Jan is Still With Me

One Hundred Forty-Four Minutes

Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 8 seconds

Jan with a Therapy DogI have never been competitive, but since purchasing my Apple Watch 7 almost one year ago, I did not found a challenge I will not try.

The November test is to earn one hundred forty-four exercise minutes daily for fourteen days.

As of today, I have met this goal for seven days in a row. I need to walk at least seven miles a day to accomplish this.

With the unusual warmth that will end tomorrow, I had moments when I doubted I could achieve the goal.

But I persevere, place one foot in front of the other, and log the minutes I need to complete the task one more day.

If Jan were still with me, she would encourage me to keep walking.

My dad taught me that life is fragile and that one never knows when one cannot do what one enjoys.

Tomorrow, I will take one step at a time and cast my vote in Cranford’s Town Hall.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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The First Mile is the Most Difficult!

Since Jan died, the first mile has been the most difficult.

When she was alive, the first mile was one we walked together.

Now it is the most difficult.

When my eyes open and I stop the alarm on my Apple Watch, I doubt whether I can walk.

But then I hear Jan whispering in my ear.

Richard, you are capable and strong, and I believe in you.
With Jan's love, support and encouragement, I walk whispering back to her, one soul, one love everlasting!

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Jan is Still With Me

One Hundred Forty-four Minutes in Fourteen Days

Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 8 seconds

I achieved the goal of one hundred forty-four exercise minutes daily for fourteen days on November 14th. One more time, I walked enough every day to meet the destination within the exact amount of time allowed.

However, unlike achieving the Apple Watch’s goals, the last day was a bloody struggle.

I am still not sure what happened yesterday, but the final day was one that almost stopped my daily walks. I never showered, ached when I walked, and felt unsure if I would meet the goal.

I am still unsure if I slept on the cold tiles of my bathroom, and I may never know.

I am better today. Perhaps yesterday was a fluke.

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Jan is Still With Me
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More Than Enough

Read: April 2026

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More Than Enough

by Anna Quindlen

In “More Than Enough,” Anna Quindlen demonstrates her trademark warmth, humor, and insight as she delves into how our relationships shape our identities. The story follows a woman who, after receiving surprising results from an ancestry test, begins to question the true meaning of family and friendship. This wise and tender novel, filled with vibrant life, comes from the bestselling author of “After Annie.”

No one knows you like your book club.

High school English teacher Polly Goodman can talk about everything and anything with the women in her book club, which is why they’ve become her closest friends and, along with her veterinarian husband, the bedrock of her life. Her students, her fraught relationship with her mother, her struggles with IVF—Polly’s book club friends have heard about it all.

But when they give Polly an ancestry test kit as a joke, the results match her with a stranger. It is clear to Polly that this match is a mistake, but still she cannot help but comb through her family history for answers. Then, when it seems that the book club circle of four will become three, Polly learns how friendships can change your life in the most profound ways.


Anna Quindlen is the author of numerous books, including the #1 New York Times bestselling novel “Rise and Shine”, the bestselling memoir “Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake“, and the acclaimed guide “A Short Guide to a Happy Life“. She is also the author of the Oprah’s Book Club selection “Black and Blue“. Additionally, her other novels include “Blessings“, “One True Thing”. “Still Life with Bread Crumbs,” and “After Annie“.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Supporting these selections not only helps me continue providing you with personalized recommendations but also ensures you get access to meaningful stories that enrich your life. Your support truly makes a difference in helping me share more books and insights with you!


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Midwives

Read: June 2022

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Midwives: A Novel

by Chris Bohjalian

Midwives by Chris Bohjalian is “a compulsively readable novel that explores questions of human responsibility that are as fundamental to our society now as they were when the book was first published.” Forty years after the book was published, it is just as relevant, if not more so. Indeed, the book’s topics are more relevant today with the current set of decisions by the Supreme Court.

After reading The Pull of the Stars and watching every season of Call the Midwivesthis was the logical next book for me to read. It is also one that I know Jan read and liked. 

