April Showers Set the Stage for Jan's Birthday

Mesmerized by Jan

Estimated reading time: 0 minutes, 45 seconds

In partnership with the Hanson Park Conservancy, we will be installing a Lyman Whitaker Wind Sculptures in the Triangle.

The Double Spinner will reflect Jan’s spirit and enthusiasm for life. It will also be a beacon to the Cranford community and encourage more people to visit Hanson Park.

As I have shared this option with a few people, they talk about the Double Spinner as beautiful and alluring.

I agree that it is both, but the wind sculpture will never be as gorgeous or as mesmerizing as Jan. When I met her, I knew she was the only one for me.

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April Showers Set the Stage for Jan's Birthday
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Checkout 19: A Novel

Read: December 2022

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Checkout 19: A Novel

by Claire-Louise Bennett

Checkout 19: A Novel by Claire-Louise Bennett, a New York Times Best Ten Best Books of 2022; the newspaper highlights the novel’s “unusual setting: the human mind — a brilliant, surprising, weird and very funny one. All the words one might use to describe this book — experimental, autofictional, surrealist — fail to convey the sheer pleasure of ‘Checkout 19.'” I fully agree with this description and found myself living in my mind.

Since Jan died in May of 2021, I have found myself with no one to talk to about the day-to-day events that consume so much of our lives. Checkout 19: A Novel reminded me that I have only been carrying those intimate conversations in my mind. Is it surreal? Yes. Yes, it is. Reading this novel helped me to accept the importance of those conversations. The new characters and scenarios I conjure are less creative than Ms. Claire-Louise Bennett’s

Goodreads describes Checkout 19: A Novel as the adventures of a young woman discovering her genius through the people she meets–and dreams up–along the way. Checkout 19 is a radical affirmation of the power of the imagination, and the magic escapes those who master it open to us all.

I recommend this book.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

In a working-class town in a county west of London, a schoolgirl scribbles stories in the back pages of her exercise book, intoxicated by the first sparks of her imagination. As she grows, everything and everyone she encounters become fuel for a burning talent. The large Russian man in the ancient maroon car who careens around the grocery store where she works as a checkout clerk, and slips her a copy of Beyond Good and Evil. The growing heaps of other books in which she loses-and finds-herself. Even the derailing of a friendship, in a devastating violation. The thrill of learning to conjure characters and scenarios in her head is matched by the exhilaration of forging her own way in the world, the two kinds of ingenuity kindling to a brilliant conflagration.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Heart of a Stranger

Read: February 2026

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Heart of a Stranger

by Rabbi Angela Warnick Buchdahl

In “Heart of a Stranger,” Angela Buchdahl shares her journey from feeling like an outsider to becoming an officiant. She describes her transformation from estrangement to belonging, ultimately emerging with a deep conviction that we are all connected to a larger whole and purpose. Her book serves as both a memoir and a spiritual guide for everyday living, addressing a need that many of us experience today. As the first Asian American ordained as a rabbi, she offers a compelling account of her evolution into one of the world’s most respected religious leaders.

Angela Buchdahl was born in Seoul, the daughter of a Korean Buddhist mother and Jewish American father. Profoundly spiritual from a young age, by sixteen, she felt the first stirrings to become a rabbi. Despite the naysayers and periods of self-doubt—Would a mixed-race woman ever be seen as authentically Jewish or chosen to lead a congregation?—she stayed the course, which took her first to Yale, then to rabbinical school, and finally to the pulpit of one of the largest, most influential congregations in the world.

Today, Angela Buchdahl inspires Jews and non-Jews alike with her invigorating, joyful approach to worship and her belief in the power of faith, gratitude, and responsibility for one another, regardless of religion. She does not shy away from difficult topics, from racism within the Jewish community and the sexism she confronted when she aspired to the top job, to rising antisemitism today. Buchdahl teaches how these challenges, which can make one feel like a stranger, can ultimately be the source of our greatest empathy and strength.

While reading this book, I experienced a revival and deepening of my faith. “Heart of a Stranger,” “Man’s Search for Meaning,” “Judaism is About Love,” “Hostage,” and “The Amen Effect” are all cherished titles that I will reference and reread for years to come.


Angela Buchdahl is the first Asian American rabbi. She serves as the Senior Rabbi of Central Synagogue in New York City, the first woman to lead this flagship congregation in its 185-year history. Under her leadership, Central has grown into one of the largest synagogues in the world, with live-stream viewers in more than 100 countries. She has led prayers in the White House for two U.S. presidents and has been featured on national news outlets, including Today, NPR, and The Wall Street Journal, to discuss the day’s moral issues.

Rabbi Buchdahl and her husband live in New York City and have three children.



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The Furrows- A Novel

Read: October 2022

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The Furrows: A Novel

by Namwali Serpell

The Furrows: A Novel by Namwali Serpell is a bold exploration of memory and mourning that twists unexpectedly into a story of mistaken identity, double consciousness, and the wishful—and sometimes willful—longing for reunion with those we’ve lost. Namwali Serpell’s remarkable new novel captures the uncanny experience of grief, the way the past breaks over the present like waves in the sea. I highly recommend this book.

