteps that have marked his life.

Emma Cline is a New York Times bestselling author known for “The Guest”, “The Girls”, and the short story collection “Daddy”. “The Girls” was a finalist for several prestigious awards, including the Center for Fiction’s First Novel Prize, the National Book Critics Circle John Leonard Award, and the Los Angeles Times Book Prize. It was also selected as a New York Times Editor’s Choice and won the Shirley Jackson Award. Additionally, “The Guest” was longlisted for the PEN/Faulkner Award.

Cline’s stories have appeared in prominent publications such as “The New Yorker”, “Granta”, “The Paris Review”, and in “The Best American Short Stories” anthologies. She has received an O. Henry Award and the Plimpton Prize from “The Paris Review” and was recognized as one of Granta’s Best Young American Novelists.

Discover your next favorite book and explore curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. Your support truly makes a difference by helping me share more meaningful stories and insights with you and enrich your reading journey.

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All the Water in the World

Read: January 2025

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All the Water in the World

by Eiren Caffall

Today, I began reading “All the Water in the World” by Eiren Caffall. Like Station Eleven, this novel is a literary thriller set partly in New York’s American Museum of Natural History in a flooded future. In the spirit of “From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler” and “Parable of the Sower,” this adventurous journey offers hope that the most important things—love, work, community, and knowledge—will endure.

“All the Water in the World” is narrated by a girl who profoundly appreciates water. In the years following the melting of the glaciers, Nonie, along with her older sister, parents, and their researcher friends, remains in a nearly deserted New York City. They have established a settlement on the roof of the American Museum of Natural History with a strict rule: they may only take from the exhibits in cases of dire need. They hunt and grow their food in Central Park while also working to preserve the collections of human history and science.

When a superstorm breaches the city’s flood walls, Nonie and her family must escape northward along the Hudson River. They carry a book containing records of the lost collections. As they race down the swollen river for safety, they encounter communities that have adapted in various, sometimes frightening, ways to the new reality. Despite the challenges, they are determined to create a new world that honors everything they have saved.

Inspired by the stories of curators in Iraq and Leningrad who worked to protect their collections during wartime, “All the Water in the World” mediates what we strive to preserve from collapse and an adventure filled with danger, storms, and a fight for survival.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

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The Way of Integrity

Read: February 2025

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The Way of Integrity

by Martha Beck

Today, I started reading Martha Beck‘s “The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self,” a book recommended by my friend Mark. I always appreciate receiving book recommendations from friends and readers of my blog. In her self-help book, Ms. Beck asserts, “Integrity is the cure for psychological suffering. Period.” This book will be invaluable during my early period of grief. I purchased the eBook from Bookshop and plan to do so.

Bestselling author, life coach, and sociologist Martha Beck explains why “integrity”—needed now more than ever in these tumultuous times—is the key to a meaningful and joyful life. As she writes,

This book, as you may have gleaned from the title, is all about integrity. But I don’t mean this in a moralizing sense. The word integrity has taken on a slightly prim, judgmental nuance in modern English, but the word comes from the Latin integer, meaning “intact.” To be in integrity is to be one thing, whole and undivided. When a plane is in integrity, all its millions of parts work together smoothly and cooperatively. If it loses integrity, it may stall, falter, or crash. There’s no judgment here. Just physics.

In The Way of Integrity, Beck presents a four-stage process that anyone can use to find integrity, a sense of purpose, emotional healing, and a life free of mental suffering. Many issues, such as people-pleasing, staying in stale relationships, and maintaining unhealthy habits, arise from a disconnection from what truly makes us feel complete.

Inspired by The Divine Comedy, Beck uses Dante’s classic hero’s journey as a framework to break down the process of attaining personal integrity into small, manageable steps. She shows how to read the internal signals that lead us toward our true path and recognize what we yearn for versus what our culture sells us.

With techniques tested on hundreds of her clients, Beck brings her expertise as a social scientist, life coach, and human being to help readers uncover what integrity looks like in their lives. She takes us on a spiritual adventure that will change the direction of our lives and bring us to a place of genuine happiness.

Other books I have read with a similar theme, which I also recommend, include Man’s Search for Meaning, Climbing the Second Mountain, and The Pursuit of Happiness.

When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!

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