I highly recommend this book!

The Goodreads summary provides a concise overview. 

The time is 1981, and Sibyl Danforth has been a dedicated midwife in the rural community of Reddington, Vermont, for fifteen years. But one treacherous winter night, in a house isolated by icy roads and failed telephone lines, Sibyl takes desperate measures to save a baby’s life. She performs an emergency Caesarean section on its mother, who appears to have died in labor. But what if—as Sibyl’s assistant later charges—the patient wasn’t already dead, and it was Sibyl who inadvertently killed her?

As recounted by Sibyl’s precocious fourteen-year-old daughter, Connie, the ensuing trial bears the earmarks of a witch hunt except that all its participants are acting from the highest motives—and the defendant increasingly appears to be guilty. As Sibyl Danforth faces the antagonism of the law, the hostility of traditional doctors, and the accusations of her conscience, Midwives engages, moves, and transfixes us as only the best novels ever do


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The Time Traveler's Wife

Read: May 2021

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The Time Traveler’s Wife

by Audrey Niffenegger

My wife had asked me to read – The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger – on several occasions. When we first met, we both liked to read fiction and non-fiction. As we aged, I focused almost exclusively on non-fiction, and she focused on fiction. Since her passing, I have started reading more of both genres. We could now have a book club!

Both Jan and I have always enjoyed books and movies about time travel. If I could travel back in time, there are tens of thousands of days I would love to spend with her again. But time travel is not possible. Or is it? Her spirit returns to me whenever I am paralyzed and encourages me to dust myself off and keep going. Maybe one day we will time travel together!

I enjoyed reading this book, even if it was difficult to keep track of the periods. It is very much the type of time-traveling book that both of us would have liked to read, and it has helped me to imagine a world in which Jan and I will meet again.

But what if it is not time travel as imagined by H. G. Wells. As the Hasidic story foretold, God split our souls at birth and placed one part of my soul in her body and placed the rest into my body. Very few people are lucky enough to find the person who has the other half of their soul, and Jan and I did.

When my life ends, what if God takes a portion of our two souls and places them into new bodies. Each of their souls would include a part of each of us. Those two new people would have to find each other in the future to connect as we did. They might not see each other and forever hunger for true love. Whatever happened, they would not know that they once were very much in love.

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How to Love Your Daughter

Read: August 2023

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How to Love Your Daughter

by Hila Blum

I started reading a novel called “How to Love Your Daughter,” written by Hila Blum and translated by Daniella Zamir today. The book explores a complicated relationship between a mother and her grown daughter. It raises the question of how much harm we can do to our loved ones when love blinds us.

The story takes place thousands of miles away from home, where a woman finds herself peeking through well-lit windows at her two granddaughters. She has never met them before, as they are the daughters of her estranged daughter, whom she hasn’t seen in years.

The book’s central theme revolves around the woman’s attempt to understand how a once-loving relationship between her and her daughter ended up in such a distant and unfathomable state. The story shifts past and present as the woman unravels her memories and long-buried emotions. She tries to make sense of the seemingly insignificant moments of parental care that, combined, may have undermined what she valued most.

The author, Blum, skillfully delves into the complexities of family life, where a parent can easily cross the line between protectiveness and possession without even realizing it. The story leaves us wondering whether it’s possible ever to find our way back from such a point.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.



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The Wilderness

Read: October 2025

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The Wilderness: A Novel

by Angela Flournoy

The Wilderness” by Angela Flournoy is a remarkable and multifaceted follow-up to her critically acclaimed debut, “The Turner House.” A true talent, Flournoy skillfully captures how five women form deep, lasting connections over a lifetime, often reflecting the complex and uncertain nature of friendship, with sharp wit and vibrant language. The book is a finalist for the 2025 Kirkus Prize for Fiction and longlisted for the 2025 National Book Award for Fiction.

