Brave Enough to See the Light

Brave Enough to See the Light

Brave Enough to Be the Light

Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 3 seconds

Amanda GormanI struggle to see the light and find my way as I live as a stranger in a strange land.

I was unmoored and adrift in troubled waters in my first hours as a widow.

One of the touchstones that helped me see the light was Amanda Gorman‘s poem “The Hill We Climb.”

The closing stanza reminded me that I must only be brave enough to see and be it.

For there is always light,
if only we’re brave enough to see it
If only we’re brave enough to be it.

Am I brave enough?

My daily goal is to see the light and be the light!

In this new phase of my life, I know that Jan wants me to be brave and be the light.

The only self-evident truth I know is that the love Jan and I shared will never die!


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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Jan Whispers Words of Wisdom

With raindrops falling on my head, I hear Jan whispering words of wisdom. When I find myself in times of trouble Mother Mary comes to me Speaking words of wisdom, let it be. And in my hour of darkness She is standing right in front of me Speaking words of wisdom, let it be. Let […]

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Brave Enough to See the Light
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My Friends: A Novel

Read: October 2024

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My Friends: A Novel

by Hisham Matar'

Today, I started reading Hisham Matar’s “My Friends: A Novel.” It is a finalist for the 2024 National Book Award for Fiction and the winner of the Orwell Prize for Political Fiction. This novel explores themes of friendship, family, and the harsh realities of exile. Hisham Matar is also the Pulitzer Prize-winning author of “The Return.” The pages on my Kindle App on my iPad fly like autumn’s falling leaves.

One evening, a young boy named Khaled, growing up in Benghazi, hears a captivating short story read aloud on the radio. The story, about a man being eaten alive by a cat, leaves an indelible mark on Khaled, igniting a lifelong fascination with the power of words and the enigmatic author, Hosam Zowa. This transformative experience sets Khaled on a journey that will lead him far from home to the University of Edinburgh to pursue a life of the mind.

In a new and unfamiliar environment, Khaled finds himself far from his familiar life in Libya. His resilience is tested when he attends a protest against the Qaddafi regime in London. The event turns into a tragedy, leaving Khaled injured and unable to leave Britain. Despite the danger posed by monitored phone lines, his determination to communicate his situation to his parents is a testament to his strength.

When Khaled has a chance encounter with Hosam Zowa, the author of a life-changing short story, at a hotel, Khaled begins the most profound friendship of his life. This friendship sustains him and eventually compels him, as the Arab Spring unfolds, to confront complex tensions between revolution and safety, family and exile, and how to define his sense of self concerning those closest to him.

A profound exploration of friendship and family and how time can test and fray these bonds, ‘My Friends‘ is a work of literature that resonates with its readers. Hisham Matar’s novel is not just a story but an achingly beautiful reflection on life and relationships crafted by an author at the peak of his powers.



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The Last White Man

Read: August 2022

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The Last White Man: A Novel

by Mohsin Hamid

The Last White Man by Mohsin Hamid is a story of love, loss, and rediscovery in a time of unsettling change. One morning, Anders, the novel’s protagonist,  wakes to find that his skin has turned dark, his reflection a stranger to him. At first, he tells only Oona, an old friend, newly a lover. Soon, reports of similar occurrences surface across the land.

In Mohsin Hamid’s “lyrical and urgent” prose (O Magazine), The Last White Man powerfully uplifts our capacity for empathy and the transcendence over bigotry, fear, and anger it can achieve.

I highly recommend this book. It was a page-turner that kept me thinking about love, loss, and rediscovery. All three are subjects close to my heart since Jan’s death.

I decided to read the book after hearing an interview with the author on All of It on WNYC.

The Goodreads summary provides a good overview,

One morning, Anders wakes to find that his skin has turned dark, his reflection a stranger to him. At first he tells only Oona, an old friend, newly a lover. Soon, reports of similar occurrences surface across the land. Some see in the transformations the long-dreaded overturning of an established order, to be resisted to a bitter end. In many, like Anders’s father and Oona’s mother, a sense of profound loss wars with profound love. As the bond between Anders and Oona deepens, change takes on a different shading: a chance to see one another, face to face, anew.

Hamid’s The Last White Man invites us to envision a future – our future – that dares to reimagine who we think we are, and how we might yet be together.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.

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A Train to Moscow

Read: February 2022

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A Train to Moscow

by Elena Gorokhova

A Train to Moscow by Elena Gorokhova is set in post–World War II Russia; a girl, must reconcile a tragic past with her hope for the future in this powerful and poignant novel about family secrets, passion, loss, perseverance, and ambition. In a small, provincial town behind the Iron Curtain, Sasha lives in a house full of secrets, one of which is her dream of becoming an actress.

When she leaves for Moscow to audition for drama school, she defies her mother and grandparents and abandons her first love, Andrei.

