Planning Our Wedding!

Estimated reading time: 12 minutes, 22 seconds

Our First Home

Sweetheart, how are you,” I asked Jan as she answered the phone early in the morning. The apartment on Maujer and Humboldt we were planning to see tomorrow may not be the right one for us. One of the members at St. Johns called the landlord, and he guessed from her voice that she was not white and refused to show her the apartment.”

It might have been a nice apartment, but we do not want to live with a landlord who discriminates.

I agreed with her. We had heard about the apartment from a friend who was moving. We had tried to avoid a real estate agent to avoid the fee. 

Time is running out. I will stop by the real estate agent I know and ask what they have.”

Why don’t you wait until school is over,” Jan inquired. “That way, we can go together.”

As I was not working, I had been meeting Jan in front of Automotive High School every afternoon, so her suggestion made perfect sense. 

I waited for Jan across the street as the students raced out of the building.

When she exited, my spirits lifted like a helium balloon. 

I took her bag, hugged her, and kissed her sweet lips.   

Holding hands, we walked like two students in love.

“That was unfortunate about the apartment,” she said. “But, not pursuing it is the correct decision.”

When we walked into the real estate office, the realtor greeted me as we had met on a few occasions, and he had helped me secure my current apartment. 

“This is Jan, my fiancée!” Saying fiancée was still new to me, but it was a word that shook me from head to toe with joy.

“Nice to meet you,” he said.

We explained what we were looking for, and he quickly came up with several options. 

The last one we looked at was at 542 Lorimer Street. It was a third-floor walk-up. The rooms were large, but it was a railroad apartment. It reminded me of a trailer home.

It is $135 a month, heat and hot water included, and the landlords live on the ground floor.

The rent was a third of what Jan paid and three times more than I was paying.  

Jan was standing by the front windows looking at the NY skyline.

“What do you think, my love,” I whispered.

“I like it.”

Jan turned and asked the realtor if it would be available on August 1. 

“Yes, it will be.”

We simultaneously said yes.

“Great, I am sure you will like this apartment!”

The realtor said he would prepare the lease and told us the amount we needed to cover the first month’s rent and security. 

We shook hands as Jan, and I walked the three blocks to my apartment to get my checkbook.

As soon as we turned onto Ainslee Street, I took Jan in my arms. Looking into her eyes, I said, “We have found our first home!”

We kissed like our young lovers and walked confidently into our future. 


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We the Animals

Read: July 2024

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We the Animals

by Justin Torres

Today, I embarked on the literary journey of We the Animals by Justin Torres. This novel, listed among the New York Times’ 100 Best Books of the Century, is a groundbreaking work of art. The author of Blackouts immerses us in the tumultuous heart of a family, the intense bonds of three brothers, and the mythic impact of this fierce love on the individuals we are destined to become.

The narrative unfolds as three brothers navigate their way through childhood, a journey filled with emotional highs and lows, from playful acts like smashing tomatoes on each other to finding solace in each other’s company during their parents’ conflicts and even tiptoeing around the house as their mother rests after her graveyard shift. Paps and Ma, hailing from Brooklyn—he’s Puerto Rican, she’s white—share a profound and challenging love, shaping and reshaping the family numerous times. Life in this family is intense and all-consuming, filled with disorder, heartache, and the ecstasy of belonging to each other.

From the intense familial unity, a child feels to the profound alienation he endures as he begins to see the world, this beautiful novel doesn’t just tell a coming-of-age story; it reinvents it in a sly and punch-in-the-stomach powerful way. It delves into themes such as love, the meaning of family, and heartache, adding another layer of depth and complexity to the story.

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Bonding

Read: July 2025

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Bonding: A Novel

by Mariel Franklin

Mariel Franklin‘s debut novel, “Bonding,” is electrifying, sharp, and darkly humorous. It delves into the intersections of sex, technology, and pharmaceuticals in our digitally-driven world. The protagonist, Mary, is weary from a constant cycle of casual relationships and unstable jobs. After facing yet another career setback, she decides to escape to Ibiza.