The Furrows: A Novel reminded me of my longing to be reunited with Jan. I know it is impossible, but that does not keep me from desiring the unattainable. Reading this novel helped me remind me that Jan is still with me in spirit and that is far better than reuniting with her.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

Cassandra Williams is twelve, and her little brother Wayne is seven. One day, an accident happens when they’re alone together, and Wayne is lost forever. Or so it seems. Though his body is never recovered, their mother, unable to give up hope, launches an organization dedicated to missing children. Their father leaves and starts another family somewhere else.

As C grows older, she sees her brother everywhere: in coffee shops, airplane aisles, subway cars, and cities on either coast. Here is her brother’s more aging face, the light in his eyes, his lanky limbs, the way he seems to recognize her too. But it can’t be, of course. Or can it? Disaster strikes again, and C meets a man, both mysterious and strangely familiar, who is also searching for someone and his place in the world. His name is Wayne.

Namwali Serpell’s remarkable novel captures the ongoing and uncanny experience of grief–the past breaking over the present like waves in the sea. The Furrows is a bold and beautiful exploration of memory and mourning that twists unexpectedly into a masterful story of black identity, double consciousness, and the wishful and sometimes willful longing for reunion with those we’ve lost.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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The Bully Pulpit

Read: October 2019

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The Bully Pulpit

by Doris Kearns Goodwin

The Bully Pulpit by Doris Kearns Goodwin is a history of the first decade of the Progressive era told by focusing on the intense friendship of Theodore Roosevelt and William Howard Taft.

Although I had read many books about Theodore Roosevelt, I had limited knowledge about Taft until I read this book. Reading about their friendship and its eventual collapse helped me to understand both of these presidents and the times in which they lived in a way I had not understood previously.

The Bully Pulpit is also the story of the muckraking press, which arouses the spirit of reform that helps Roosevelt push the government to shed its laissez-faire attitude toward robber barons, corrupt politicians, and corporate exploiters of our natural resources. The muckrakers are portrayed through the greatest group of journalists ever assembled at one magazine—Ida Tarbell, Ray Stannard Baker, Lincoln Steffens, and William Allen White—teamed under the mercurial genius of publisher S. S. McClure.

Goodwin’s narrative is founded upon a wealth of primary materials. The correspondence of more than four hundred letters between Roosevelt and Taft begins in their early thirties and ends only months before Roosevelt’s death. Edith Roosevelt and Nellie Taft kept diaries. The muckrakers wrote hundreds of letters to one another, kept journals, and wrote their memoirs. The letters of Captain Archie Butt, who served as a personal aide to both Roosevelt and Taft, provide an intimate view of both men.

I recommend this book without reservations.

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A Train to Moscow

Read: February 2022

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A Train to Moscow

by Elena Gorokhova

A Train to Moscow by Elena Gorokhova is set in post–World War II Russia; a girl, must reconcile a tragic past with her hope for the future in this powerful and poignant novel about family secrets, passion, loss, perseverance, and ambition. In a small, provincial town behind the Iron Curtain, Sasha lives in a house full of secrets, one of which is her dream of becoming an actress.

When she leaves for Moscow to audition for drama school, she defies her mother and grandparents and abandons her first love, Andrei.

Before she leaves, Sasha discovers the hidden war journal of her uncle Kolya, an artist still missing in action years after the war has ended. His pages expose the official lies and the forbidden truth of Stalin’s brutality. Kolya’s revelations and tragic love story guide Sasha through drama school and cement her determination to live a thousand lives onstage.

After graduation, she begins acting in Leningrad, where Andrei, now a Communist Party apparatchik, becomes a censor of her work. As a past secret comes to light, Sasha’s ambitions converge with Andrei’s duties, and Sasha must decide if her dreams are genuinely worth the necessary sacrifice and if, as her grandmother likes to say, all will indeed be well.

This was a page-turner, as I held my breath to find out the next steps that Sasha would take. Her ambition combined with the secrets she learns keeps the reader focused on the next page.

I recommend this book.

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Celestial Navigation

Read: June 2021

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Celestial Navigation

by Anne Tyler

 

Celestial Navigation by Anne Tyler is a book I found on our bookshelf about a month after my wife passed away. The title and a mental note that my wife had recommended it made it an easy choice.

One of the main characters, thirty-eight-year-old Jeremy Pauling, had never left home. In the early stages of grief, I was nowhere near making a similar choice and remaining housebound. However, if I had been, this book would have caused me to reject that idea immediately.

After the death of his mother, he takes in Mary Tell and her daughter as boarders. The other boarders quickly realize that Jeremy is falling in love with Mary despite his fragility and inexperience with women.

To share more about the book would reveal details that might be spoilers.

For me, the book was a good read and one that reminded me that love is both beautiful and complicated. Although Jan and I shared passion was nothing like theirs, it was helpful to compare their love and ours when my loss seemed impossible.

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