Before she leaves, Sasha discovers the hidden war journal of her uncle Kolya, an artist still missing in action years after the war has ended. His pages expose the official lies and the forbidden truth of Stalin’s brutality. Kolya’s revelations and tragic love story guide Sasha through drama school and cement her determination to live a thousand lives onstage.

After graduation, she begins acting in Leningrad, where Andrei, now a Communist Party apparatchik, becomes a censor of her work. As a past secret comes to light, Sasha’s ambitions converge with Andrei’s duties, and Sasha must decide if her dreams are genuinely worth the necessary sacrifice and if, as her grandmother likes to say, all will indeed be well.

This was a page-turner, as I held my breath to find out the next steps that Sasha would take. Her ambition combined with the secrets she learns keeps the reader focused on the next page.

I recommend this book.

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We the Animals

Read: July 2024

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We the Animals

by Justin Torres

Today, I embarked on the literary journey of We the Animals by Justin Torres. This novel, listed among the New York Times’ 100 Best Books of the Century, is a groundbreaking work of art. The author of Blackouts immerses us in the tumultuous heart of a family, the intense bonds of three brothers, and the mythic impact of this fierce love on the individuals we are destined to become.

The narrative unfolds as three brothers navigate their way through childhood, a journey filled with emotional highs and lows, from playful acts like smashing tomatoes on each other to finding solace in each other’s company during their parents’ conflicts and even tiptoeing around the house as their mother rests after her graveyard shift. Paps and Ma, hailing from Brooklyn—he’s Puerto Rican, she’s white—share a profound and challenging love, shaping and reshaping the family numerous times. Life in this family is intense and all-consuming, filled with disorder, heartache, and the ecstasy of belonging to each other.

From the intense familial unity, a child feels to the profound alienation he endures as he begins to see the world, this beautiful novel doesn’t just tell a coming-of-age story; it reinvents it in a sly and punch-in-the-stomach powerful way. It delves into themes such as love, the meaning of family, and heartache, adding another layer of depth and complexity to the story.

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Happiness Falls: A Novel

Read: September 2023

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Happiness Falls: A Novel

by Angie Kim

I highly recommend reading Happiness Falls, a book authored by Angie Kim. The story is about a family’s search for their missing father, which leads them to question their beliefs and relationships. The award-winning author of Miracle Creek writes this thrilling and emotionally profound book.

We didn’t call the police right away.” These are the first words of an extraordinary novel about a biracial Korean-American family in Virginia whose lives are upended when their beloved father and husband go missing.

Mia, the irreverent, hyper-analytical twenty-year-old daughter, has an explanation for everything—which is why she isn’t initially concerned when her father and younger brother Eugene don’t return from a walk in a nearby park. They must have lost their phone and or stopped for an errand somewhere. But by the time Mia’s brother runs through the front door bloody and alone, it becomes clear that the father in this tight-knit family is missing, and the only witness is Eugene, who has the rare genetic condition Angelman syndrome and cannot speak.

Happiness Falls is a gripping investigation that centers around a father’s disappearance and the intricate dynamics of his family. As the clock ticks, the family’s deepest secrets come to light, raising questions about love, communication, and the human experience. This novel is a thrilling blend of mystery, drama, and philosophical exploration, showcasing Angie Kim’s remarkable storytelling skills that garnered her numerous accolades for her debut novel, Miracle Creek. Through the family’s journey, Kim offers a fresh perspective on the missing person story, creating a memorable tale of a family that goes to great lengths to understand each other.


The Jan Lilien Education Fund sponsors ongoing sustainability and environmental awareness programs. Gifts made this month; I will match dollar-for-dollar. All donations are tax-deductible.

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I receive a commission when you buy a book or product using a link on this page. Thank you for supporting Sharing Jan’s Love blog.


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Grand Rapids: A Novel

Read: January 2026

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Grand Rapids: A Novel

by Natasha Stagg

Natasha Stagg‘s “Grand Rapids” is a coming-of-age story set in the Michigan suburbs in the early 2000s. Alexander Calder’s public sculpture, “La Grande Vitesse”, installed alongside the Grand River in downtown Grand Rapids, has become a symbol of the city. Tess moved there from Ypsilanti, Michigan, in 2001—the same year her mother passed away, marking the beginning of a time when everything felt like it was moving in slow motion for her.

Thrust into adolescence nearly rudderless, fifteen-year-old Tess is intoxicated, angsty, and sexually awake. A decade later, inspired by diary entries and TV reruns, she remembers this summer in the suburbs as the one that redefined her. Its echoes of death are frozen in time, like the waves represented in Calder’s sculpture or the concrete steps leading down to the churning river. She sees Grand Rapids as a collection of architecture and emblems, another home to which she cannot return.


Natasha Stagg is the author of Surveys: A Novel (2016), Sleeveless: Fashion, Image, Media, New York 2011–2019 (2019), and Artless: Stories 2019–2023 (2023). She lives in New York City.



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