There, at a party, she meets Tom, a brilliant chemist on the verge of launching a drug made to cure the anxieties of modern life.

Back in London after a heady trip, Mary runs into her volatile and driven sort-of-ex Lara, who has channeled her ambitions into an innovative dating app designed to revolutionize the industry.

When Mary begins working for Lara and falling for Tom, tech and pharma collide with shocking consequences, forcing her to question what love and success mean in a world that is hurtling out of control. A searing, elegiac satire of the way we live and work, Mariel Franklin‘s perceptive and unnerving Bonding heralds the arrival of a blazing new talent.


Mariel Franklin lives and works in London. She has an MA in English from Edinburgh University and later went on to study fine art at Goldsmiths. After graduating, she spent several years working in data administration in the tech industry. Bonding is her first novel.



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When I'm Gone, Look for Me in the East

Read: January 2023

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When I’m Gone, Look for Me in the East

by Quan Barry

When I’m Gone, Look for Me in the East by Quan Barry is a luminous novel that moves across a windswept Mongolia as a pair of estranged twin brothers make a journey of duty, conflict, and renewed understanding. Since Jan died, I have been sharing her love and not looking for her, so this novel attracted me as it was a counter-narrative. Are our lives our own, or do we belong to something more significant?

When I’m Gone, Look for Me in the East is a stunningly far-flung examination of our struggle to retain our convictions and discover meaning in a fast-changing world, as well as a meditation on accepting what is.

Although I know only a limited amount about Buddhism and even less about Mongolia, I found When I’m Gone, Look for Me in the East a fascinating page-turner of a novel.

Coincidently, while en route to see Memorial, we stopped to eat at a Mexican-Peruvian restaurant on Tenth Avenue in NYC. On the television was a continuous loop of a travelogue on Mongolia.

I found several quotes that I have used in other posts already.

  • “Sometimes faith is the only medicine available.”
  • “When the only hope is a boat and there is no boat, I will be the boat.”

I plan to use others in future posts.

Love never dies, and this quote echoed my belief.

“Love is neither created nor destroyed. It exists at all times and in all dimensions. Love is not something we create—it is something that wells up in us, like sap in a tree. It is an element in the fabric of the universe. Even on that distant day when sentient beings no longer exist, Love carries on. Perhaps our personal relationship to Love is impermanent, but Love itself is not.”

I highly recommend When I’m Gone, Look for Me in the East.

The Goodreads summary provides an overview,

Tasked with finding the reincarnation of a great lama somewhere in the vast Mongolian landscape, the young monk Chuluun seeks the help of his identical twin, Mun, who was recognized as a reincarnation himself as a child but has since renounced their once shared monastic life.

Harking back to her vivid and magical first novel set in Vietnam, Quan Barry carries us across a landscape as unforgiving as it is beautiful and culturally varied, from the stark Gobi Desert to the ancient capital of Chinggis Khan. As their country stretches before them, questions of the immortal soul, along with more earthly matters of love, sex, and brotherhood, haunt the twins, who can hear each other’s thoughts.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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The Time Traveler's Wife

Read: May 2021

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The Time Traveler’s Wife

by Audrey Niffenegger

My wife had asked me to read – The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger – on several occasions. When we first met, we both liked to read fiction and non-fiction. As we aged, I focused almost exclusively on non-fiction, and she focused on fiction. Since her passing, I have started reading more of both genres. We could now have a book club!

Both Jan and I have always enjoyed books and movies about time travel. If I could travel back in time, there are tens of thousands of days I would love to spend with her again. But time travel is not possible. Or is it? Her spirit returns to me whenever I am paralyzed and encourages me to dust myself off and keep going. Maybe one day we will time travel together!

I enjoyed reading this book, even if it was difficult to keep track of the periods. It is very much the type of time-traveling book that both of us would have liked to read, and it has helped me to imagine a world in which Jan and I will meet again.