This era-defining novel centers on the lives of five Black women as they navigate their twenty-year friendship, moving through the dizzying and sometimes precarious transition from young adulthood to midlife. It is a highly anticipated second book from National Book Award finalist Angela Flournoy.

Desiree, Danielle, January, Monique, and Nakia are all in their early twenties, beginning their careers, marriages, and motherhood, while also settling into their big-city lives in New York and Los Angeles. Together, they are finding their path through the wilderness—an overwhelming, mysterious period of life filled with both freedom and consequences.

Desiree and Danielle, sisters whose shared history has only deepened their estrangement, cope with painful family wounds in different ways. January finds herself in a relationship with a “good” man but feels ambivalent about him, especially following her unexpected pregnancy. Monique, a librarian and aspiring blogger, unexpectedly gains online fame after calling out her university for its plans to whitewash its complicated history. Meanwhile, Nakia is striving to establish her restaurant without relying on her upper-middle-class family, who question whether she should pursue a more conventional career.

As these friends transition from the late 2000s into the late 2020s, evolving from young adults into grown women, they must discover what they mean to each other amid political upheaval, economic and environmental instability, and the increasing volatility of modern American life.


Angela Flournoy is the author of “The Turner House“, which was a finalist for the National Book Award, the Center for Fiction First Novel Prize, and selected as a Barnes & Noble Discover Great New Writers choice. It was also an Indie Next pick and recognized as a New York Times Notable Book of the Year.

Her fiction has appeared in The Paris Review, and she has written for The New York Times, The New Yorker, the Los Angeles Times, and other publications.

A graduate of the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, Flournoy has taught at the University of Iowa, Princeton University, and UCLA. She currently lives in New York.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books that I’ve personally vetted to ensure quality and enjoyment. Additionally, by supporting these selections, you’ll help me continue to provide you with more personalized recommendations. I earn a small commission from your purchase, which allows me to buy and share even more books with you. Your support truly makes a difference!


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Transcription

Read: May 2026

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Transcription: A Novel

by Ben Lerner

Transcription” by Ben Lerner has been named one of The New York Times’ Best Books of the Year (So Far). Hailed as “the most talented writer of his generation” by The New York Times Magazine, Lerner presents a gripping emotional drama that also serves as a brilliant exploration of the digital and literary devices we use to store or erase our memories.

The narrator of Ben Lerner‘s new novel has traveled to Providence, Rhode Island, to conduct what will be the final published interview with Thomas, his ninety-year-old mentor and the father of his college friend Max. Thomas is a giant in the arts who seems to hail from the future and the past simultaneously and who reenchants the air when he speaks. But the narrator drops his smartphone in the hotel sink. He arrives at Thomas’s house without a recording device, a fact he is mysteriously unable to admit.

What unfolds from this dreamlike circumstance is the unforgettable story of the triangle formed by Thomas, Max, and the narrator, as well as an exploration of fathers and sons, male friendship and rivalry, and the challenges of parenting in a burning world. One of the first great novels about the early days of COVID, it is also a brilliant meditation on those technologies that enrich or impoverish our connection to one another, that store or obliterate memory. Full of startling insight, but summoning the intensity of a séance, Lerner’s writing shows us how the air is full of messages, full of ghosts. Ultimately, Transcription demonstrates what only a work of fiction can record.


Ben Lerner is the author of several poetry and prose books, as well as collaborative works with visual artists. He has received fellowships from the Fulbright, Guggenheim, and MacArthur Foundations. Lerner has been a finalist for the National Book Award for Poetry and the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction, along with many other honors. He is a Distinguished Professor of English at Brooklyn College.



Discover your next favorite book and dive into a world of curated, exciting reads by purchasing through my links. You’ll have access to a diverse selection of books I’ve personally vetted for quality and enjoyment. Supporting these selections not only helps me continue to provide you with personalized recommendations but also ensures you have access to meaningful stories that enrich your life. Your support truly makes a difference in helping me share more books and insights with you!


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