But what if it is not time travel as imagined by H. G. Wells. As the Hasidic story foretold, God split our souls at birth and placed one part of my soul in her body and placed the rest into my body. Very few people are lucky enough to find the person who has the other half of their soul, and Jan and I did.

When my life ends, what if God takes a portion of our two souls and places them into new bodies. Each of their souls would include a part of each of us. Those two new people would have to find each other in the future to connect as we did. They might not see each other and forever hunger for true love. Whatever happened, they would not know that they once were very much in love.

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A Guardian and a Thief

Read: October 2025

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A Guardian and a Thief

by Megha Majumdar

Set over the course of one week, A Guardian and a Thief, by Megha Majumdar, a finalist in the fiction category for the 2025 National Book Award, tells two stories: Ma’s frantic search for the thief while keeping hunger at bay amid a worsening food shortage. The tale of Boomba, the thief, whose desperation to care for his family drives him to commit a series of escalating crimes whose consequences he cannot fathom.

With stunning control and command, Megha Majumdar paints a kaleidoscopic portrait of two families, each operating from a place of ferocious love and undefeated hope, each discovering how far they will go to secure their children’s future as they stave off encroaching catastrophe.

In a near-future Kolkata, Ma, her two-year-old daughter, and her elderly father are just days from leaving the collapsing city behind to join Ma’s husband in Ann Arbor, Michigan. After procuring long-awaited visas from the consulate, they pack their bags for the flight to America. But in the morning, they awaken to discover that Ma’s purse, containing their treasured immigration documents, has been stolen.

A masterful new work from one of the most exciting voices of her generation.


Megha Majumdar is the author of the bestselling novel A Burning, which has been recognized by the New York Times and nominated for several prestigious awards, including the National Book Award, the National Book Critics Circle’s John Leonard Prize, and the American Library Association’s Andrew Carnegie Medal. The book “A Burning” was recognized as one of the best of the year by various media outlets, including The Washington Post, The New York Times, NPR, The Atlantic, Vogue, and TIME Magazine.

In 2022, she received a Whiting Award. Born and raised in Kolkata, India, Majumdar holds degrees in anthropology from Harvard University and Johns Hopkins University. She is the former editor-in-chief of Catapult Books and currently resides in New York.



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Tell Me Everything: A Novel

Read: January 2025

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Tell Me Everything: A Novel

by Elizabeth Strout

Today, I dived into “Tell Me Everything: A Novel” by Elizabeth Strout, and I’m already captivated. This book made it onto NPR’s best books list for 2024 and caught the eye of Oprah’s Book Club—no small feat! Strout writes with such empathy and emotional depth that it reflects her incredible talent. Lucy beautifully captures this sentiment by stating, “Love comes in many different forms, but it is always love.”

With her profound understanding of the human condition and silences that convey deep emotions, Elizabeth Strout returns to the town of Crosby, Maine, reuniting with her beloved characters—Lucy Barton, Olive Kitteridge, Bob Burgess, and others—as they confront a shocking crime, navigate love while choosing to remain apart, and ponder the question, as Lucy Barton puts it, “What does anyone’s life mean?”

It’s autumn in Maine, and the town lawyer, Bob Burgess, finds himself entangled in a murder investigation, defending a lonely, isolated man accused of killing his mother. He has also developed a deep and abiding friendship with the acclaimed writer Lucy Barton, who lives nearby in a house by the sea with her ex-husband, William.

Lucy and Bob take walks and discuss their lives, fears, regrets, and what could have been. Meanwhile, Lucy is finally introduced to the iconic Olive Kitteridge, who now resides in a retirement community on the outskirts of town. They spend afternoons in Olive’s apartment, sharing stories about people they have known—what Olive calls “unrecorded lives,” which reanimate their experiences and imbue their lives with meaning.



When you purchase a book through one of my links, I earn a small commission that helps support my passion for reading. This contribution allows me to buy even more books to share with you, creating an incredible cycle of discovering great reads together! Your support truly makes a difference!


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